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  #1  
Old Jun 13, 2011, 03:32 PM
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rainbow_rose rainbow_rose is offline
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i hate when it keeps me housebound. i hate when it takes all the courage i can muster to go to the store and the whole time I'm there, i'm fighting to keep the anxiety at bay and can't wait to get home.

i hate it.

i just needed to vent. thanks for listening.
__________________
Happiness cannot be found
through great effort and willpower,
but is already present,
in open relaxation and letting go.

Don't strain yourself,
there is nothing to do or undo.
Whatever momentarily arises
in the body-mind
Has no real importance at all,
has little reality whatsoever.

Don't believe in the reality
of good and bad experiences;
they are today's ephemeral weather,
like rainbows in the sky.


~Venerable Lama Gendun Rinpoche~

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  #2  
Old Jun 13, 2011, 04:23 PM
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BatsAndButterflies BatsAndButterflies is offline
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I agree to all of that. I hate that it's the only that stands between be and a good relationship with someone else. I hate that it keeps me from achieving my full potential. I hate that it gives off the impression that I'm lazy when I know I am not.

I understand. It really sucks.

It's good that you decided to vent though. Venting helps take that anger and direct it where it should be instead of at ourselves.
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i hate anxiety
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“Those who danced were thought to be quite insane by those who could not hear the music."

i hate anxiety
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  #3  
Old Jun 13, 2011, 04:48 PM
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kaliope kaliope is offline
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My anxiety keeps me very limited as well. I go to work, which I have deemed a safe place and then go straight home. I typically do not leave my home all weekend. I do not know if I am agorophobic, but I may as well be because it takes a lot to get me to leave my apartment. Sometimes I walk out the door and it seems like the whole world instantly sucks in on me. In the past, i have left my grocery cart sitting in the store aisle and walked out of the store. I have to really prepare myself to go shopping and I have a list and go only to those aisles and get what I need after I get off work and get out of there as quickly as possible. It was really hard after my daughter left because she used to take me shopping. I have however saved more money since she has left, lol.
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  #4  
Old Jun 13, 2011, 04:51 PM
lokeluche lokeluche is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rainbow_rose View Post
i hate when it keeps me housebound. i hate when it takes all the courage i can muster to go to the store and the whole time I'm there, i'm fighting to keep the anxiety at bay and can't wait to get home.

i hate it.

i just needed to vent. thanks for listening.
Same here ! It is horrible ...and I have to drive and I hate it ! I once had a panic attack whilst driving which almost cost me my life ! I totally relate to the housebound feeling, the store, thinking about it before hand when it should be so easy..avoiding people..
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  #5  
Old Jun 13, 2011, 10:31 PM
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bllauben bllauben is offline
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<<Hugs to rainbow_rose>>
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  #6  
Old Jun 14, 2011, 05:11 PM
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lxegirl lxegirl is offline
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i know how you feel... not wanting to deal with ppl...afraid you're going to lose it any moment...i know, hun. just try and get through it :/
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  #7  
Old Jun 14, 2011, 05:47 PM
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rainbow_rose rainbow_rose is offline
looking for rainbows
 
Member Since: May 2011
Posts: 2,653
thanks, everyone for your comments. it's nice to not be alone in feeling this way.
__________________
Happiness cannot be found
through great effort and willpower,
but is already present,
in open relaxation and letting go.

Don't strain yourself,
there is nothing to do or undo.
Whatever momentarily arises
in the body-mind
Has no real importance at all,
has little reality whatsoever.

Don't believe in the reality
of good and bad experiences;
they are today's ephemeral weather,
like rainbows in the sky.


~Venerable Lama Gendun Rinpoche~

  #8  
Old Jun 16, 2011, 12:49 AM
loveneverfails87 loveneverfails87 is offline
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Member Since: Jun 2011
Location: Georgia
Posts: 6
I feel the same way sometimes. When I actually took medication and was able to control my anxiety I was fine. I came off of it a few months ago and thought I was doing okay until just recently. My panic attacks are full-blown once again and it's absolutely driving me crazy. I don't mind going out but I don't like going alone and I hate being alone anywhere. I hate when I get like this because it's almost as if my body has completely shut down and I hate the strain it puts on me and my family. I hope things get better for you. I'm new to this site so it's taking me a little while to figure it out but feel free to message me anytime if you wanna talk. It helps me to talk about it. I feel like I'm not alone when I do, but it's hard to talk to family because they just don't understand.
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  #9  
Old Jun 19, 2011, 04:06 PM
Chefguy Chefguy is offline
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Posts: 20
Your not alone thats for sure, a couple of years ago I lived right next to a subway. All I wanted was a damn sandwich..sounds easy to achieve. The closer I got to the counter the worse I got..the clerk asked me what I wanted and I bailed..practicly ran out of the place..damn ridiculous. I wish us all luck..so silly this condition is of ours, yet so (bleep) life altering.
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  #10  
Old Jun 19, 2011, 07:03 PM
duzzie duzzie is offline
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Posts: 4
It sucks. I've been dealing with heavy anxiety since I hit puberty. i don't know why but I have a very poor self image. I always feel like people are judging me every time they look at me. So...I've been locked away for a few years now. I hate it.
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  #11  
Old Jun 19, 2011, 09:51 PM
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Secretum Secretum is offline
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I also feel like people are always judging me. It's so bad that I often spend my time at home locked in my room, because I don't feel comfortable around my own family. I am going to have to tell them that I've been diagnosed with bipolar at some point (should have told them a month ago when I got home from college) and just the thought of that conversation makes my heart race.

I also have a bit of a driving phobia. I didn't get my license until I was 18, because my state requires people under 18 to have 50 hrs worth of supervised practice, and I never wanted to drive. I am now 19, and I still hate it. I have to pick up my brother from summer school tomorrow, and I'm scared I'll drift out of my lane, sideswipe a semi truck, and die. Or rear end someone. Or be rear ended. (people around here like to tailgate). My neighborhood has a lot of little ponds, and I used to be afraid that I'd drive into one of them.

My fear often keeps me from taking risks, which in turn makes my life very boring and unsatisfying. Even when I'm hypomanic, I'm inhibited.

I apologize for the whiny post. I just really hate anxiety. : (
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  #12  
Old Jun 25, 2011, 11:37 AM
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danii24 danii24 is offline
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Location: Ireland
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i know what yous are saying. i always avoid having to go out if i can. I don't feel comfortable around family and friends so i avoid alot of social things with them. I feel uncomfortable going outside because i think people are staring at me.

I left the post office without evening collecting my money because there was to many people and my head was spinning. I missed so much time from college i ended up failing. Anxiety is awful. i agree with secretum live is boring and unsatisfactory
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  #13  
Old Jun 28, 2011, 09:43 PM
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rainbow_rose rainbow_rose is offline
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Member Since: May 2011
Posts: 2,653
another reason to hate it.... had an anxiety attack at work. don't know why. I was actually thinking good thoughts before it hit me suddenly. hard to feel that way and not be able to 'let it out'.

it sucks. and I have no idea what the trigger was.
__________________
Happiness cannot be found
through great effort and willpower,
but is already present,
in open relaxation and letting go.

Don't strain yourself,
there is nothing to do or undo.
Whatever momentarily arises
in the body-mind
Has no real importance at all,
has little reality whatsoever.

Don't believe in the reality
of good and bad experiences;
they are today's ephemeral weather,
like rainbows in the sky.


~Venerable Lama Gendun Rinpoche~

  #14  
Old Jul 01, 2011, 05:50 PM
RunningEagleRuns RunningEagleRuns is offline
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Member Since: Jun 2010
Posts: 1,067
Quote:
Originally Posted by duzzie View Post
It sucks. I've been dealing with heavy anxiety since I hit puberty. i don't know why but I have a very poor self image. I always feel like people are judging me every time they look at me. So...I've been locked away for a few years now. I hate it.
What do you mean "locked away" Inside? Or literally locked up?
  #15  
Old Jul 07, 2011, 06:09 PM
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TwoTone TwoTone is offline
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My heart goes out to you *hugs i found something that really helped is mind over matter techniques...i.e reasoning. to explain a bit- to date from my research a panic attack wont really harm u in any way,easy said then done when ur scared of everything but....by tellin myself this over and over i relise that im not so scared of them. for example when i start to feel panicky about poeple or situation i think to myself......ok worst case scenario= i have a panick attack. ok next thing is..well im goin to lean on something and feel dizzy...but other then that physically i will be fine...so next stage is---it will all be over in 5 to 10 minutes sooo jus relax and let it happen. now i know this may sound crazy but with knowing that at the end of it i will be fine...i actually find the attack subsides XD this has happened over time by mind over matter and reasuring myself all the time but....its working. i really help this helps u as it has me. please pm me if u want to know more or have not understood my bad explanation. Be strong , uve made it this far!! Weldone *pats on back and gives gold star XD
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  #16  
Old Jul 10, 2011, 03:24 AM
Nalgene Nalgene is offline
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Member Since: Jul 2011
Posts: 3
Today, the reason why I logged on was because I felt I was stuck in a loop. Like your brain thinks the same thing over again. I am usually very good at hiding it, but today I sat on the couch with restless emotions and thoughts for the whole day with a few exceptions where I got up. I felt like I was stuck in a dream where someone is holding you and wont let you move...I hate anxiety
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  #17  
Old Jan 29, 2012, 03:45 PM
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rainbow_rose rainbow_rose is offline
looking for rainbows
 
Member Since: May 2011
Posts: 2,653
i'm bumping up this thread 'cause i still hate anxiety.

i hate that it takes me hours to convince myself to go to the store and instead of going to the store i wanted to go to, I go to the closest one, not getting things i really wanted 'cause all I want to do is get back inside.

i hate anxiety.
__________________
Happiness cannot be found
through great effort and willpower,
but is already present,
in open relaxation and letting go.

Don't strain yourself,
there is nothing to do or undo.
Whatever momentarily arises
in the body-mind
Has no real importance at all,
has little reality whatsoever.

Don't believe in the reality
of good and bad experiences;
they are today's ephemeral weather,
like rainbows in the sky.


~Venerable Lama Gendun Rinpoche~


Last edited by rainbow_rose; Jan 29, 2012 at 06:26 PM. Reason: spelling
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  #18  
Old Jan 29, 2012, 04:13 PM
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healed84 healed84 is offline
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Posts: 7,574
((((rainbow)))) I know how you feel these last couple of weeks of been the worst for me.. going from okay to panic stricken, and refusing to leave the house. It sucks big time. Hang in there.
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"You decide every moment of every day who you are and what you believe in. You get a second chance, every second."

"You fail to recognize that it matters not what someone is born, but what they grow to be!" - J.K. Rowling. Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire.
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  #19  
Old Jan 29, 2012, 06:42 PM
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BlondeFairy BlondeFairy is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rainbow_rose View Post
i'm bumping up this thread 'cause i still hate anxiety.

i hate that it takes me hours to convince myself to go to the store and instead of going to the store i wanted to go to, I go to the closest one, not getting things i really wanted 'cause all I want to do is get back inside.

i hate anxiety.
I hate anxiety tooooo!!! I know exactly how you feel! It is horrible!! I understand how you feel completely!! Im here if you need to talk!!
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"Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared with scars."- Kahlil Gibran
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  #20  
Old Jan 29, 2012, 09:18 PM
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gma45 gma45 is offline
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Location: In & out of my mind!
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Me too! It really has kept me from my full potential most of my life!
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rainbow_rose
  #21  
Old Jan 30, 2012, 01:59 AM
Anonymous100153
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Posts: n/a
Anxiety has taken over my life. I'm in therapy for it but wow, it's powerful. Right now it is stronger than I am and I don't know if I'll ever defeat it. Hugs to all who are in the same place.
Thanks for this!
rainbow_rose
  #22  
Old Jan 30, 2012, 05:21 PM
more70 more70 is offline
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Member Since: Jan 2012
Posts: 5
I wish I could say I don't mind anxeity and that I have managed it and was able to use it for my benefit but I can't. I guess that's what I was supposed to learn way back when I was 17 and went through all that therapy. At least I thought I was going that direction but then life happened and now 23 years later I'm back, yet again in another crap whole of panic and depression wondering how the heck I got here again. back in therapy for the third time I'm wondering if there is anything I haven't learned already. Oh well....against the words of my previous therapists (she always was right tho) I have to agree with the rest of you....I HATE ANXIETY!
Thanks for this!
rainbow_rose
  #23  
Old Jan 31, 2012, 06:52 AM
lancetrot lancetrot is offline
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Member Since: Nov 2011
Posts: 187
I've it too, I have random panic attacks that are brought out by nothing. I got to consult my doctor finally, after consuming the paramedics out 3 times in a week because of it. My doctor was phenomenal, spoke to me calmly for ages about things that are occurring in my life. He prescribed me a modest antidepressant, and although I still experience very anxious sometimes, I feel a lot more better. Counselling could benefit you as well... Just visit your G.P and you will be fine soon.
Thanks for this!
rainbow_rose
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