Bipolar Check-In #93

Good m everyone

I’m struggling to get up here. Drinking a latte. My partner wok me up at 5:00am on a Saturday when he took the bloody dog for a walk. Not on a Saturday! He does this ALL the time I’m so sick of it. I’ve asked him before if he can go around the house and not right through the front door but no he can’t. And because my bedroom door is right by the front door I get woken up every Saturday and Sunday when I want to sleep in. Ughhhh it’s frustrating.

Rant over I’m going to go make another latte so I can wake up!

I cant even begin because I'm so high and I have a 4 inch incision in my stomach and holy **** this pain.

I'll update later when I'm not strung out on Oxy and in a crap ton of pain

Hope they get the pain under control soon @Mountaindewed Thanks for letting us know you got through it.

Glad you got the procedure over with, MD. Wishing you as speedy and easy a recovery as possible.

Best of luck with your recovery @Mountaindewed!

I might have a lot of medical stress coming my way.

I'm not thrilled with my new insurance right now. Initially, I was charged $50 for my IV fluids. I just received a bill for an IV back in July for another almost $200...I've received multiple IVs since this July one so I'm wondering if I have more $200 bills coming my way. I was already planning on trying to pause my IVs because I'm sick of getting poked multiple times every appointment, but now I definitely need to take a break in case this is what all the IVs are going to cost. Things could get interesting health and finance wise...At least it's easy to set up a payment plan.

I also am trying to get my birth control (for my bipolar symptoms) refilled. The CVS website had me answer whether or not I still take lamotrigine (I do). I've read that birth control can lower the affect of lamotrigine so, hopefully, they just want to warn me about this. This hasn't come up before because I was getting the birth control filled at a different pharmacy than the rest of my meds (long story).

Had such an amazing day today doing a whole lot of nothing. It was really nice to really enjoy my apartment talk to myself and dance around and be foolish. My guy recommended a really crazy interesting movie that Christopher Nolan directed before he did Batman called "Memento" starring Guy Pearce and Carrie Ann Moss. It was SO good - great murder mystery plot with a guy who gets involved with a crazy murder revenge plot that has no short-term memory. Had me guessing right up until the end.

After that it was a night of fun and laughs and all the cool shows. I think I may be finally turning a corner in all this depression, where Fall is going to bring out the best in me. I am a very seasonal bipolar person, where fresh air and cool breezes help my mood so much. Being cooped up in all this air conditioning all summer really took it's toll. This is where I miss NYC so much - Auttumn in New York is heaven in my opinion.

Anyway, @Mountaindewed - praying for your speedy recovery - and everybody else, have a great night and I hope you all have an awesome start to your weekend.

Ugh. Last night I was up all night with an upset stomach. I fell asleep about 7:30 AM and slept until 1, so 5.5 hours. I usually sleep closer to 11-12 hours. I did not let myself nap although I also didn't do much because I was still not feeling super. And now it's 1 AM and I'm still awake. I took a PRN a little bit ago so hopefully I get to sleep soon. I can't believe I didn't fall asleep early after the lack of sleep. I suspect it's related to the decrease in my klonopin. I even thought about taking that extra .5 mg but I don't want to resume it now when my body has to be starting to adjust.

I am so tired!!!!

Dewed so glad you could update us!!!

Glad you got your procedure over with MD, hope you start feeling better soon

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I slept about 2 1/2 hours. Woke up at 2am and couldn’t get back to sleep so I’m up for the day I guess. I’m gonna try to get outside in the sun for 30-45 min today and read. My vitamin D levels are still really low. Then I’m gonna clean and do some laundry. And get on the treadmill. Actually it’s going on 4:30am right now. Might bet the best time to get the laundry started when everyone is isn’t using the laundry room.

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Okay laundry is done and put away , put together three bags of clothes to be donated, I cut my clothes down to the stuff that actually fits and that I actually will wear, which isnt a lot but I’d rather have less. And I have two maybe 3 bags of trash to take out too today.

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Sounds like you’ve had a productive morning @Blue_Bird, and it ain’t even 6am!

Yeah got a lot done then took my morning meds and now they’re kicking in and the tiredness is hitting me so I ran out of steam lol I’m probably gonna be up for the rest of the day just hope for a better night of sleep tonight. I figured since I had the energy to do some chores I might as well have done them since I struggle a lot with the procrastination so when I do have energy and feel motivated I have to take advantage of it even if it is at 2am lol

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Waiting for the sun to come out so I can go sit outside and read my book in the sunlight for 30-45 min for vitamin d and mood etc. still way too early it’s only 7:30am now.

I’ll have to take like 3 or 4 trips down to the dumpster to get rid of stuff cause I can’t carry it all in one go and I don’t really trust the elevator because it gets stuck frequently and I’ve gotten stuck in it a few times. So it’ll be walking up and down 3 flights of stairs each trip. But after that will be doing the treadmill for 30 min

I feel pretty good despite the lack of sleep. Am in a good mood. Glad it’s the weekend. Things are always a little calmer on the weekends cause there’s not appointments or building events and stuff like that.

I feel like my focus is starting to improve a tiny bit on the algae omega 3s. I feel less scattered and am able to sit through shows and have been more inclined to read lately.

Edit: well so much for sitting out in the sun. It’s gonna be gloomy and raining most of the day

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Anyone know what to do if you have a one night stand in a different town and forget your phone there but don't have a way of getting there?

edit: we're good, someone's giving me a ride back there in a little bit

An insurance adjuster from the condominium corporation called me about the accident on June 2nd. It's triggered my PTSD. I've realized it's been triggered since the slip-and-fall a week ago. When will this be over?

found a thing

Caaaaaaaaaake!!!!

so that's your favorite on today's to-do. Mine's adding fuel to the fire

Cake is always my favorite. I never put sugar on my cereal as a kid, and didnt eat frosted flakes like my brother did, but boy did i want me a birthday cake rose!

ETA - Getting some chores done. My phone is having charging issues, so i am not on it too much today.

I walked to that indie bookstore and dropped off my job application. Then I stopped by a used bookstore and got a paperback called The Historian in great condition for $3. They told me that the library is having a book sale on the 27th and 28th. Thousands of books available. You can fill an entire big bag full of any of them for a total price of $1. So I plan on going both days and getting a bag each day. They tend to have really good stuff so I’m super excited. $2 for two big bags of books of my choosing. Yay!

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Last birthday I was involved in was a couple weeks ago, but I threw up the cake the next morning. We usually have a birthday tradition where whoever finished their next lap around the sun picks out a cake from Market Basket after we eat at the Common Man. My birthday is next week so I told my mom she's going to have to take me to this local soup place and get me birthday cake protein shakes, powder, or bars. I sent her a link to a birthday cake flavored whey protein powder with that text haha (honestly, love making protein-packed desserts like brownies, mug cakes, cookies, etc.). She said she might but she still wants me to pick out a little cake for her and some other people if we do a get together thing. Una, I'll save a slice for you when you come out this way, alright?

I got my phone back now. She was like "I heard this thing go off at like 9:30 and I'm thinking 'who tf left their phone here that gets calls this early on a SATURDAY?!?' " ahh, just people who get calls about the psych meds they're not trusted to handle on their own, my friend. And I guess some important people.

Honestly, sameeeee my landlord saw video of me taking out the trash at like 1am one morning and she's like "aren't you afraid of walking out there in the middle of the night?" nahhh, when I'm sleep deprived I'm told I get "crazy eyes" and HAVE run into some no good people that I just looked at and they changed their mind (thinking of that day I almost jumped from a bridge and this guy came up acting all thug-like and I'm pretty sure this song went through my head)



(this whole album is one of my guilty pleasures)