What did you do right today? Part 2

showed compassion, understanding and a slice of humor!

Wow, I wish my days were this productive. Great job, Rose76!


I rarely call anyone anymore, but I called someone who is (I think) becoming a friend to talk about our races over the weekend. We were genuinely interested in each other's "war" stories, and we even made plans to run together soon. I'd forgotten how nice it is to have someone to share my rare moments of joy with. She is reliable, honest, and straightforward. I really hope we will become good friends.

I think I might be getting better...I haven't wanted to talk to anyone for a very long time, but I called today to share. I hope I'm getting better.

Went to work. Bit my tongue and held my real thoughts in check. Smiled even when I didn't feel like smiling.

Tomorrow - repeat of today
Day after tomorrow - another repeat.

Morningcalm - WAY TO GO!

Woke up in a great mood.

I took a shower i've ate

I cooked a special meal for my husband.

Hardly a G.D. thing

I wrote out the things that I want to talk about in Therapy this coming next session (the more red flag things than anything)-- I do plan on taking it and talking to her about the things... I hope I do--

Woke up in a good mood again -- how long can this last?
Had a good breakfast.
Took my morning meds on time.
Have been cleaning my house.
Promised to visit an old friend.
Fought off getting scared by worries.

I dragged out of bed because I told a friend I'd meet her for coffee. As I was getting dressed, she called and said she couldn't meet me. Instead of crawling back into bed (as I really wanted to), I finished dressing and got out and did some serious Christmas shopping.

Went running with my new friend today. And also did some hill work on my own. I felt 1000 times better afterwards. I need to structure my runs so that I can continue to get better.

Dina is a good listener and knows how to keep the conversation moving...I "almost" felt sort of "normal"...like her...whatever that means. As nice as she is, being with her brings out an odd feeling of pleasure and anxiety. But I decided to trust her and went with the flow of things - without trying to control everything. After I got home, I made some hot chai and caesar salad for lunch. I had a really nice day...it was good for me.

Despite a very late start, stuck to the plan and got our Christmas tree today, finding and cutting it at last light, leaving just as they were closing (nick of time!).
Did the not-fun part of putting it in the stand, so it's ready for the fun bits tomorrow.

I successfully made it through a very bad anxiety attack, hospitalization and am home now with more support in order for me and a better understanding of small steps to take first, like getting better sleep.

Cooked a pot roast for dinner. It actually turned out well. (Considering my husband and I hardly ever cooked anything other than what came out of a can, box or bag it was quite an accomplishment.)

And I started posting on PC a little more. Time to come out of my shell for a while.

I woke up in a good mood.
I ate a good breakfast.

Went to visit a friend who needed some company.
Ended my visit when I felt it was appropriate, and did not let my friend hold me hostage for the entire day. After 3 hours of me patiently listening to non-stop talking, I decided I did not have to wait for her permission to end my visit. This was huge for me. It had been pre-argeed that I would be stopping by for coffee and a chat. Normally, I feel so bad for anyone who is lonely that I can not bring myself to disengage. By starting to do that, I will be able to retain, as friends, persons whom I care for, but who try to take too much control.

Came home feeling so glad that I challenged myself, and practiced a new skill, that I felt real motivated to attend to things needing attention. Did more housework. Organized some files.

Socialized briefly with some neighbors, but, again, extricated myself when I needed to get on with my own stuff. One can't let oneself be totally at any other person's disposal, barring some dire circumstance. Since childhood, I had a bad tendency to do that. I am learning new ways to negotiate socially. Very much needed that I do.

Tomorrow, I can re-read this and consolidate the lesson.

I forced myself to go out of the house and interact socially. Not easy for me to do, but I actually had fun!

(WELL DONE, you all! )

Got new lights for the tree (old ones were )) and decorated it.

I actually talked to T about what I wrote- I let her have my notes too-- I don't think she will get all of them, they were Beauflow style, and some incomplete thoughts and stuff lol

but still=- I feel this amount of weight lifted off of me, i feel i was more honest with t today as well-- that is a big plus.. talked about some things that i have issues sharing with others due to I know, I know they are not normal-- everyone yes does get mad, but my thoughts go to extreme which even at times scare me..... sigh... i hope t does not get mad about the part we did not get to talk fully about that I wrote down-- feeling of her trying to get rid of me- we did talk about partially at times I feel like quitting therapy which has a lot of influences in it-- that was just one i had not mentioned. maybe it is best for her to read it i think..

Second day of no smoking; ate good breakfast, whole grain hot cereal, yoghurt; did some laundry; walked dog...cut out and sewed final border for quilt top I'm giving to my daughter as a "peace offering." Several hours have gone into it already. I have to hand sew the top to the lofty stuff and construct the backing. Cleaning living room floor; decided, as it's raining, not to go to store for Christmas stuff as I'd be tempted to buy cigs. It's mind over matter on this one. Quitting for an entire year will pay my property taxes. 'learning to do little steps at a time on big projects; felt slightly depressed, don't see psychDr. until 12/15/2011; let's hope he gets it right this time for depression and anxiety. Made arrangements for a grave blanket of greens with my sibllings for our parents' resting site. Answered no phone calls. Told my dog how much I loved and appreciated her; I do that most every day. She has her own bedroom now.

Took and shower and got dressed -- even if it was 4 pm, today, that is an accomplishment.

Managed to re-list a few Ebay things.

I accepted my son's invitation to go to the mall, and therefore got out of the apartment.

Didn't flip my ****! Lol.

One of my dogs stayed up all night scratching herself, which also kept me tossing and turning with worries.

So I got up this morning(instead of ruminating in bed like I usually do), and groomed her and put itch medicine on some bug bites I found. She was much more comfortable and relaxed afterwards. I think, she even smiled...

I'm so relieved she's feeling better...She's good little dog.

I went a smoked with a new-er co-worker... I have anxiety with such things, but it was good- we just talked about work bs and stuff lol... but still- good thing for getting out of my bubble.