Originally Posted by Scooter9

So it looks like i can't post my book title and link since it might be considered advertising, which is understandable.

Do you have a blog outside of PC? I believe PC still lets people share external blog addresses. There is a sticky in this forum for sharing blog addresses. You would definitely be able to advertise your book as you like on an external blog. In fact, that's where many people advertise a variety of things. I can't imagine PC doesn't want me to write the words "external blog".

[Scooter9]

Originally Posted by BirdDancer

Do you have a blog outside of PC? I believe PC still lets people share external blog addresses. There is a sticky in this forum for sharing blog addresses. You would definitely be able to advertise your book as you like on an external blog. In fact, that's where many people advertise a variety of things. I can't imagine PC doesn't want me to write the words "external blog".

I have a blog yeah. I might just do that! Thanks @BirdDancer

Went to psychiatrist's today. No med change, I go back in 3 months. It is what it is.

[wildflowerchild25]

Hello all. Haven’t updated in a couple days, mainly because there hasn’t been much to say. My back is healing nicely; I had intense pain over the weekend, I think due to inflammation and muscle spasms because as soon as I took Advil and flexeral the pain went away. Now I just have pain around the incision. I went for two walks yesterday, a short five minute one and a longer ten minute one with RS. The ten minute walk wore me out for sure. I have to work on getting my legs stronger as my doctor has me scheduled to tentatively go back to work in two weeks. Initially he had said six weeks so I’m not sure why he changed it to four but I don’t mind as long as I’m strong enough. I’d rather be at work. I still am technically not supposed to drive until I see him on Friday but I’ve been sneaking out. I just can’t stand to be holed up in the house. My mom would be upset with me for not following dr orders so I go when she’s at work. Imagine that, I’m nearly 32 years old and still sneaking around my mom! It’s pathetic really. But I don’t want to deal with her. I still have trouble climbing stairs. It’s going to be a long time before I can see my therapist in person because she has a big staircase leading up to her office and no elevator. But she’s been doing virtual sessions with me so I still “see” her.

RS and I are doing great. He’s been such a help through all this. He takes the trash out for me and picks up things in my room that I can’t reach because I’m not suppose to bend over and stuff like that. He’s been my rock. I’m so happy that I found him. He is so much better for me than my ex ever was.

My birthday is tomorrow and I’m super excited to go get my red velvet cheesecake from the Cheesecake Factory! I only go there on my birthday because it’s so expensive and the wait is so long. On a Thursday night it shouldn’t be too bad though. I hope anyway. Other than that I don’t care about my birthday too much. My SIL and BIL are coming up on Saturday and we’re going to go to a new bar and grill for my birthday as well. Should be fun. I’m going to miss the punk rock flea market though because I can’t walk around for hours yet. I’m a little disappointed but maybe next year.

Moodwise I’m doing well! It’s officially spring and I’m so happy I can say I made it through winter with only two short, relatively mild depressive episodes. One ten days and the other only seven. That’s amazing! Still no sign of spring hypomania which is a good thing because even though it’s fun the crash is no fun at all. I’m also coming up on one year hospital free! My record since this ******** started is 2.5 years so I’m gonna try to beat that.

Hugs to all who need them!

wildflowerchild25, happy birthday in advance! I hope your back heals quickly and you enjoy that cake.

Early happy birthday, WildFlowerChild25! Glad to hear your boyfriend is so helpful. That really makes a difference. Enjoy your cheesecake!

I don't have much news. Piano is not going well. It snowed over the weekend and i was speechless. My mood continues low. I got out for lunch today, which was nice. Is anybody else getting a new look to their interface here? I like it -- more attractive and modern.

Hugs to all who need them!

[Sunflower123]

Happy early birthday wildflowerchild25! I hope you have a wonderful day tomorrow.

I’m checking in. Not much to report...sat in the sun enjoying the weather most of the day. Celebrating my brother’s birthday tonight.

Warm wishes and hugs to all.

[Scooter9]

Originally Posted by wildflowerchild25

Other than that I don’t care about my birthday too much.

Don't say that... You're 32 only once in your life. I turned 30 over 20 years ago and recall saying something similar at the time to myself (that it doesn't matter).

I wish I could go back and realize how special that moment was and how things will never be quite the same.

Enjoy your day, the cake, your son, and your boyfriend. Take lots of photos and make memories, you'll be glad you did.

Happy birthday! 😊

[GoldenSnitch]

Happy birthday wildflowerchild!!

I had a better day today than yesterday but I’m super stressed about waiting for my disability claim to be approved at work. T said I should consider hospitalization again.

[Wander]

Originally Posted by bizi

@Wander
Glad that your therapist has your back!
How often are you going?
bizi

Thanks Bizi. I’m going weekly. He’s my usual T who happens to have a specialty in PTSD., It’s great because I already have a strong bond with him. So I feel as safe I I can right now while talking with him. He’s treated me in the past with Complex PTSD from childhood trauma and I recovered. I have been over that for five years now. So I have a lot of practical skills already too which is great.

[LadyShadow]

Had some bad news - My T of 12 years got really sick and has decided to go into retirement. I didn't even get a proper goodbye and its really tearing me apart. I think I will buy him a card and write a letter and hope they give it to him.

On a good note, I saw my good friend of 20 years today. It was good to hang out with her, I hadn't seen her in a while. We had wine, Taco Bell, and played Mario Kart. It was nice seeing her place, she really redecorated. Also, we watched the new Amy Schumer comedy special on Netflix and had a few really good laughs.

I guess everyone moves on in life, I just have to make due with a new therapist.

[bizi]

@Brentus

how is it going? what did you want to happen?Any way to ask for a change like call his office and request a change if that is what you wanted????
just guessing here.
how are you doing?
bizi

[bizi]

Originally Posted by Jennifer 1967

I’m having a good day today. I was trying to get my mom to her MRI on time and was an hour and a half late because a connecting bridge right at the 75-24 split collapsed. That’s a major thoroughfare and traffic is snarled all over town. No one was hurt, thank goodness, but it will be one heck of a headache for weeks or months to come. Just SMH. Our infrastructure could use a little help preferably before somebody gets killed.

I woke up feeling productive and motivated yesterday and knocked out several items on my to do list. Woke up motivated again today. it’s nice. I don’t know if I mentioned it but when my pdoc put me on Trintellix over the winter, I started rapid cycling multiple times a day. I didn’t know what was going on. I’ve been off it for about two weeks now and I’ve been in an increasingly good mood.

Warm wishes and hugs to all.

nIce to hear you so positive and having a good day@!!!!
Hope you have many more to come!
bizi

[~Christina]

Happy Birthday Wild

Hope you are having a hell of a great Birthday !!!! You deserve so much happiness

[Wander]

After getting a cortisone injection last week I rested for three days as instructed then swam two days in a row. Problem was I was so anxious I swam hard and fast in choppy seas with strong currents. I have wrecked my leg again. Stupid me. Physiotherapist gave me some exercises and thinks I should avoid the injection this time. It hurts and is so uncomfortable. Guess I’ve learned my lesson.

Otherwise day has been chilled. Anxiety manageable. Computer still stuffed but I’m walking away for now as it drives me mad trying to fix it. Had a nap. Been told by Physio to rest up for a few days so I’m taking the opportunity to rest my mind as much as possible too. At least Bipolar is still at bay. I am so thankful for that.

[Scooter9]

The site looks good on mobile now!

I'm posting directly on the site for the first time in ages, I was using Tapatalk on my phone before. I might just switch to using the site directly now.

I looked at my mood chart for last month and see that I was really low for 25% of the month in total. That's up quite a bit from a few months ago. But I was on a higher dose of Modafinil then. I had to lower it due to side effects.

Not feeling too good today either but I'm having a huge, pail-sized coffee so that might lift my mood for a few hours.

LadyShadow, I think your card idea is very nice and appropriate. I'm sure it will be appreciated. I'd suggest being careful not to write anything that might make your T feel guilty for his abrupt departure. You really don't know the full circumstances. I'm sure he would like well wishes and appreciation.

My moods have not been quite right lately. I have times when I'm sort of fine, but others when I almost feel mildly depressed and others when I have short periods of extreme agitation and racing thoughts (and other mixed symptoms). I see my psychiatrist tomorrow. I definitely don't want to have my Seroquel XR dose increased, but if I'm honest and tell him I've had to take PRN Seroquel (above my regular meds) he might raise my base dose.

[bizi]

Originally Posted by BirdDancer

My moods have not been quite right lately. I have times when I'm sort of fine, but others when I almost feel mildly depressed and others when I have short periods of extreme agitation and racing thoughts (and other mixed symptoms). I see my psychiatrist tomorrow. I definitely don't want to have my Seroquel XR dose increased, but if I'm honest and tell him I've had to take PRN Seroquel (above my regular meds) he might raise my base dose.

Is the prn seroquel working for you?
bizi

Originally Posted by bizi

Is the prn seroquel working for you?
bizi

Hi bizi. When I've been taking the prn Seroquel lately, it's usually because of extreme agitation (agitation being a mild word). If I take it for that (usually 50 mg regular Seroquel), it usually does calm my agitation within about 30 minutes. That kind of dose during such times doesn't make me at all tired, though. The thing is, this agitation seems to show up at some times almost every day lately. I try to avoid taking the prn (sometimes the agitation eases without), but it's been a lot lately. Really, it's possible that a 50 mg daily increase of my daily Seroquel XR dose might be a good idea so the need for regular Seroquel prns can stop. I wouldn't normally mind, but I have been really eating a lot lately. I think the overeating is partly because of my recent mood issues, and partly because of my Seroquel XR dose. It's hard for me to lose weight taking any more than 450 mg of Seroquel XR daily. I'm now on 500 mg. It often goes up to 600 mg (or more) at times.

Usually I'm not that concerned about my weight, but it has been steadily going up up up over the past months. I am really afraid that I will eventually reach my all time high weight. When I was at that weight, my blood work was particularly bad. I don't want to get diabetes. My sister got diabetes. Diabetes is common in my family.

[bizi]

I understand where you are coming from. Read my thread if you wish. I stated taking 5 mg of zyprexa at night a year ago. It helps with sleep.
I don't think that contributed with my weight gain, also going thru menapause does not help either.
good luck with your diet.
bizi

Originally Posted by bizi

@Brentus

how is it going? what did you want to happen?Any way to ask for a change like call his office and request a change if that is what you wanted????
just guessing here.
how are you doing?
bizi

@bizi It's nothing like that -- I'm just a little disillusioned when it comes to medicine and it's efficacy. It's doing all it can. I'm just not where I want to be I guess. It's not even something the psychiatrist is a part of.

Still looking for a new job. It's pretty bleak. There's really only been 2 I'd even have a shot at in all the weeks I've been looking (not including jobs I have absolutely no interest in -- like yeah, I could probably be a dishwasher, but I don't want to be completely exhausted and not be able to do life things. I've done it before, but I was decades younger then. Also, not jobs too far away to be practical. And have to be transit accessible. And not require a car. It's not that I'm not overly fussy, I just know my physical and psychological limitations. And I have very few in-demand skills. I'm a really hard worker, but it's hard to get in the door.).

But I finally DID download a word processing program (LibreOffice) and updated my resumé (minor change). (I had downloaded another, but it was useless (Bean). Like, it couldn't even center(!!). Sure, the choice was there, but all it did was put it all over the place. So into the trash that one went!

I'm also cleaning up my room today. It's a big mess. Things have been sliding and indifference is considerable. Might be somewhat depressed. But it's probably situational.

And I need to do something creative, or I will die. (Not physically, but mentally.)

[Wander]

That’s a tough situation. I have no advice I can think would help, but I can see you’re working your bit off. Keep fighting and hopefully a decent job will come along. Even start at dishwashing if you desperately need the cash right now. Then you can keep looking and work from there. I wish you the best of luck.

[Wander]

Woke up at 6.30 am. Still, I finally got a great sleep due to 12.5mg of Seroquel. Now I’m smoking and drinking coffee to wake up. Have to get my nephew a present today for the family get together tomorrow. He is autistic so it’s really tough as he wants nothing and is really picky. He will be 13. I’m going to make a card and put some money in it as that’s the only thing he will love.

Not anxious so far which is great. I usually wake up anxious. Hope the day continues like this. Trauma therapy must be helping. Although I’ve only just started and have much worse things to speak about.