[wildflowerchild25]

Nearly started crying about two hours ago. I felt like **** mentally when I woke up and I tried to suck it up for work but my student is in rare form today. Verbal abuse, defiance, threats....just before lunch break he began cursing at me and threatening me. Seriously, any other day, any other time, I’m fine with it. I don’t even care. I just chalk it up to the kid’s dx and move on. But I left for lunch and I was nearly in tears. I thought spending a half hour by myself would reset some but no, I only felt worse when my break was up. I truly felt like I was going to break down in a crying heap if I had to face him again.

Thankfully, my team is very supportive. I went straight to the floor supervisor and told her I absolutely cannot handle him for the rest of the day. Switch me out, PLEASE. She took me to our assistant director and explained, and the assistant director made some staff changes so I could spend the rest of the day away from him. It’s nearly the end of school now, and I managed to survive.

The depression is not abating yet, but it’s only been four days. It feels like forever though. It’s only intensifying. Starting to get the images here and there. Definitely SH urges.

[Moose72]

My mom and N3 and I got everything finished as far as N3 is concerned. My mom and I got the kitchen packed. Turns out I have extras of cleaning supplies so my mom is going to store them for me in her basement. She went home to eat lunch and take a nap but is coming back later when we will tackle under the bathroom sink! I already went through it to get rid of stuff- now I need to pack what's left. We have a week and a day to be 100% teady to move!

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by wildflowerchild25

Nearly started crying about two hours ago. I felt like **** mentally when I woke up and I tried to suck it up for work but my student is in rare form today. Verbal abuse, defiance, threats....just before lunch break he began cursing at me and threatening me. Seriously, any other day, any other time, I’m fine with it. I don’t even care. I just chalk it up to the kid’s dx and move on. But I left for lunch and I was nearly in tears. I thought spending a half hour by myself would reset some but no, I only felt worse when my break was up. I truly felt like I was going to break down in a crying heap if I had to face him again.

Thankfully, my team is very supportive. I went straight to the floor supervisor and told her I absolutely cannot handle him for the rest of the day. Switch me out, PLEASE. She took me to our assistant director and explained, and the assistant director made some staff changes so I could spend the rest of the day away from him. It’s nearly the end of school now, and I managed to survive.

The depression is not abating yet, but it’s only been four days. It feels like forever though. It’s only intensifying. Starting to get the images here and there. Definitely SH urges.

Sorry that student was wearing you down and glad you got switched to do something else without him.

I hope the SH urges are nothing you're going to act on.

[*Beth*]

Originally Posted by Living in LaLa Land

I'm really tired of the 100 degree days. I want actual Fall weather. I'm a Philly native transplant to L.A. and Fall's my favorite season. It's disheartening not to have an actual Fall.

That's rough. There's basically no Fall in L.A. We used to have pretty nice Falls up here, but since these overwhelming fires it's all different. Instead of the trees turning pretty colors they mostly just turn brownish. And of course, there are still 6 weeks of warm/hot weather and fire watch.

[Mountaindewed]

I guess the preop appointment went ok today. He wasn’t quite as friendly as he was last time which freaked me out a bit and made me think he didn’t want to do the surgery or work with me in general. I think a lot of doctors are just tired and feeling a bit burned out. I’m trying not to take it personally but it’s tough. He says I am really big so I’m gonna need a really involved mastectomy with grafts that may or may not take. He says the biggest risk for me is if the grafts take and he says I’m gonna be in his office “a lot” whatever that means. But it’s still going to be an outpatient surgery with an easy recovery time and I told him I do not want to be on opiates and he was totally cool with that.

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by Soupe du jour

That's what we're thinking. It will just be middle-aged Hubby and me and occasionally his lawyer friend who goes between the US and Brno a week out of every month. And, maybe a couple of parrots, once we get settled.

The house owners have three kids, so the house clearly shows that. Plus, they were a very messy/cluttery lot! They still need to empty the garage, attic, and parts of the patio of their stuff (some is junk). The whole house needs a good scrubbing and the bedroom we would want as the master was the kids', so would need to be "de-kiddified" (scrap the cartoon theme). They now live a few houses down the road. One patch of green would make for a nice little herb and veggie garden and others for flowers. We were told they raised turkeys there. Not our plan 😁, even though we obviously like birds.

The views are beautiful hilly Moravian countryside with village homes in the distance. Down the road is an old Moravian Catholic church. Further down is a horse riding farm. [Beautiful horses!] Bike paths are everywhere, and there are forests to explore (all public access), and a tennis court nearby for free public use. It would normally take 20 mins to Brno, but there is road construction to widen the highway...which will eventually be helpful. Bus within walking-distance. Tram to Brno from bus ride. The village name translates to "Nut Tree", which is cute.

Sounds like a wonderful place, Taking care of changing the kids stuff out,, That would sure make it feel more like " you're home" Sounds like a lovely place with so many options for getting around and nature..

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by Jennifer 1967

The situation that was causing so much anxiety has resolved itself after two months in the best possible way. I feel like an anchor has been removed from my chest. Very, very grateful.

I slept 10 hours last night. Very grateful for that also.

I really appreciate the support. Thank you.

Fantastic !!!!

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

Good morning! Woke up early for the first time in a long time. Went to the pharmacy to pick up one of my meds and bought some chamomile lavender tea, dark chocolate, and dark roast coffee. The coffee is for when my sister visits. This whole time I thought I wasn't allowed to have visitors in my apartment complex due to covid but I was totally wrong, got that cleared up with the supportive housing care manager the other day. So I can finally have my sister over. We'll have danish butter cookies and coffee while we talk. It will be nice to show her the pictures I got hung up and the fall decor in my apartment. It's not much but it's starting to look more like a home.

My anxiety has gotten much better. I still have panic attacks every now and then but I don't feel that constant dread feeling in my chest anymore.

I'm trying to get into a better sleep routine (getting up early) cause I have a bad habit of sleeping half the day and ignoring my alarms. I just feel better when I get up early for some reason. I used to be a morning person but that changed with meds.

The weather is a lot cooler. I'm loving it.

Anyway, I hope everyone has a lovely day and happy fall!

So happy to see you doing so well

[~Christina]

I'm really enjoying this cooler weather. Its not sunny today but that's okay I still do not need the AC running ..

My body is adjusting to the Seroquel, I don't have the hand tremor, much at all thank fully, That was getting on my nerves but the Cogentin has taking care of most of that.

I'm really enjoying my painting, Its calming, Altho I think it looks terrible ( expected, I'm my worst critic) Steve assures me it looks great.

Speaking of Steve .. He's finally back on his feet He's been working outside daily since Saturday, He's almost finished adding the final touches to the porch. He is having to take breaks often to catch his breath.. If it were another sunny day he will have finished the last bit of painting on the side steps, He finished the stain yesterday. But hopefully tomorrow will be sunny and he can get it all done with.

Hope everyone is having a good day

[Nammu]

Oh yay! So glad things have turned around for you and Steve! It’s about time. Give the dogs a cuddle from me.

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by Nammu

Oh yay! So glad things have turned around for you and Steve! It’s about time. Give the dogs a cuddle from me.

Thanks ! Yes this has been a looooong haul with him so sick..

Earlier my one dog Sirius came running out of the bedroom across the living room at full speed and jumped on my lap He forgets he's 65-70 lbs .. LOL Hes such a dork Meanwhile our other Dog Dexter just watched with such a bored expression, He is not one that likes to jump in laps thankfully ,, Hes 65-70 lbs too LOL

Is Sir treating you well???

[Moose72]

Well my mom came over again and I'm now mostly packed! This weekend, people are coming for the organ, piano and washing machine.

[wildflowerchild25]

I got home and collapsed in bed. I was so physically and mentally exhausted. All I could think about was SH and the big S. I just needed to be alone in a ball on my bed so I wouldn’t do anything crazy. I turned Seinfeld on for background noise and closed my eyes. I’m not sure if I fell asleep, but at least I could breathe when RS came home. I couldn’t bring myself to make dinner so we had fast food. Oh well.

Good news is my student is suspended for the next two days for all the threats he made. So even if I continue feeling like **** at least I won’t have to deal with constant abuse. We have Monday off so maybe by Tuesday I’ll be refreshed and out of this funk.

[Nammu]

Originally Posted by ~Christina

Thanks ! Yes this has been a looooong haul with him so sick..

Earlier my one dog Sirius came running out of the bedroom across the living room at full speed and jumped on my lap He forgets he's 65-70 lbs .. LOL Hes such a dork Meanwhile our other Dog Dexter just watched with such a bored expression, He is not one that likes to jump in laps thankfully ,, Hes 65-70 lbs too LOL

Is Sir treating you well???

Sir is laying on the recliner foot after having his 5 0’clock meal, treat and water! He’s king of all.

[otroo]

Been a really good productive day. I ran all my errands then I fixed the cruise control on my suv. Cost $14 vs the $200 the shop wanted. I also washed the motorcycles and put a ceramic coating on them. Good overall day and nope I don't feel manic lol.

[Scooter9]

Our family friend has been moved to palliative care. A hospice wasn't available.

They're keeping him comfortable.

[bpcyclist]

First real rain today. Feeling a little sad. We need it, obviously. I have just had so many years od fall-winter depression and I tend to get quite frightened this time of year. Waiting.

Maybe it will be okay this year.

[Victoria'smom]

I only randomly cried once today. I had a piece of pizza. I switched most of my soda over to strawberry lemonade twist. I made an appointment with my pdoc (big deal for me). My CP is getting worse. My depression is still light enough that I can function okay. My husband is getting sick of cooking for us. So I have to start picking up slack. I'd just rather not eat then cook. We'll see. I guess.

[Polibeth]

Our whole household had to get tested for COVID after husband came down with fever and cough. I cannot go to work (brand new part-time job) until we all get negative test results. I hate to miss work.

Worried about husband - his fever was 103 now it's down to 100.5 but still. Son and I feel fine.

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by Polibeth

Our whole household had to get tested for COVID after husband came down with fever and cough. I cannot go to work (brand new part-time job) until we all get negative test results. I hate to miss work.

Worried about husband - his fever was 103 now it's down to 100.5 but still. Son and I feel fine.

That sounds rough! I'm glad your husband's fever is down.

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by Nammu

Sir is laying on the recliner foot after having his 5 0’clock meal, treat and water! He’s king of all.

Well of course he is!!!! LOL

I'm sure he lets you know when your slacking

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by Polibeth

Our whole household had to get tested for COVID after husband came down with fever and cough. I cannot go to work (brand new part-time job) until we all get negative test results. I hate to miss work.

Worried about husband - his fever was 103 now it's down to 100.5 but still. Son and I feel fine.

Oh No !!! When can you get tested? Hopefully soon.

[Polibeth]

Originally Posted by ~Christina

Oh No !!! When can you get tested? Hopefully soon.

We were already tested this morning - we are fortunate that there is a drive-thru testing site 15 minutes from our house!

Now the hard part- waiting for results

[scatterbrained04]

Trying to get myself motivated for the day. I have a lot to tackle. No patients in the office today, so I plan to use the day wisely. I've been filling in a lot due to being short staffed, so my work has really piled up. It's so stressful. The unfortunate side of management lol. Our new hire we hired about 3-4 weeks ago quit last week. She had to suddenly move out of town for personal reasons. So back to interviewing. Trying my best to get sleep at least to balance the stress.

[Sunflower123]

Originally Posted by bpcyclist

First real rain today. Feeling a little sad. We need it, obviously. I have just had so many years od fall-winter depression and I tend to get quite frightened this time of year. Waiting.

Maybe it will be okay this year.

Same here. Sending best wishes and good thoughts that you escape it this year.