[bizi]

Originally Posted by TheHPEnthusiast1987

Hey,
Had a decent night at work. Just found out my therapist is leaving the company he works for. Guess I'm back to the drawing board. My current therapist said that he has info to give me of another guy he knows. I don't understand why I can't just talk to one of the other counselors where he is. The physical therapy is working pretty well for me though. I only have two more sessions to go through before I'm done. I have to say I didn't want it to be over so soon. I was sort nervous about doing it since I'm just going for walking, but now that I'm doing it. It really helps. Well, until next time.

YOu can stay where you are and get a new therapist, maybe he knows the one he recommended might be a better fit for you?
don't know...could you ask him?
bizi

[Tucson]

For the first time, I have gone to the gym and worked out. I want to make this part of a regular routine.

[Naynay99]

I dont know how i am.
I feel like conceding, waving the white flag and telling the depression that it wins. i am done. i want off this ride.
But i am forced to keep going, and i am so tired.

[VerMOZZica]

Upset and disappointed today.Upset because I was impulsive and spent too much money and disappointed cause there was something I wanted to do and it just didn`t work out.

[Nammu]

Someone here used the word bleak, that's a good word for where I'm at, low energy no real interest just breathing from day to day cause that's what the body does.

most of this week was the same as any other week (no sleep, very little to no motivation, etc)

I did have my first (and only),telephone mentoring session with a girl who also suffers with bipolar

actually, it was refreshing to talk to her, someone who actually understood and got it

talked for at least an hour, she's very good as well because she manages it really well and I told her that's great, maybe 1 day i'll be like you.

but anyway not much else really happened this week

but why would it

this is my life we're talking about

[Sunflower123]

Originally Posted by Sometimes psychotic

My pdoc said be careful with light boxes they can make you manic.....

Yes he has told me that as well about some of his patients but I am bp2 with mainly depressive episodes. I am also very sensitive to lack of light so I have to use it 9 months of the year.

[scatterbrained04]

Originally Posted by Naynay99

I dont know how i am.
I feel like conceding, waving the white flag and telling the depression that it wins. i am done. i want off this ride.
But i am forced to keep going, and i am so tired.

Right there with you. We must keep going ((((hugs))))

[rwwff]

Sleep got all messed up last night, 3 hrs, 3 very light, mostly awake hours. I think its just the process of getting used to the abilify, but I hate this feeling of sensing the physical exhaustion in joints and muscle, and knowing there is no way in heck the brain will let me rest today...

[Sunflower123]

I asked my therapist whether in her opinion my ups and downs were coming from a chemical imbalance or from several severe traumas in my life. She said a lot of my pain comes from the traumas although she in no way denigrated the chemical imbalance. I've always wondered about this. I am willing and eager to work on healing these traumas so I feel hopeful right now.

[bizi]

Originally Posted by Jennifer 1967

I asked my therapist whether in her opinion my ups and downs were coming from a chemical imbalance or from several severe traumas in my life. She said a lot of my pain comes from the traumas although she in no way denigrated the chemical imbalance. I've always wondered about this. I am willing and eager to work on healing these traumas so I feel hopeful right now.

good luck jennifer.
Therapy can do wonders.
((((HUGS))))
bizi

[Wander]

TRIGGER WARNING ⚠️

Saw my T and pdoc today. Both ere worried about me so I have been put on closer observations. Had a great, helpful chat with my T who helped me see through the fog of depression. Still, I can't think clearly, have a plan and am close yo going through with it. My T even walked me out to my Dads car, who picked me up, to make sure I didn't do s runner. This is the first time he has ever done this. He also contacted my pdoc to update him.

My pdoc was equally as compassionate band explained why I am on so many meds. He promised to cut back once I'm stable. For now he has decreased Lithium (.i was toxic), stopped Ritalin and added an AD, fluoxetine- Prozac. aD have made me hypomanic before so they are going to keel a close eye on me.

Right now I am on sodium Valproate 400mg, Lithium 27759mg, Abilify 30mg. Seroquel 400mg Fluoxetine 20mg and benzodiazepines. Easy too u have but I'm having no side effects except hand tremors so that's good. Each is ding a specific job.

[xRavenx]

I'm struggling. I feel very anxious, feeling it physically and emotionally, like I'm just sick. I think im either feeling the bad type of hypo with irritability or possibly mixed. I'm very impulsive. My mind is full of ideas. Things are beginning to spin around. There's certain decisions I feel I might make based on my state of mind because I can't turn off the thoughts. Things are getting worse in a different kind of way. I keep spending money.
I ask am I just treating myself to things? But all the signs are there that I'm not well, barely functioning. Sometimes I feel I've tried everything. I just can't take it with all this. It's like a curse...I think im cycling. There were a few days of true hypo...now it's just getting worse, but it's definitely more on the manic side.

[Moose72]

I still feel paranoid that people are out to get me. However, its not a constant thing, so that's good. It comes and goes. I see my pdoc Monday morning for a regular check-in, but I don't want to tell her about the paranoia because I know she will want to up the zyprexa again and I want to go DOWN. I can't stand all this down, up, down, up. I want to be DONE with it already!

In a couple hours, my ex husband and my friend are showing up (separately). My ex is picking up our youngest and my friend is here to go do fun things like eat at Texas Roadhouse and go to a hottub place.

I've had a heck of a time with my apartment that last few days because there's a big crack in my bedroom ceiling- water is pooling from the roof! They are going to fix it next week. I hope they do before it breaks open!

My mom will be back from Disney World today and Tuesday we are sharing our birthday presents for each other. I got her a neat book on Walt Disney- of course!

[xRavenx]

Originally Posted by Moose72

I still feel paranoid that people are out to get me. However, its not a constant thing, so that's good. It comes and goes. I see my pdoc Monday morning for a regular check-in, but I don't want to tell her about the paranoia because I know she will want to up the zyprexa again and I want to go DOWN. I can't stand all this down, up, down, up. I want to be DONE with it already!

In a couple hours, my ex husband and my friend are showing up (separately). My ex is picking up our youngest and my friend is here to go do fun things like eat at Texas Roadhouse and go to a hottub place.

I've had a heck of a time with my apartment that last few days because there's a big crack in my bedroom ceiling- water is pooling from the roof! They are going to fix it next week. I hope they do before it breaks open!

My mom will be back from Disney World today and Tuesday we are sharing our birthday presents for each other. I got her a neat book on Walt Disney- of course!

(((Hugs))) I can to totally relate to the up and down thing. I've been going that for about a year. I got tired of side effects with a few, lowered the meds slightly, and I'm trying to push through. I hope you feel better soon

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by xRavenx

(((Hugs))) I can to totally relate to the up and down thing. I've been going that for about a year. I got tired of side effects with a few, lowered the meds slightly, and I'm trying to push through. I hope you feel better soon

Yup. And if I told her about the paranoia, she'd up that zyprexa so fast both our heads would spin!

[AmandaBroken]

Doing Okay...

[hopeless2015]

Still sick, went to Dr Monday and she just told me to quit smoking and is sending me to pulmonary specialist, that appointment isn't until may. O haven't had a cig since Thursday and I'm still coughing my head off. Thinking about you g to convenient care, but will they just blame everything on the smoking to? I just want to feel better.

[scatterbrained04]

Not sure what to do with myself. Felt good this morning, so I cleaned my kitchen pretty good. Then I started to feel kind of crappy. I should probably clean more. I don't want to. But I feel like otherwise I'd lay in bed. But I have too much energy for that. Can't concentrate too well, so reading is out. Still feeling self-destructive. Lots of inner tension.

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by hopeless2015

Still sick, went to Dr Monday and she just told me to quit smoking and is sending me to pulmonary specialist, that appointment isn't until may. O haven't had a cig since Thursday and I'm still coughing my head off. Thinking about you g to convenient care, but will they just blame everything on the smoking to? I just want to feel better.

Smoking is the easy answer. Maybe you have bronchitis too? Do you have asthma? That can make things worse.

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by scatterbrained04

Not sure what to do with myself. Felt good this morning, so I cleaned my kitchen pretty good. Then I started to feel kind of crappy. I should probably clean more. I don't want to. But I feel like otherwise I'd lay in bed. But I have too much energy for that. Can't concentrate too well, so reading is out. Still feeling self-destructive. Lots of inner tension.

Can you go for a walk around the block? (Or whatever you have.)

[Takeshi]

Originally Posted by AmandaBroken

Doing Okay...

That, that is a nice pedicure. Pardon me, I don't do introduction.

I'm good by the way. This'll be for a former friend of mine, I hope she'll be around.

https://forums.psychcentral.com/coff...om-quotes.html

Your life vs real doctor, think about what you said to me, and a word of advice?

Don't be afraid of being afraid. Bye.

ETA: Back for a bit. A wise man told me that holdin' a grudge. Is like lettin' somebody just live inside of your head rent free, this is a 5'9's line, but I feel like 6'8, I let **** go quick.



Me takes no instructions, I remember a former dear someone on schizo forum, a very wise young man, he,,,he's gone through a lot, a super smart guy, I'd walk into a construction site barefooted for him, if that means anything. I wonder what would C, Be.

[AmandaBroken]

Originally Posted by Takeshi

That, that is a nice pedicure. Pardon me, I don't do introduction.

I'm good by the way. This'll be for a former friend of mine, I hope she'll be around.

https://forums.psychcentral.com/coff...om-quotes.html

Your life vs real doctor, think about what you said to me, and a word of advice?

Don't be afraid of being afraid. Bye.

That makes absolutely no sense at all...

[Sunflower123]

Originally Posted by AmandaBroken

That makes absolutely no sense at all...

Amanda, I'm glad you just said that. I was just looking at that post and shaking my head wandering what was wrong with ME because I just don't get it.

[AmandaBroken]

Originally Posted by Jennifer 1967

Amanda, I'm glad you just said that. I was just looking at that post and shaking my head wandering what was wrong with ME because I just don't get it.

Hi Jennifer...

It mystified me too. I even went to the link and still it made no sense...