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#326
Dec 04, 2014, 07:50 AM
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My boyfriend makes me feel like absolute ****, he's sleeping next to me right now and I may as well not even be here. He clearly doesn't want to talk to me or f***ing touch me.
And I don't think this is the BPD talking...I wish it was, because he used to be wonderful and make me feel amazing. Now I'm just laying here crying. I know it's lame but I really just need someone to love me and hold me right now. Ehh I'm gonna hate this check in tomorrow.
__________________
"Mental wounds still screaming, Driving me insane I'm going off the rails on a crazy train" |
 Anonymous100185
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#327
Dec 04, 2014, 10:47 AM
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The s word is on my mind today. I'm never going to be good for anything. My boss just yeled at me because 3 every thing is a mess. I work so hard to keep it clean but the other girl who works here doesn't. But I get yelled at for it. I should do better. I should be better. I never will be. I'm so sorry to anyone's life I have ruined.
__________________
Life's so dark when every day is a struggle
Why go out and see the world on fire Don't let your mindset become what controls you Speak right now and make the choice to grow |
| Bill3
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#328
Dec 04, 2014, 12:14 PM
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If your working but the other girl isn't pulling her weight how is that your fault? Why should you be yelled at? In fact yelling at employees is a sign of ineffective management. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
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Verity  
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 Bill3, Britneigh, SeekerOfLife
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#329
Dec 04, 2014, 12:16 PM
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Not too bad a day. We did opposite action in group today. Acting opposite to anxiety is a tough one for me but I can't let it control my life anymore!
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
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Verity
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| Bill3, SeekerOfLife
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#330
Dec 05, 2014, 04:44 AM
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Britneigh, it is not your fault. You are not responsible for how they act. You deserve better. |
| Achy Turtle Armor, Angelique67, Bill3, Britneigh
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#331
Dec 05, 2014, 04:16 PM
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Very overwhelmed today. My anxiety is over the top.
Living with my aunt, which I am starting to realize her lack of compassion is triggering to my emotional well - being 
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Listen to your own voice, your own soul, too many people listen to the noise of the world, instead of themselves. -Leon Brown |
| Bill3
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#332
Dec 05, 2014, 04:46 PM
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triggers by atypical psychology that i am learning in school. its horrible that people in my class have such bad virws of borderline. i snapped.... i feel.....
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| Bill3, SeekerOfLife
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#333
Dec 06, 2014, 07:54 AM
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had my first appointment with the new T... not sure I like her but I'll give it a try. I'm so tired. I heard coyotes howling in the back field so I was up all night worrying about the animals. Hopefully when I go outside everyone is alright and they didn't get anyone
__________________
Life's so dark when every day is a struggle
Why go out and see the world on fire Don't let your mindset become what controls you Speak right now and make the choice to grow |
| SeekerOfLife
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| Bill3
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#334
Dec 06, 2014, 11:53 AM
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#335
Dec 06, 2014, 12:09 PM
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Quote:
__________________
...In the darkness I will meet my creators And they will all agree, that I’m a suffocator
 -Daughter |
| Britneigh
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#336
Dec 07, 2014, 04:37 AM
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I'm hurting so much today.
Trying hard to keep it together in front of the family. |
| Bill3
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#337
Dec 07, 2014, 09:53 AM
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Quote:
 <<< if it's ok.
__________________
...In the darkness I will meet my creators And they will all agree, that I’m a suffocator
-Daughter |
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#338
Dec 09, 2014, 02:22 AM
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Wow for a professor he sure is ignorant! Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
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Verity
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| Espresso
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#340
Dec 10, 2014, 12:52 AM
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Very rough day...I found one of the dogs dead on the side of the road...someone hit her and just left her, no swerve marks or hint of stopping and it's a dirt road so if they tried you'd be able to tell. Such a bad year. So over everything.
__________________
Life's so dark when every day is a struggle
Why go out and see the world on fire Don't let your mindset become what controls you Speak right now and make the choice to grow |
| Bill3, Espresso
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#341
Dec 10, 2014, 03:23 AM
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Quote:
sorry to hear that. There has been a few animals die this year. I hope and pray things get better for you. At least take some comfort in the fact that you take care of them so well and show them a lot of love. You are making a huge difference in this world to those animals lives. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
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Verity
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| Achy Turtle Armor, Bill3
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#342
Dec 10, 2014, 03:25 AM
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I'm determined to stay mindful today as I don't want the worries to send me into a tail spin. I catastrophise so much. Repeat after me 'I can't predict the future'
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
__________________
Verity
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| shezbut
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| Bill3
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#343
Dec 14, 2014, 07:47 AM
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I'm not going okay tonight. I haven't been this bad in a long time. I have no one I can talk to.
One of those nights where I don't feel safe by myself.
__________________
"Mental wounds still screaming, Driving me insane I'm going off the rails on a crazy train" |
| FlowerChild67
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| Mindful55
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#344
Dec 14, 2014, 07:58 AM
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Quote:
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| Achy Turtle Armor, Bubbles&Buttercup, FlowerChild67
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#345
Dec 14, 2014, 08:37 AM
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It all sounds so trivial and dumb, it's just the depression blowing everything out of proportion, but I can't break out of it. Just wishing someone would see that I'm struggling and keep me company until it passes. Thanks for replying, I didn't really expect anyone to.
__________________
"Mental wounds still screaming, Driving me insane I'm going off the rails on a crazy train" |
| shezbut
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#346
Dec 14, 2014, 10:47 AM
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Depression really is hard to break out of. When I was young I used to find exercise helped a lot, if I could force myself to do it. Just a nice walk helped a lot. Especially with my old Walkman and singing along to it which probably sounded bad but felt great. I hope you'll feel a lot better soon!
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#347
Dec 14, 2014, 03:49 PM
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I am feeling rather avoidant. I am not looking forward to work, taking a shower, get up (out of bed), etc. I just want to stay in bed forever. Unsure why ~ but I've been struggling with this daily for a few weeks now.
__________________
"Only in the darkness can you see the stars." - Martin Luther King Jr. "Forgive others not because they deserve forgiveness but because you deserve peace." - Author Unkown |
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#348
Dec 14, 2014, 06:09 PM
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Quote:
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| shezbut
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#349
Dec 14, 2014, 07:06 PM
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Made it through the night without doing anything stupid. Feeling a lot calmer this morning, but like the depression is sitting just under the surface and waiting for a reason to pop up again. Gonna try distract myself and hopefully I won't have to deal with it again just yet.
__________________
"Mental wounds still screaming, Driving me insane I'm going off the rails on a crazy train" |
| Angelique67, SeekerOfLife
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#350
Dec 14, 2014, 09:07 PM
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Sunday night has often been tough cuz Monday's bring therapy!! Sometimes I'm ready for it other times I'm not, I think right now I'm not! ��
__________________
 [SIGPIC][SIGPIC]Forgiveness is not always easy but is possible! |
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