Originally Posted by ShyPoetGirl

Are things going to be okay or not? At this point, I don't know.
My parents are both sober right now - first time they've both been sober in days. And they're not talking to each other. I wish they could work something out so life can go back to how it was before. But I'm aware that probably will never happen. I know Mom will never get over it. I just hope that Dad and my aunt are both very sorry.

Well, while sober Dad has owned up to some things.
I don't think Mom will ever forgive him, though. Who can blame her?
I wish things could go back to normal, but that's not realistic.
I don't know where to go from here...

[TheOriginalMe]

I had one of those days where I did pleasant things, I wanted to enjoy them, I had some fleeting moments of pleasure, but at the end of it all I still felt miserable.

[aprillynn197]

I am so ****in bored

[tigerlily84]

I went to work today and as usual I was anxious the entire time. I think the meds I'm taking literally take the light out of my eyes. I am so tired no matter how much sleep I get. Pdoc suggested to cut the pill in half, but I still feel exhausted no matter what. I even took it an earlier time, and I still have a hard time getting up in the morning. I can't focus, can't think.

[tigersassy]

I'm depressed and it continues. Its been a long month. Brain is crap. Do they duo brain transplants?

[maddnessreturns]

Bad day or so. I just can't function right now. I just want to sleep. My stress and anxiety that comes with my depression is causing my migraines to come back which is just another med and another day in bed.

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[aprillynn197]

When everything literally sucks ***.

[Tucson]

I am struggling today. I took a shower. This has been my only accomplishment for the day.

Even with all that's happened, and both of my parents drinking tonight, there hasn't been a single fight between the two of them. Is this a sign that things can only go up from here? Should I be worried?

They'll both be sober tomorrow, and I'm hoping so hard the two of them can work things out. I'm clinging to this frail hope that we can recover, even if only partially. That hope is the only thing keeping me from giving up.

[Clara22]

I am still at the hospital. My health is not improving. Here I have a Pdoc and T. They gave me fluoxetine 20mg. I am trying to keep calm

[aprillynn197]

Ive hurt and been hurt severely. I dont know how to come back from this.

[hope2010]

I am so tired, physically and mentally tired. The medications made me tired, the post cancer treatment made me more tired, fatigue, joints pain, and my mind ... well my mind is not fine. If it is true that all the mental illness I have are from a Chemical imbalance, then why is taking more than 3 decades to find the right medications and dose to help me?

I know, is not all about the medication, I need therapy too, but time pass and here am writing to you all about how much I want to be a normal person. I think am not going not be normal, ever, not even when I think that am stable am normal. I can live with that but I can't stand this emptiness, the sad and dark thoughts, the pain, the irony of this lonely ...

Chemical imbalance is one hypothesis about the cause of mental illness. Other causes that are debated include psychological and social causes. Sourcehttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chemical_imbalance

[dandylin]

Starting a new job tomorrow. I've had 3 crying jags and 2 panic attacks this weekend. What the heck is wrong with me

[Rose76]

I'm not improving. This is so demoralizing.

[aprillynn197]

Was ok earlier now I feel like ****.

[Nammu]

The pdoc listened and took me seriously, what a nice change from the past. He didn't discount my side effects and agreed with my changing the time to evening.
I'm a bit worried about the blood work results next week but other wise doing ok. Coasting along at null level.

Getting up after only 3 hours sleep doesn't help.. I don't know why my doc didn't care about my heart, it is really bugging me.
I made myself get out today, but it wasn't great. My son is out of my hands a bit, but I'm exhausted and will just have to put up with his anger later when I unplug his videogame..
I'm very lonely today and down, hoping tomorrow is better

[mulan]

This night I saw a falling star. My sister told me to make a wish, I know these things don't work, but even só I wished for friends.

[tigerlily84]

I am frustrated. I want to get back to being myself again. But I don't really know who that is.

[lilypup]

Good day today.

[Shriveled Muse]

Death or not. This thought that constantly permeates my every moment. For all those people that tell me that I have nothing to be upset about, that it's all my imagination, I bet it won't be imagination if I leave from this world, would it?

I know that I wouldn't, but I feel that that moment is gaining momentum... Speeding up closer to the present.... And then I don't know anymore.

[gracebuttercup]

Originally Posted by Shriveled Muse

Death or not. This thought that constantly permeates my every moment. For all those people that tell me that I have nothing to be upset about, that it's all my imagination, I bet it won't be imagination if I leave from this world, would it?

I know that I wouldn't, but I feel that that moment is gaining momentum... Speeding up closer to the present.... And then I don't know anymore.

Hi. I am new here. And dont know you. But I hope you do not leave this world. I stfuggle with the feelings too. But I sorta want to finish what I started. No matter how difficult it is. that doesnt change that I want to leave. I think that I am also a bit scared to die. But anyway, I do hope you will stay.

[gracebuttercup]

I live with depression. Has always been that way from the first days I can remember. I think its genetic. And also other things. I had my true self taken from me long ago. And recovering it is a daunting task. I try to smile a lot. And I am successful at doing that when I am out in public. I honestly prefer to smile anyway. I think it makes me feel happy to smile. But there is a deep saddness and depression. This, I know.

[TheOriginalMe]

Yesterday I went for a walk in the woods, it was vey muddy as it had been raining. I was walking up a really steep hill and of course I fell face down into the mud. I had an asthma attack for the first time in years. So there I was, lying in the mud, struggling to breath and thinking I don't think I can get up. There was no one to ask for help. Why do I have to do everything alone? Even getting up when I am hurt has to be alone. It has always been that way and now I am so accustomed to alone-ness that it will always be that way.

[regretful]

Just numb...regretting my decision of over a year ago, and I'm just a mess since then. I never thought that life could get this complicated. I've really ruined my life...