Questions: Bipolar Version 2

I seem to here but it was odd in person once

What's your favorite color?

Green... sage green to be more specific.

What is your favorite animal?

Penguin

What's your usual bedtime?

11 pm

Do you eat breakfast?

No. I sleep too late.

Do you skip meals when depressed?

Yes I do.

Do you skip meals when manic?

Totally, I am just not hungry or interested in food.

When was the last time you were manic?

Spring 2015. Then I was mixed for months and then very depressed for many months. I've had some no problem short hypos but clozaril is really effective with mania for me. I can't believe it's been a year since I was mixed (maybe 10 months. I think I was mixed when I was admitted in February but I'd need someone else to tell me that). I never thought I'd be able to say this. and only few not so horrible depressions. Amazing drug cocktail finally. 14 years in the making.

Do you spend more time manic, hypo, mixed or depressed?

Most time is spent mixed. Horrible state of being.

How much time per year do you spend stable?

A month here or there.

What's the hardest part of the year for your bipolar

Summer.

Do you feel shame for all you've said and done when manic or in general (when you also have BPD )?

I used to, but I have let a lot of that go.

Have you ever had a "good" hospital stay that you can remember?

All of my hospital stays have been good really. Every time I'e gotten the treatment I needed for whatever was going on and where I go is a good place. I've had bad moments a few times and had a few staff members I didn't like but both were gone the last time I was there. I think of the hosptial as a safe place and if I have to go again someday then I'm fine with that (while being VERY fine with never going back again ever!).

Who is the worst staff person you've encountered IP and why?

Oh god so many! Just the incessant whining. It's different than people just asking for help. It's just the same things over and over again, and when you're there people are trying to help but they keep beating the same issue with a stick and not listening. Eh, thank god I am not IP anymore.

Do you have many bipolar friends?

No. I've only met one other person with BP in real life (who wasn't my patient and that does not count) and that was when I was IP.

How do you distract yourself when you are upset?

hah I want to answer this too (if you don't mind)

a woman obsessed with mannors

i'll always remember this.. she was beating it in to this lady yvonne, well, yvonne, if you don't say please, and you keep being angry, none of us are going to help you

and she wouldn't get anything she asked for unless she spoke to staff like they were royalty

mannors are good, but sheesh. their is a limit

I like to take what ever's making me upset, and restart it.

if for example, i'm upset by the end of a tv show, i'll restart it from the beginning and watch it it all again (or at least until i'm not upset about it), or maybe i'm upset about someone dying, in which case I talk to someone online about it

or.. maybe the end of an event. i'll recreate it in my own way writing about it or planning another one.

question: have you ever used so much physical violence on someone else, that had to be hospitalised?
(by accident, of course)

If I remember correctly she had to go to hospital, maybe for stitches but I don't remember (I was very young). It was a head injury. After that I feared myself. Not because of the violence, but for losing control, not thinking straight, acting irrationally and having strong contradictory beliefs in quick succession, overconfidence, jealousy, excess (obviously not just at that moment, but it was a defining moment). But I want all that back (not the violence). I got my personality back at one time, after about 7 years, but it ended in a situation I'm still recovering from and I don't know whether I should or whether I want to.

Are you more (often) depressed when you wake up or at the end of the day?

When I wakeup...big time. Do you do new years resolutions?

Maybe I should: no more regular cigarettes, just the e-cigarette and taking the supplements I need if I want to avoid cardiovascular and increasingly severe mental issues.

Are you religious?

Yes, I am religious. It is a real mix of faiths though.

Do you enjoy exotic foods or strictly meat and potatoes?

I don't eat bugs or duck embryos no.

Will you be attending church on Christmas?

No. Just seeing family.

What is the best Christmas you have ever had?

Any Christmas before I had a bipolar diagnosis.

Are you getting anxious now that Christmas is approaching?

I just want it over all ready.

I really don't see the big fuss seeing as i'm on my own, i've no family or friends to wish me happy christmas, i'm buying my own gifts, i'll just binge my way through it probably (which I all ready started doing)

my anxiety about christmas has turned to anger/ depression/ frustration.
who is the nicest member of hospital staff you have encountered?. (either IP or otherwise)