Bipolar Check-In #91

OMG, I feel so much better today after remembering my night meds last night. Accidentally skipping them the night before was torture yesterday. I seriously wonder if this is what a drug addict feels when he or she can't get a next hit. I lasted 2 hr. after waking before I had to just take them all and sleep until after 2 PM, I couldn't stand it any longer.

I only slept from 12-4 this morning and I feel like crap! Tried going back to sleep but feel overly exhausted.

I feel good this morning. I needed a tylenol, 2 Zofran, 2 Dramamine, a pepcid, and a valium to feel better, but they worked.

I slept decently. I fell asleep before 6 and I was up off and on until 6. I think I got about 10 hours.

I need to do laundry but thats it today.

I thank the gods it’s the weekend and my landlord wasn’t here to hear me go all Rambo on my case manager this morning.

@Moose72

I'd be scared too! How are they going to get it out if they can't feel the strings?! What time is your appointment? Mine is 2pm central time. I'll be thinking about you tomorrow!

@Blueberrybook

Everytime I end up in this one hospital there's always up to three days where I don't get my meds. One time it was taking so long one of the nurses asked me if they were doing a med wash on me! I felt terrible! I was sweaty and anxious as fck. I know it would feel worse now because I'm on seroquel and I'd feel nauseous on top of it. I feel like a drug addict too. It sucks. I HATE that hospital.

My husband bought me this slow release melatonin because it was on sale and damn! The shyt really works! I went to bed at 11:30pm and didn’t wake up until 8:30am. Melatonin works better than seroquel! It's great! Which reminds me, I haven't taken my meds yet this morning. I should probably do that.

I still have post concert blues, but next Monday my husband and I are going to our next one. It's in Green Bay so we don't have to travel far or anything, which is nice for a change. I'm sad though because in October there's a music duo I really REALLY want to see, but our concert season is supposed to be over in September since we added twenty one pilots and our last show was supposed to be Sleep Token, but how was I supposed to know that suddenly Purity Ring was going to announce a tour!! They never tour! They're playing in Minneapolis and Chicago (for drivable distance wise).

My husband didn't say no at least. He said he'd think about it. He's just worried about cost because his student loans start up in October.

I hope everyone is having a good weekend!

@Victoria'smom

My family (not husband and daughter obviously) trigger me too. I'll be thinking about you.

I feel dizzy and my belly hurts.

I’m up and dressed. Have the big box of supplies on the cart ready to go. Oh, so not looking forward to this. Dreading it actually.

@Moose72 Do you still have that IUD in? If so, probably it's releasing the hormones as well and you're getting a double whammy. I would def. see about contacting a malpractice lawyer at this point. The gyn. should have done an ultrasound right after the insertion to be sure the IUD was in the right place. And if not then while you were stuck in the waiting room in agony; they should have released that was NOT normal. Then if the IUD has still been in wrong, you have been suffering a long time now. How long has it been?

Yesterday I was so exhausted! I went to my Sci-Fi group Coffee Talk at Starbucks, and had a great Time Travel discussion. My friend was there and we were talking about Galaxy Con - it's coming up in two weeks! I am excited. After that, I had lunch with my sponsor at Chipotle, and talked about some much needed AA talk. I am definitely behaving like a dry drunk with all my ups and downs. But drinking never solves anything, especially if you're on meds.

Then I met my other friend I met on Bumble for Superman! It was so good, we had a lot of fun. I loved Krypto the Super Dog, he was really cute. Me and my friend had a great conversation afterwards in the lounge, we're becoming really close. We planned a sleepover at my house in August.

I didn't go to mass today because I couldn't deal with that hot church, and am just exhausted from yesterday. I feel bad about not going to my parents either. But I didn't go because I wanted to visit my pregnant church friend that took me to dinner for my birthday, she had her baby!! He's over 9 pounds!! What a big baby!! My friend is so tiny too, lol. She is such a rock star. About to get in the shower now and go see her - thinking I am going to treat myself to some Zaxby's too - even though I am tired I feel really good for a change.

Hope everyone has a great day!!

Two weeks tomorrow is how long I’ve had it in. I contacted a lawyer yesterday. He said we’d have to prove damage. For there to be a lawsuit. He said go to the appointment Monday. Got a call in to the on call OBGYN. Waiting for them to call me back.

I'd be scared too! How are they going to get it out if they can't feel the strings?! What time is your appointment? Mine is 2pm central time. I'll be thinking about you tomorrow

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They have instruments to “sweep” the strings out- unless they’re in the uterus then they have to dilate your cervix. I’m just worried about unsticking it! That’s gonna hurt and bleed! And they are acting like I’m over reacting like all they’re doing is a regular iud removal I.e. pull on the strings. It’s at 3:50 EST.

Message here la la la…..

I hope it all goes fast and you finally get relief.

They put me on hold!

Now the call was disconnected. They have my number. Hope they call me back.

Meh. The on-call OBGYN said to ask the dr at the clinic to remove it and that the strings not being there could be they’re inside the cervix not that the iud has moved- obviously it’s still in my uterus but malpositioned is what I read in the ultrasound report. She said it’s not an emergency. It’s an office visit situation. I call bull**** since the ultrasound said the stem is bent! It’s obviously not in there right!

On call OBGYN says my iud being misplaced and no strings are not an emergency and to call the office tomorrow. She said the strings could be inside the cervix! Bullsh*t. I can’t find them at all and that’s reason enough to call! This is my 4th IUD and over never not been able to find the strings.

Your male lawyer sounds dismissive. I think you already have plenty, what with the PE. This is a pattern of incompetence.

The lawyer is calling me tomorrow evening I assume as I told them my appointment’s in the late afternoon.

Well, I feel bad. My next door neighbor has really bad PTSD, and my clumsy, insomniac, shakey hands dropping shyt too much, hyperactive/can't stay still arse (that wants to do all the meal planning when it's below 90F which is kinda only at like midnight through 5am) reminded her too much of an old neighbor that was bad enough they had to separate them (I met the old neighbor, recently diagnosed bipolar ) and now if one of them starts talking to me about the other I have to tell the landlord or the resident worker, sent her to the hospital crying a little while ago.

Came to the library because fk it if I'm going to hurt OTHER people all day it might as well be strangers. Maybe I'll join the dude smoking crack outside.

Put music on and my heating pad and I’m hopefully going to take a nap. I’m past it!

Can you take Tylenol (maybe even PM if the goal is sleep)?

That all sounds awful. I'm so sorry. I wish they would take you seriously!

Don’t have any pm kind just regular or ibuprofen which I can take every 8 hours.

@Moose72 I feel awful for you I'd be SHYT scared about getting that IUD out. I assume it's impossible to get a new gyn at this point?

Sorry you're having a hard time It sucks to hurt others when you're feeling SHYT messed up. I wish you had a better treatment team.