Bipolar Check-In #78

I would not worry about the expiration. The rules about putting expiration dates on foods and medications are very conservative. It is well-known that you can use milk past the expiry date Drinking Milk Past Its Use-By Date.

Harvard medical school has published results of study showing that meds were good for 15 (!) years after expiry date https://www.health.harvard.edu/stayi...afe%20to%20use.

And if it is expired, it is not poisonous, right? At worst it is ineffective. You have nothing to lose.

Unless I get a call saying to come in earlier, my next appointment is one day before you. Hopefully, we will both have successful appointments!

My next Pdoc appt
Is January 3. It feels
Forever away. I
Think
That the vraylar
Is helpinh

Yeah. I hope so! We can't go on like this.

My husband is going to help me wrap presents after work tomorrow. Whew. So that makes me a little less stressed, and I think I'm starting to feel better physically.

I'm just having bad paranoia and am afraid to go to bed. I'm afraid I'll have more nightmares. I don't know what to do! I don't know what my pdoc will be able to do for me on the 3rd. I don't want to make any major med adjustments (like starting something new) because he's on vacation all February. And my next appointment isn't until the end of March. I can't go up on loxapine because I can't tolerate it. I have a seroquel habit (in fact, I'll be out of prn seroquel by Saturday... I can't get a refill until after the holidays).

I'd prefer to just be on one antipsychotic.

I'm sick of being a walking pharmacy!!!!

I don't know how well seroquel works for psychosis? I just know it helps anxiety and mood.

@raspberrytorte I think seroquel is meant to be good for psychosis BUT it’s not a one size fits all

My back is at least 75% better (as long as I don't forget and do something stupid) and tomorrow I get my car back from the auto body shop. So I'm having a pretty happy night.

Tomorrow my sister and nieces will be up for the afternoon and I'm excited to see them. The older they get the harder it is to get time with them. My upcoming birthday wish is time with them since my birthday is on a weekend. We'll see if that works out.

I think I'm going to get to sleep before 1 AM, which is really good for me lately.

Ugh my heart feels like it’s gonna pound
Outta my chest! It’s so hard I can feel each beat in my pillow. Yall ever feel this??

Yes. I have SVT every few years where my heart rate resting can go to 160 bpm.

You need at least 300 mg of Seroquel for it to work as a full-fledged AP. Small doses are for sleep, high doses work against psychosis and mania.

I would not worry about being on more than one antipsychotic. This thinking that you cannot combine APs is going out of vogue. Whatever you need to stop this paranoia, take it.

Thanks.

I think I'm going to ask my pdoc to put me on 300mg of seroquel scheduled and 100mg prn. I was on that dose in the past. Can't remember why we reduced it. And then I'll wean myself the rest of the way off loxapine. I think he'll be open to that suggestion. He's pretty open to my suggestions. That way it's not like we're putting me on something completely new and won't know how it'll effect me. I tolerate seroquel well (unfortunately).

And today my 2 eldest kids come over for dinner and we exchange gifts. It’s the most wonderful time of the year! Going to watch my fiance do a fun run first. Then going to a South African store to buy alcohol. Then coming home to prepare the roast lamb. I’m so nervous I have to get the lamb right for the kids it’s important to me to serve them a good meal because we never all get together

I was in the ER for urinary retention yesterday. They think it’s my new psych med. so psych at the hospital prescribed perphenazine instead of fluphenazine which supposedly caused me to not be able to pee. They sent me home with a catheter in! There are so many what ifs swirling in my mind! Like what if I get a uti? How long will I have to wear the catheter? What if the new med does the same thing? I was soooo anxious in the hospital that i didn’t stop shaking but for a few seconds every so often. I had to have someone pick me up because I was so anxious that I thought I’d crash my car on the way home.

@Moose72 I’m sorry you’re going through that. Hope you feel better soon!

I get the same way with my adult son, worried about serving him a good meal when he visits. Next time he will probably come in January and I plan to make lamb chops for him . I hope your lamb comes out just perfect.

Lamb chops are just the best. Good luck for getting yours right too 😊

That sucks.

How long do you have to wear the catheter?

I slept a lot yesterday afternoon and pretty much all of last night. My moods have been fine all day. I ordered a Smokey Bear hat and an vintage looking sweatshirt that says Give A Hoot Don't Pollute from a site called The Landmark Project. Then half an hour ago I realized I don't really feel all that good physically. I'm kinda achy and I have a sore throat and I'm coughing a bit. Covid sucks right now and I've been out and around so who knows. Maybe its just nothing.

It's been a weird day. As I've mentioned before I see a law judge in February about disability-- i'm not so hopeful about it.

I got a CD in the mail from social security -- it's my disability file to review. The letter mentions wanting to update it with any/all information since last update to possibly make "a favorable decision without seeing the law judge".I looked through the CD and there's nothing really new of note to give them. My mom seems to think this is all a very good sign, but I think it's more protocol. I'll comply and give them updated records, but my heart will be crushed when I am denied a third time and told yet again I'm not " messed up enough" to matter.

If you have been denied two times, you need a disability attorney now. You can PM me and I will recommend a highly experienced lawyer who, I believe, takes cases nationwide.

I’m doing well overall. I lost both AD two weeks ago and so far so good.

Mom came back with a bad cold from visiting her sister’s and I’ve taken good care of her. She is back on her feet now but she has passed on the cold to me.

I’m looking forward to Christmas. My daughter is not talking to me again yet I’m excited. I’m happy, looking toward the future and working on moving on. Christmas we’ll drive to my sister’s house 20 miles away in the rain in brother’s big old truck. A little nervous about that. I’m not certain that I’m invited to the wedding. I plan to take a cruise if not. I’ll not sit and cry. Not my style.

I was feeling a little less than par so I had mom’s medicine and groceries delivered to the house and then a nutritious meal from Cracker Barrel. They left out my okra so they offered me a free meal. Can’t beat that.

I hope everybody has a peaceful evening.

Dare I say I actually had fun today? I took my niece to see the wonka movie. It was cute. Then we bought a few gifts. She’s nearly 12 abd my little buddy.

I’m
Going to my friends to make Christmas candy later tonight

I did an 'everything' workout today at the gym. That's where we work out the upper and lower body, so I'm very tired now.

We have some friends coming over for a pre-Christmas dinner, so it'll be a late night.

Still feeling anxious and low. It's hard to fake being happy when everything is so grey. Just taking it one step at a time.

Indefinitely. I hope my primary dr will take it out when I see her on the 26th. My urologist appointment isn’t until the 31st of next month and I’m NOT waiting that long!!

Oof ta. I phoned my friend this afternoon and we met downstairs with others and played games. Then took off to go out to eat. Tomorrow we’re going to play bingo then it’s Christmas. Hard to believe it’s here with no snow. But I’m glad. I don’t like driving in the snow.