Bipolar Check-In #92

Nice that you got out @raspberrytorte!

I had to pick up my son early from school at 2:30 because he’s feeling poorly. At first I thought maybe the injection yesterday but I don’t think that’s it. It’s a vitamin b12 injection. Maybe it’s the long acting Ritalin that he changed to last week that his system is still adjusting to. Not sure.

Mental health wise I feel better then last night. But back and stomach are acting all crazy. I reschedled .my kidney doctors appointment.

Good morning, slept pretty decently. I played my videogame Wylde Flowers for a couple hours last night and it helped stop my dissociation. Sometimes getting immersed in a hobby helps it.

Have a meeting with my program manager today. Then gonna get on the treadmill. Rest of the day I’m gonna read then play my videogame again. Should be a good day

My doctor called today and my surgery is set up for September 5th. I'll be there overnight. The surgery is 3 hours which kinda freaks me out.

I just feel meh right now. It will be a long 3 weeks.

I messaged my pdoc to let him know what was going on. Not sure if I should but I figured he would want to know

Stomach feels like crap but I took IBgard which helped a bit.

My pdocs nurse just wanted some details so my chart would be accurate. I don't really rely on my pdoc because I have my therapist and endocronolgist who mainly help me out with things. But i thought my pdoc should be in the loop

Vraylar takes a full month to kick in! I’ve been on it since 7/30. Not enough time. See my separate post on this subject.

All over with. Gotta do it again in three years! Ugh last time it was 5. My daughter came picked me up, then afterwards we went to the grill. I had an omelette. It was huge, couldn’t finish it. Getting ready to go downstairs.

On an emotional rollercoaster - I am so hungry but I don't want to eat. Called to make my annual physical and my doctor's on leave of absence. I'm so upset because it took me forever to find her - she really helped with my diabetes and checking on my thyroid- now I don't know what the hell I am going to do - I really would hate to start over and try and find another doctor.

I am so upset - I just wish everything wasn't so damn hard. I have therapy finally today - it feels like it's been forever since therapy, because it was a whole month ago.

I woke up at 4:00am with a headache. Just got out of bed and made coffee and took paracetamol. Don’t feel the greatest. Hopefully my son is alright to go to school when he wakes up. I already had 2 days off last week…..don’t really think I can take today off. Of course if he’s sick I will, it’s just not ideal.

Up and out by 7. Got to the clinic at 9:15. Was second in line she got heartworm and flea medicine, deworming, and shots. She's good for another 3 weeks. She's gained 3 lbs since we got her

Oh my word get my first client as a therapist this weekend!

Quote:

Originally Posted by HALLIEBETH87 Oh my word get my first client as a therapist this weekend!

Congratulations!

I think this higher seroquel dose is helping because I genuinely enjoyed school today and I haven't enjoyed anything in AGES. I smiled, laughed, and got excited. My students were a hoot today and asked some really, really good questions in religion and I was actually enjoying all of this instead of it all feeling like a chore. Depression wise, I've still got a ways to go, but it was nice to have a little bit of calm within the storm.

POTS fatigue is real tonight though. I have to get laundry done, but am just going to have a bowl of cereal for dinner instead of cooking because I just don't have the energy to do laundry and cook. I'll cook tomorrow.

Wonder why 3 years? Did you have polyps?
Or if I may ask...
Do you have a history of uterine cancer or other cancer/ I can't remember if you mentioned that before?
My ill memory !
bizi

My doctor prescribed me 3 things with long names. An antbiotic specfically to prevent bacteria infections

Something that does this according to google.s

Neomycin can be used to suppress normal gut bacteria before intestinal surgeries

And I guess I also have to drink the barium stuff for colonoscpys. I guess they want everything out of my system.

I'm a bit freaked out. I ate broth for dinner again. I have therapy tommorow which might help

Maybe I'm just losing it but a car pulled up behind of my mom this afternoom and its still there and it looks a bit like the therapist car who I just wrote a bad review about

I have a lot of unstructured time. It’s really not good for me. I’m becoming more depressed I think. I want to stay in bed and sleep or watch tv. I have to push myself to get out of my room and get dressed. Even then, I’m sitting in the living room. I clean house and mow yard, but it’s not very stimulating. I’m looking for a part time job, but I have a lot of health problems. It all becomes overwhelming and discouraging.

4 am zoomies.

Happy Thursday everyone!

Yes, I think I go through some amount of depression in a cycle and then hypomania. Most of the time, I'm hypomanic or feeling average.

Obviously my medications aren't right. But I get adjusted A LOT with this result being about as good as it gets (not too bad - but now I'm on the hypo-happy end, which is definitely impacting my level of concern here :-P )

Happy birthday to Jane and Raspberry!!

I went to Scrabble last night. I enjoyed the restaurant before, East Indian, superb. I spent hours eating a three-course meal as spicy food is challenging for my stomach but it worked out well. I took pictures of each masterpiece for Facebook friends.

Scrabble didn't go so well as i am out-of-practice. I pulled off one advanced move, i was really pleased. But i made one huge amateurish error and even tho i still won in points by 35 i lost in an overtime penalty of 50. It was this darn tiny clock and i hadn't changed to my reading glasses and didn't notice.

So that was disappointing. I took a car service both ways and it was a lot more pleasant. I think i'll go back and just insist on using my own clock with a decent-sized readout. I only lasted the one game but that's okay, it was my first night back in a long time. I can also drill my speed this week online.

I wish Scrabble was more social. There's one woman i've known for decades that i'd like to be friends with but i seem to decline all opportunities with her. I fear what i desire. It's discouragingly perverse. I chat with others i have no interest in, but i am tongue-tied with the one woman i long for friendship with.

Slept 4 hours last night and 4 the night before that. Not ideal. Hopefully I can get some good sleep tonight. I have an appointment with my psychiatrist tomorrow. We’re stopping the last of the trileptal since I’m on the full dose of Lamictal now and am doing well on that combined with my other meds. Happy to be able to be on one less med. It would be nice to eventually come off Thorazine as well. I might see if we can start tapering me off of it starting tomorrow. He said if I’m doing well and not overspending or manic anymore then we can possibly consider stopping the Thorazine.

Ultimately the goal is to be on just:

Abilify 30 mg
Lamictal 200 mg
Zoloft 50 mg
Klonopin as needed

We might eventually be able to drop the Zoloft as well since Lamictal is in the picture now. It would be awesome to be on just the two meds abilify and Lamictal.

I’ll see what he says tomorrow

Quote:

Originally Posted by LadyShadow On an emotional rollercoaster - I am so hungry but I don't want to eat. Called to make my annual physical and my doctor's on leave of absence. I'm so upset because it took me forever to find her - she really helped with my diabetes and checking on my thyroid- now I don't know what the hell I am going to do - I really would hate to start over and try and find another doctor. I am so upset - I just wish everything wasn't so damn hard. I have therapy finally today - it feels like it's been forever since therapy, because it was a whole month ago.

I’m sorry things are hard right now. I know dealing with doctors is pain in the butt. Hopefully, things will improve soon.

I was up for 4 hours in the middle of the night again. I posted in my separate thread about it- found a couple cool videos, one an awesome lullaby- but now I have one hour left before I can call my case manager who will message my psych NP.

EDIT: I texted my case manager just half an hour ago! Text me back! Get a move on!!!

Man the lack of sleep the past two nights is just now starting to catch up to me. I feel like crap and am very anxious. I was sitting outside reading and I just felt suddenly overwhelmingly exhausted then my heart started racing and I began having a panic attack. I should probably try to take a nap at some point today. I always think I function fine on little sleep because it gives me more time to be productive and do stuff but it always eventually catches up with me

I had switched therapy to virtual last night, but this morning I felt good enough to go in person. I took a shower for the first time in a few days and I dropped something off at Fedex.

Not gonna lie I'm pretty worried. But I'm glad to get out of my house today and away from my house and music which I've been listening to too much of.

I got blue light blocking in my new glasses that I pick up on Monday. I think I’ve been manic for two weeks and especially since this past Sunday when I only got 45 minutes of sleep before I had to leave for church to see N3 and his dad sing. Still have 2 weeks worth of Vraylar 4.5 left out of a 30 day supply. PNP said the Vraylar wouldn’t have its full effect until I’d been on it a month! Yesterday and today I was awake for about 4 hours each night in the wee hours of the morning/night. I washed my dirty laundry yesterday and folded it. This morning I put it all in my dresser. N3 is on a trip far enough away that he had to take a plane to get there. Haven’t heard from him yesterday or today but he did say they were going to go hiking both days so there’s that giving me anxiety.