[brittani916]

I'm new to this site. I'm 18 and during the past year i've been experiencing bipolar disorder symptoms. It's recently gotten worse and I am so confused and i don't even know what normal is. sometimes i just stop and think im going completely crazy. My dad and my aunt have bipolar disorder, we all know it for sure but they have never been diagnosed. My moods change dramatically, for awhile i will feel like the happiest person in the world, i am so lucky to have this life, i'm so smart i know everything about everything, my future is going to be amazing, etc. And then the next day or the next week, i feel like everything sucks theres no reason for me to be here, nobody understands me or loves me, i'm stupid i will never amount to anything..... etc. Sometimes i get really really angry, to the point where i cannot control anything i say or do.... and i've gotten in fights with my boyfriend and i've hit him in multiple situations... He sees the manic depression in me a lot because his dad has it. We've talked about how i need to get help but im just scared and confused and don't know how to get help! im always taking screening tests online and looking up information and i found this site today, and i thought with the support and help of others i will go get help.
any comments or suggestions would be great : ]

[bipolar_bear]

Welcom to PC. You may want to consider seeing a psychiatrist. They are trained to diagnose people and can provide the care you may need. It takes a trained professional to make this type of diagnosis. I am glad that you are recognizing some signs that you may need some help to become stabalized. I understand how scary it is to find help that you will be comfortable with. Many times you can speak to them on the phone prior to making an appointment and see if you are comfortable persuing it further. I hope you find that you can get the help you need. It sounds like your boyfriend is supportive. That is great. Good luck. Keep us posted.

[Jkeyz]

Brittani--Go Get Help! The sooner you get help, the sooner you will feel better. The longer you wait, the harder is it to treat and you'll just be miserable. Please go get help. You will see that asking for help is easier than you thought it would be. I agree, it is scary. You can do it though!! You've already come this far to recognize it in yourself. Take care of yourself!

[brittani916]

So i went to the doctors today, figuring i could get something accomplished. I've been having anxiety really bad lately, and it usually comes and goes but for the past month it just will not go away, and its very stressful on top of my mood swings. So i go to the doctors, and when he gets in, he says that everybody my age gets anxiety. then i told him all about my mood swings. he said its because of pms and i need to take birth control. i was not very happy when he said that. i was litterally only in the room for about 15 minutes, i barely got any words in because all he was doing was blabbing his mouth about pms. umm, i'm not that dramatic i know the different between my pmsing and when i have crazy mood swings 24/7!!! it was so frustrating i just was trying not to cry. so he realized i wasnt very happy about the birth control thing, so he said if i want to make a counseling appointment i can. so i did. and its not for over a month! he didnt give me any kind of relaxation tips or anything for my anxiety, not even any advice. It just made it so much worse.
i'm going to have to find another doctor fast because that just didnt do anything for me.
and my mom is so oblivious, shes like well why would they want you to go to counseling? shes in such denial about anyhting thats ever wrong with me i cant explain anything to her.

i'm so upset

[june30]

oh man, i'm so sorry.

it's really hard, y'know? i'm 21, diagnosed age 16, and for several years my mom was in total denial! it was just recently she started talking about "my condition". i promise that it gets easier to deal with if you tenacious about getting better and feeling good... the more you resign to being depressed, the more serious your depression gets. if you decide to be there for yourself and take care of yourself, a happy BP life is extremely possible.

it's really hard at age 18 too, because you already have a lot of life changes on your mind, and doctors/parents are more likely to see your problems as being a symptom of your age. but you know yourself... don't let anybody tell you it's freakin' PMS, or hormones. Even if it was, does that make it ok to feel depressed and anxious all the time? No. It takes a long time to find the right meds and the right therapist for you as an individual... don't resign yourself until you feel well taken care of.

you're gonna be ok!

[CowOne1231]

Brittani, I know exactly what you mean, I had a doctor do that to me once and walked out of his office crying. Some general practitioners are not familiar enough with young people or specialized disorders to understand how hard it is just to seek out help. That first appointment with counseling is a big step and I hope it helps. It can be really frustrating in the mean time to know that you are behaving in a way you can't seem to control. Try to find a quiet place that is very comfortable to you and tell yourself to take one thing at a time. It sounds silly but sometimes helps me when I am frustrated and overwhelmed, which can be often. I wish you luck, you are going to be just fine.