Favorite Self-Help book?

Well, Dr. Clay's is my favorite :-) but what books have you read/are you reading now that are good?

I just started Never Eat Alone and Other Secrets to Success, One Relationship at a Time, by Keith Ferrazzi. I bought it to see if it had ideas on how one can make friends as an adult. It's got a blurb on its cover, "How to Build a Lifelong Community of Colleagues, Contacts, Friends, and Mentors."

My Best Self Help Book............................. is:

<font color="blue"> "Feelings Buried Alive Never Die" </font>

By - <font color="blue"> Karol K. Truman </font>

* * * * * * * *

I have a lot of self help books that I use many of them are listed in the dissociative disorders message board in the thread - resources - that is pinned to the top of the page. but among them are-

The Courage to heal text and workbook by Laura Davis http://www.lauradavis.net

I thought we'd never speak again also by Laura Davis and can be found on her website

Becoming the parent you want to be also by Laura Davis and can be found on her website previously posted and at http://www.becomingtheparent.com/all/hp.html

Getting Through The Day by Nancy J Napier and can be found at http//www.nancyjnapier.com

Recreating Yourself also by Nancy J Napier and available at the above website

Sacred Practices for conscious living also by Nancy J Napier and available at the above website

Amongst ourselves by Dr Tracy Alderman and Karen Marshall

Mind over Mood by Dennis Greenberger, PhD and Christine A Padesky, Phd

The Relaxation and Stress Reduction Workbook by Martha Davis PhD, Elizabeth Robbins Eshelman, MSW and Mathew McKay

The Depression workbook

The anger workbook

The anxiety workbokk

Managing stress through the arts

just to name a few.

Whose "anger workbook" do you like, myself? I really got a lot of help from Lorraine Bilodeau's:

http://www.amazon.com/Anger-Workbook...dp/1568380542/

Perna:

As usual you are asking important questions. I am, of course, interested in hearing people opinions of different books. I have spent 30 years reading and reviewing self-help books (which doesn't make me a better critic than anyone else). What is a good book to a certain person depends on what problems you have, the ways of changing that best suit you, how much you want to read the details and the research (or just go to the key ideas), and so on.

There are 2,000 self-help books published every year and that has been true for at least 30 years, so that is 60,000 books. Many of the old books are so good they remain popular.

One of the things I like about my book is that my material is very comprehensive...you can find out almost any problem in Psychological Self-Help. And I try to briefly describe several 100's of problems and give directions for simple, clear self-treatment methods, plus giving references to well over 2000 books and how-to articles. In more recent years, the search engines are the best competition in terms of finding books focusing on specific problems. My broad survey book can very rarely be the best book for a very restricted problem area.

I wrote a 1750 page book that will surely never be published in print because (1) I wanted a text book that would address any problem that a student walking into a class might have and want to change and (2) because there are potential benefits from reading about concerns that you hadn't realized yet. Prevention may be as important as coping. That is why I recommend that readers skip around and explore areas of interest.

drclay

Rhapsody:

Tell us a little more about Feelings Buried Alive Never Die. How are you using this book?

Thanks.

Myself:

It is so important to "have a purpose," I think. The main difficulty for most people is carrying out the necessary steps to achieve that grand purpose.

For instance, many of us would believe the purpose of feeding starving children, preventing war and the brutality and rape that accompanies war, curing AIDS, providing a good education and work for every child, and so on are noble purposes. But figuring how to contribute to those causes and getting ourselves to make the needed sacrafices are very hard.

Any ideas about living according to your best values?

drclay

Pernal:

That is a nice list.

drclay

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
drclay said:
Rhapsody:

Tell us a little more about Feelings Buried Alive Never Die. How are you using this book?

Thanks.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">


I have been using the book "Feelings Buried Alive Never Die" as a means to locate and uncover the truth behind how my unhealed CORE FEELING - MY INNER BELIEF SYSTEM has profoundly effected the way I react to the world today, with all people and with in all situations.... physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually.

I have been able to obtain a better understanding to "WHY" I feel certain ways when I become upset, hurt, rejected or forgotten by the people I love.....
I have taken the information learned and applied them in simply ways that I can use to change and improve my life.... by understanding how the original ME (my original blue print - the one I was born with) has been greatly altered by my unresolved unhealed wounds I have been able to work on my inner healing by implementing "The Script" whenever I feel unsettled or uncomfortable with in my own body.

I am learning to love ME again... by reestablishing the lost parts of ME - by replacing my controlling negative thoughts & beliefs with true & positive ones.

I am rebuilding ME.... from the inside out, one broken feeling at a time.

* * * * * * * * * * * *

Yup that one is the one the therapists copied out of for the anger management class that I took.

I just noticed in my first post the Nancy J Napeir link is not working so here it is again

http://www.nancyjnapier.com

Rhapsody:

Thanks for the information about Feeling Buried Alive. Very interesting and you seem to be using it effectively, so I'd like to know more about it. At one point you say you are "replacing my controlling negative thoughts & beliefs with true & positive ones." That sounds like Cognitive Therapy. But you also say at another place you are "healing by implementing 'The Script.' " That doesn't tell me very much, can you be more specific and tell me more. Perhaps you can give me a specific example of how you detect and sooth old wounds to make yourself feel better.

Thanks for teaching us.

drclay

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
drclay said:
Rhapsody:

Thanks for the information about Feeling Buried Alive. Very interesting and you seem to be using it effectively, so I'd like to know more about it. At one point you say you are "replacing my controlling negative thoughts & beliefs with true & positive ones." That sounds like Cognitive Therapy. But you also say at another place you are "healing by implementing 'The Script.' " That doesn't tell me very much, can you be more specific and tell me more. Perhaps you can give me a specific example of how you detect and sooth old wounds to make yourself feel better.

Thanks for teaching us.

drclay

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">


Yes I guess in away "The Script" is a form of Cognitive Therapy for emotional healing, for you are taking a bad or awful feeling away and replacing it with a more positive & uplifting one.... You are replacing your old belief system, the one that got created during childhood abuse or trauma, with a new more connected feeling - the loving & secure belief system that should have been yours as a child.... as you grew into an adult in the loving hands of parents & many other people that cared.

<font color="blue"> ~ Emotional Healing ~
</font>

"The Script" - (LINK http://hometown.aol.com/rhapsodychil...age/howto.html

With "The Script" I have been able to learn that every wounded soul must remove their false and negative belief system, the one that was created within them during childhood abuse or trauma, as a means to heal and to be able to move forward - to move into the living phase of LIFE no longer being controlled by past wounds..... then you can enjoy the remaining life time you have been given to its fullest and without fear or insecurities from the past.

To sum it all up - this book and the resources obtained with in its pages have enabled me to see how stuck feelings / wounds can and will interfere with my present life and happiness if I allow them to remain in me..... if I do not work hard at HEALING ME from the inside out, if I refuse to see my belief system as false (tainted by an abusive past) - needing to be replaced.

SORRY if I am not making to much sense right now..... but I seem to go and come in stages of being able to express my feelings brilliantly to not being able to put two words together to save my life..... and right now I am in the dumb founded stage of artistic expressions.


LoVe,
Rhapsody -

The Road Less Traveled by Scott M. Peck.

Anyone read Don Aslett's books? I just bought, Weekend Makeover: Take Your Home from Messy to Magnificent in Only 48 Hours!! I'll let you know the weekend of November 18/19 how I do Next weekend is my community's yard sale and a friend or two are coming over to help me with that so hopefully I'll have made some room for organizing the rest of the stuff (and some money).

I like books on stories about the person telling about their life and how they cope, a good example on these type of books but not on mental illness is The year I got Polio by Peg Keret.
I also like just random quote books or just any book, a simple saying could bring an idea to be like a TON of bricks!

I'm really enjoying and using LEARNED OPTIMISM How to change your mind and your life by Martin EP Seligman PH.D.

MY favorite is Dr David Burn's The Feeling Good Handbook. It is cognitive therapy based and focuses on depression and anxiety. My counselor is trying to loan me one of hers that she uses with clients with social anxiety. I will probably see what it is in a few days. T almost never names books to me. So it surprised me that she wanted to loan me this one when she has never loaned me a book and I have been seeing her for around ten months. I know it will be good because she has good tastes in books. She is the one who named The Feeling Good Handbook to me.

Melody Beattie's Beyond Codependency and her daily meditation series have been life savers this summer. Her writing style is very easy to read and it was an eye opener for me. I saw myself in so much of the books. But the good thing is, I also saw a sense of hope that yes, I am those ways but there are things I can do about it. It's not all hopeless, as I've always figured. The daily meditations are very uplifting.

The previous posters have mentioned some outstanding books. These kinds of recommendations are worth listening to. There are several thousand books available in libraries and bookstores and also many mental health centers have bookshelves. Finding the better books out of hundreds in a specific area of interest to you is the problem. You can look up books covering the areas that concern you by looking at the Chapter titles in my book. Refer to the book's bibliography to get the reference...or read a brief summary in the t ext. Over 2000 useful books are cited in there.

Reading the better books has been shown over and over to be helpful. Not all books are helpful, however.

Dr. Clay

My T loaned me The Shyness and Social Anxiety Workbook by Anthony. I can't find it right now. But, I am wondering how many of you have had your T loan you a book? My T made it out that it is unusual for her because she worries about getting the book back. I am almost done reading it. But, I want to work through some of the exposure exercises with T. I think T likes to tell me about books because I am a student and have a higher reading comprehension level than verbal comprehension level. T couldn't explain to me what I can understand in a good book on the subject. I found a good book that recommends websites and books for depression and anxiety at my school library.

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
phillygirl said:
Melody Beattie's Beyond Codependency and her daily meditation series have been life savers this summer. Her writing style is very easy to read and it was an eye opener for me. I saw myself in so much of the books. But the good thing is, I also saw a sense of hope that yes, I am those ways but there are things I can do about it. It's not all hopeless, as I've always figured. The daily meditations are very uplifting.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

i agree with you, phillygirl.....i was introduced to her books about 100 years ago and i still have my little daily meditation book. so far it has helped me to deal with a lot of my everyday stressors......
and as we are all SO different, different strokes for different folks.........xoxoxo pat

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
Sarah116 said:
I like books on stories about the person telling about their life and how they cope, a good example on these type of books but not on mental illness is The year I got Polio by Peg Keret.
I also like just random quote books or just any book, a simple saying could bring an idea to be like a TON of bricks!

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">
Sarah, me too, I love both those things; case histories and good quotes. I copied a whole lot of quotes into my journal a zillion years ago but didn't write down the authors or books they came from :-(

"Frustration is supposed to create action, not make you give up."

"Real obstacles don't take you in circles. They can be overcome. Invented ones are like a maze."

"Never confuse ignorance with wrongness or weakness. Remember that to yourself, you are and always will be the strongest element in your environment."

"Unkind criticism is never part of a meaningful critique of you. Its purpose is not to teach or help, its purpose is to punish."

"Life is not a skill sport. It does not require hand-eye coordination. It is not determined by our intelligence quotient, not dependent on a beautific vision. It is a game anyone can play and play well."

"We are suggesting that you take control of your life and environment rather than trying to control yourself."

"Clarify any wish or dream or goal and experience the uncanny feeling that you have somehow magnetized information, people and opportunities to flow toward you."

Glad you do, I have also copied quotes into my journals, I have like 35 journaland notebooks now!

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
drclay said:
The previous posters have mentioned some outstanding books. These kinds of recommendations are worth listening to. There are several thousand books available in libraries and bookstores and also many mental health centers have bookshelves. Finding the better books out of hundreds in a specific area of interest to you is the problem. You can look up books covering the areas that concern you by looking at the Chapter titles in my book. Refer to the book's bibliography to get the reference...or read a brief summary in the t ext. Over 2000 useful books are cited in there.

Reading the better books has been shown over and over to be helpful. Not all books are helpful, however.

Dr. Clay

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

The book that introduced me to cbt is still my favorite, Been There, Done That? DO THIS! by Sam Obitz because it was the one that motivated me to give the exercises that have helped me a try and it was a quick book to read which is always a plus when are at a place in your life where you are easily overwhelmed.
I agree with Dr. Clay about a lot of the previous recs being great. I have since read The Road Less Traveled, Learned Optimism and Feeling Good and would say those are all great books too.

Link to my favorite self-help books foreword:
http://www.supertao.com/book_forward.html