[UpDownMiddleGround]

I slept but not well. Overall, I feel pretty stable. I think I have balanced out enough to go ahead and come off the rest of my meds. I think I will wait until after my T appointment on Tuesday. That way, when we talk about it, she will see how stable I am on the reduced dosage.

[Victoria'smom]

I just told my mom over Facebook I'm manic. They don't believe in mental illness.

[bizi]

Originally Posted by Miguel'smom

I just told my mom over Facebook I'm manic. They don't believe in mental illness.

Can you call your pdoc? Do you have extra meds to take when you get manic.
Please be safe.
(((HUGS))))
bizi

[Victoria'smom]

I just called the nurses line to see if I can take my old sleeping med. So I'm waiting to hear back from them. I took an old ativan but that did nothing. Walgreen's wont give me my kolotipin until the dr re-authorizes it.

[Victoria'smom]

I feel ****ing fantastic though.

[gina_re]

I don't feel like working today. I probably won't get much done.

[hopeless2015]

Just have to get through this work day and it's a 3 day weekend, I can do this...just have to stay focused

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G930A using Tapatalk

[Icare dixit]

I will make a plan for recovery. Determination and will have been lacking, lately. I'm used to strong ambivalence and continuous shifts of focus but this is much better.

I'm getting slowly used to living without continuous and severe mania or depression (whether it's mixed or longer stretches). All it takes is time and a little bit of effort. It's like adjusting your eyes to sudden darkness. But there's an improvement in the speed of that adjustment.

Depression has become child's play.

I think that considering the many years I lived with continuous severe mood changes and non-affective constant and mild delusions, I've recovered a great deal.

I just have to make a plan with steps to really make it all materialise.

[bizi]

Originally Posted by Icare dixit

I will make a plan for recovery. Determination and will have been lacking, lately. I'm used to strong ambivalence and continuous shifts of focus but this is much better.

I'm getting slowly used to living without continuous and severe mania or depression (whether it's mixed or longer stretches). All it takes is time and a little bit of effort. It's like adjusting your eyes to sudden darkness. But there's an improvement in the speed of that adjustment.

Depression has become child's play.

I think that considering the many years I lived with continuous severe mood changes and non-affective constant and mild delusions, I've recovered a great deal.

I just have to make a plan with steps to really make it all materialise.

and your pdoc knows that you go thru such mood swings? Do you have emergency meds to take?
bizi

[Icare dixit]

Originally Posted by bizi

and your pdoc knows that you go thru such mood swings? Do you have emergency meds to take?
bizi

My mood really changes very rapidly, so I do sleep and thanks to my antipsychotic there's "only" a difference of 4 hours maximum before I can or will sleep. It's fear of depression the next day and the not knowing whether I will be depressed and how much sleep I need that is my biggest problem.

I've had these mood changes for really a long time, almost a decade, sometimes more severe sometimes less so, sometimes, interrupted by long stretches of mania, a more severe mixed state and depression, once every three years or so.

My perception changes less severely than my mood, since I consistently take the prescribed dosage of my antipsychotic, so that allows me to keep some focus and determination.

Long story short, there is improvement so I don't feel the need or desire to end my life and my mood states are short so even though I want it to end, my mood changes before this need I feel gets too intense. I also don't mind suffering much. I still have difficulties with stability.

My psychiatrist does know about this, but if I really can't take it anymore I'd go straight to a hospital. I don't take any meds in such a state of mind because I might keep taking them. I'm afraid of meds in such a state, being at one or the other extreme. There are many hospitals where I live. I'd go to one just to feel safer, but I stay outside.

This has always worked for me.

Thanks for reading and making sure I'm alright. I am doing quite alright and I'm open about these and any problems and my psychiatrist doesn't underestimate the severity. But I'm pretty good at just experiencing and not panicking. That's all it takes really.

[Icare dixit]

Anyone knows a good way to remove blood stains? I could ask in the supermarket but I thought some things might work better than others. They just don't seem to go away. Thin cotton fabric.

[Rjaye]

Have you tried hydrogen peroxide?

[Icare dixit]

Originally Posted by Rjaye

Have you tried hydrogen peroxide?

No, but does it work? This fabric is really thin and dyed. Wouldn't that be a problem? I guess it would be, right? I don't want it discoloured (more than it is).

[Icare dixit]

It seemed to have disappeared. Whatever the reason, I'm glad. Maybe I could've just ignored it. I don't know and I don't care.

Still debating what to do. Mentally imploding but so immobilized. Overwhelmed despair mostly, but surges of agitated desperation to make it all stop. The visions this brings on would not succeed.

It would be up to me to go in. Literally, not just choosing whether or not to go. Getting on the bus, walking in, having to talk. I don't know.

Trying to distract myself.

Avoiding dealing with triggering things, because they would set off the agitation. It'd make the decision more clear, but high potential for calamity. It's all already more than I can handle.

Starting a thread would be futile, because there are so many aspects I can't bring myself to talk about.

Sorry. I should shut up already.

[Nammu]

Fustrated

[Gabyunbound]

Got through the nasty case of flu and now falling back into being as depressed as pre-sickness. While sick my mind was utterly blank, if anything full of the puffy-cotton of fever and I slept all the time. I missed work with a 'good' non-MI excuse. I miss the flu.

I'm much better today. I really fell apart the last few days and it wasn't pleasant. I scared myself. I scared my loved ones. I pretty much have my hypo/mania under control but it is the depression that returns again each year at this time.

My itching is getting bad again. Can't handle much more and the meds aren't helping. I'm sleeping a lot. At least I can sleep. Mood goes up and down depending on the amount of itching I'm experiencing. I hope this goes away fast.

[Standup2me]

Originally Posted by ElsaMars

My itching is getting bad again. Can't handle much more and the meds aren't helping. I'm sleeping a lot. At least I can sleep. Mood goes up and down depending on the amount of itching I'm experiencing. I hope this goes away fast.

Gold Bond powder and Gold Bond cream
It really does work

[Blaire]

Originally Posted by Gabyunbound

Got through the nasty case of flu and now falling back into being as depressed as pre-sickness. While sick my mind was utterly blank, if anything full of the puffy-cotton of fever and I slept all the time. I missed work with a 'good' non-MI excuse. I miss the flu.

Yeah, I like physical illness, even injury, because it feels so legitimate. I feel like others understand and accept it. It's so much easier than being horribly sick with something no one can "see" and many people think you're just imagining. I have a very hard time with stigma and judgment. Hopefully I'll get over it someday, but right now I feel so guilty and insecure about my illness.

Today was very rough in the morning, but the extra Seroquel worked wonders, and the rest of the day has been much better.

[gina_re]

Got back home not too long ago and I got to hold my new nephew again!! Oh he's so cute! He was being a little fussy, but he's my big little nephew! What a great end to a stressful week!

[UpDownMiddleGround]

I woke up in this weird state this morning. I slept for maybe 5 hours, which is less than my pdoc wants me to sleep. I was still tired when I woke up but I couldn't fall back asleep. I woke up anxious and worried about things that I don't even know are really problems. They just seem to be this morning. I have cried about three times this morning already - either from reading a touching post or just simply because. I'm not sure that I understand mood. I feel neutral but there is all of this stuff that is happening.

[Victoria'smom]

I feel fantastic!! I would go out running if I could.

having memory issues again.

and i'm letting it get on top of me- and it's certainly affected my mood in general

all this over a comedian.... wow. what has it come too

in other news- i've been looking for a region 2 dvd of something on amazon, and everyone i message about it say... oh, my copy is region 1. blah

but yay listening to music.. always a plus