Safe Place 2

Hugs unsure

I am going on a vacation on monday. With my mom and sister. I'm nervous about my sister coming as she is still unwell. I admitted to my mom my nervous feelings. She said she's thought about it tok, but had to ask if she wanted to come. I know this sounds really bad and wrong, but my sister can be a huge stress trigger

I remember this happening to me. I would take notes for hours on end to try to decode it. I hope it stops for you. It's awful.

This happened to me also, and yes, by the same people as it used to be. I am thinking it will never really stop.

He's gonna ask me out on Monday the same boy who left me once prevoced my phobia and called me fat but I love him..

TV and radios are talking about me in code too. It's little words they don't think I can hear louder than the rest and if you piece them together, it's beginning to sound like a plot. They've been trying since I was 13. I've made it 12 years with them coming after me. I've managed to outthink them and escape so far.

How are you?

Weird things man. I hate hearing what I do.

I'm starting to go downhill again. I'm hearing s*** again and just feel really confused and suicidal

I am sorry. Hope things get better soon

I'm sorry you are both struggling. It's so hard.

I hope you feel better soon. Those types of things can drive a person bonkers.

I'm trying. :/ how are you?

I am not me.

Lost out of thought and blank out a lot today so far.

Geez. I woke up from and into nightmare. Who the f painted my room purple and bought all these pink stuff and hello kitty carpet?! Pink is everuwhere makes me restless.

You are you. You may not think so, but you are still there. I'm sure things will settle soon.

I feel the same way.

I don't feel safe.

how come?

Entites want me to drain my blood. Yesterday I tried with a sewing needle but it bended and I couldn't reach a vein. Then I thought on waiting until I need to be done a blood test in two months, and this is what I want to do but they are making pressure inside my head to control me and make me try again with a razor knife.

Don't listen to them. have you tried anything from singing, doing puzzles or math, anything that stimulates your mind? That's what helps me the most.

Thank you for the support.

I have been trying to focus on something else but it is hard to do it 24h a day...

anyway, now I am better, this morning I could talk with the psych nurse at the day hospitan and she was understanding.

just leave me alone
why are you controlling my thoughts why are you trying toco back into my life
I don't want you here anymore please just leave me alone!!!