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#1151
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I am having a rough time of it. Fits of depression, emotional pain, and cognitive problems like having difficulty putting sentences together. I wish this would stop.
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Dx: Bipolar I, ADD, GAD. Rx: Fluoxetine, Buproprion, Olanzapine, Lamictal, and Strattera. |
![]() *Beth*, Anonymous 42424, Moose72, Nammu, Soupe du jour, Sunflower123, wildflowerchild25
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#1152
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Thanks. I did skip the pool, brr. They idea of the cold pool on my sleep deprived skin was too much. But I like the group that goes to fitness we’re all older and it’s nice to socialize a bit. There’s four of us that do both the pool and the fitness class. We all started the fitness class at the same time. They usually have coffee together but I come home between classes and eat breakfast as I’m not an mornings person and I need to eat something for the fitness classes.
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Nammu …Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …... Desiderata Max Ehrmann |
![]() *Beth*, Anonymous 42424, Soupe du jour, Sunflower123
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#1153
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![]() Nammu
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#1154
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I'm home. I'm very tired and sore. I'll share more tomorrow (and boy do I have a funny =-ish story).
Good night. Thanks so much everyone.
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Bipolar 1, PTSD, GAD, OCD. Clozapine 250 mg, Emsam 12 mg/day patch, topamax 25 mg, ,Gabapentin 1600 mg & 100-2 PRN,. 2.5 mg clonazepam., 75 mg Seroquel and 12.5 mg PRNx2 daily |
![]() *Beth*, Anonymous 42424, Anonymous41462, Moose72, Mountaindewed, MuddyBoots, Nammu, Soupe du jour, Sunflower123, Victoria'smom, wildflowerchild25
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![]() *Beth*, HALLIEBETH87, MuddyBoots, Nammu, Soupe du jour, Sunflower123, ~Christina
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#1155
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#1156
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I had the therapy session. I think she did a long session. Honestly, I'm having difficulty with time and place. Frankly, I think I've cracked up. I guess I need to ground myself? I guess I'll check around on how to do that.
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![]() Anonymous 42424, Anonymous41462, Moose72, Mountaindewed, MuddyBoots, Nammu, Soupe du jour, Sunflower123, wildflowerchild25
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#1157
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My thoughts were attacking me this morning, every painful shameful moment from the past. It was just a "Jane's Hit Parade." So i exercised to try and stop them but that didn't work. I thought a change of scenery might help so i joyrode our train. Then i went to the mall for lunch and a few groceries.
It may not sound like much, but i guess that's a lot of activity for me, after all these long quiet months of depression / COVID inertia. Well, it WAS three buses and a train. I got overwhelmed and cried after i got home. It just seems that there's no pleasure in life. I'm alive, sure, but where is the pleasure? Unfortunately, my dog, who is sweet and adorable in every other way, does not comfort me when i cry. She doesn't have any reaction. I guess i just got overwhelmed. I spent several hours sitting quietly and feel recovered now. I'll be more careful not to overdo it from now on. Happy that i exercised two days in a row tho. I'm very sore, it even hurts to type. |
![]() *Beth*, Anonymous 42424, MuddyBoots, Nammu, Soupe du jour, Sunflower123, wildflowerchild25
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#1158
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Hold ice or an ice pack Use a weighted blanket if you have one Sit in a chair and push your feet on the ground Push hard against a wall Five senses - name 5 things you can see, 4 you can hear, 3 you can touch, 2 you can smell, 1 you can taste. Or any combination thereof. Speaking of taste, my therapist told me to taste something really strong to snap back to earth, such as biting a lemon or taking a sip of vinegar. I actually use the super sour classic 90s candy, warheads lol. Counting - I have a painting on my wall that I count colors in. I’ve also done it with bricks on the sidewalk when I was triggered away from home. I haven’t tried this one yet but a social worker told me to try to spell a word backwards. I dunno if any of those will help but worth a try. In regards to losing your sense of time, I was/am in the same boat. Don’t really know which day it is or how long ago something happened. Sucks. I hope you feel better ![]()
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Of course it is happening inside your head. But why on earth should that mean that it is not real? -Albus Dumbledore That’s life. If nothing else, that is life. It’s real. Sometimes it f—-ing hurts. But it’s sort of all we have. -Garden State |
![]() *Beth*, MuddyBoots, Soupe du jour, Sunflower123
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![]() *Beth*, Moose72, MuddyBoots
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#1159
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So happy your home and the healing can begin ![]() Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
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Helping others gets me out of my own head ~ |
#1160
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Hi everyone. I was diagnosed with bipolar 2 and a few other things after the death of my brother. I'm rapid cycling and have mixed episodes, as well as, tons of anxiety, disassociation episodes, and panic attacks.
It's been a rough 8 months, and I feel very alone. I'm high functioning so its rare for most people to even notice what I go through. To be honest, I feel like I'm in my own personalized hell. I know no one going through what I am, and I feel literally crazy at times. I wanted to talk to people suffering through the same thing to better understand my disorder. |
![]() *Beth*, Anonymous 42424, Anonymous41462, MuddyBoots, Nammu, Soupe du jour, Sunflower123, wildflowerchild25
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![]() ~Christina
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#1161
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Sorry to hear you are having such a hard time, Beth. Is it the sleep deprivation that's bothering you? Hope one of WFC's suggestions helps you.
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![]() *Beth*
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![]() *Beth*, ~Christina
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#1162
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I like Wildflowerchild25's suggestions. One of my favorite things to do is to run my fingers over a brick wall, including the mortar in between. The roughness on my fingertips is calming.
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Qui Cantat Bis Orat ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 4.5 mg Risperdal .5 mg ![]() Gabapentin 300 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily |
![]() *Beth*
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![]() *Beth*
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#1163
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Of course it is happening inside your head. But why on earth should that mean that it is not real? -Albus Dumbledore That’s life. If nothing else, that is life. It’s real. Sometimes it f—-ing hurts. But it’s sort of all we have. -Garden State |
![]() Anonymous 42424, Mountaindewed
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![]() *Beth*
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#1164
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Dx: Bipolar type 1 Psych Medications: * Tegretol XR (carbamazepine ER) 800 mg * Lamictal (lamotrigine) 150 mg * Seroquel XR (quetiapine ER) 500 mg I also take meds for blood pressure, cholesterol, and tachycardia. |
![]() Anonymous 42424, Mountaindewed
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![]() *Beth*
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#1165
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Nammu …Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. …... Desiderata Max Ehrmann |
![]() Anonymous 42424
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![]() *Beth*
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#1166
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Sent from my SM-S901U using Tapatalk |
![]() Anonymous 42424
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#1167
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![]() Anonymous 42424
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#1168
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Welcome, bric! You are certainly in the right place. I relate strongly to each of the symptoms you've listed, as I'm sure many of us do. My precious sister died about 3 years ago...losing a sibling has been a very strange and wrong feeling to me. I'm glad you're here ![]()
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#1169
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Doing some grounding helped to bring me back into this time and place, more or less. The sleep problems definitely are not helpful...but much of that goes right back to that doctor's mistreatment of my symptoms. When I was with my therapist today she told me that she has other clients with bipolar disorder who are having problems with the same woman. The problem is that she refuses to diagnose people with bipolar disorder...she's not a psychiatrist, but is a DO, so medication is not her first choice of treatment. My T is definitely going to bat for me. I feel terribly betrayed by a clinic I trusted with my mental healthcare. Due to my situation with that woman, the way she yelled at me and so on, I've been extremely dissociative and having flashbacks, etc. When those things hit it is as though I am not at all 59, but fifteen, or seventeen, or eight. The experience is frightening, to say the least.
It's warm tonight. Something I like about being on the 2nd floor is that I can open my bedroom window at night. It can't be reached except with a ladder. My son, Noah, and my DIL were possibly coming by today, but he did the 100 mile bike ride and was totally wiped out. He said, "Mom, I realized I'm not in my 20's anymore!" ![]() Well, I'm going to put myself in the shower to get refreshed and try to sleep. My new med provider cancelled our appt. for tomorrow ![]() Beautiful, sweet daisies all around for you, and you, and you, and... ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
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![]() Anonymous 42424, Anonymous41462, MuddyBoots, Nammu, Soupe du jour, Sunflower123
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![]() ~Christina
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#1170
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Hope you will feel better tomorrow!
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![]() BeyondtheRainbow
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#1171
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![]() *Beth*
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#1172
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#1173
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Miss Mustachio caught in the act, this is the second time she stole the paper towel roll because I forgot to put it in a place she couldn't reach, she came running into my room carrying it again but this time I caught it in photos
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“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi Diagnosis: Schizoaffective disorder Bipolar type PTSD Social Anxiety Disorder Anorexia Binge/Purge type |
![]() Anonymous 42424, Anonymous41462, BeyondtheRainbow, Nammu, Soupe du jour, Sunflower123, wildflowerchild25
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![]() BeyondtheRainbow, MuddyBoots, Nammu, Soupe du jour, Sunflower123, wildflowerchild25, ~Christina
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#1174
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Precious!
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![]() Blue_Bird
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![]() Blue_Bird
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#1175
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I’m on the mend and I should be happy but lack of sleep is catching up with me. I’m irritable, exhausted and pessimistic. That’s not like me. I find it impossible to nap so night time is my time to catch up. I don’t quite feel back on my feet today. That sucks.
I have a consultation today for the growth on my tongue. I’m not really thrilled about having my tongue cut on but the growth will need to be removed and biopsied. Another cash outlay. It is raining cats and dogs. I’ll have to drive in downtown traffic to a place I don’t know. Fun. Yes, I know. Rarely grumpy. I am so far today. I’m going to work on getting a better attitude. I hope everyone has a peaceful day. Hugs to all! ![]() |
![]() Anonymous 42424, Anonymous41462, BeyondtheRainbow, Blue_Bird, MuddyBoots, Nammu, Soupe du jour
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![]() Blue_Bird, Soupe du jour, ~Christina
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