Haven’t had a drink in 2 days...on call at the moment. Just wondering if this will make a difference or just less obnoxious.

my positive today is that I tried a candycain for the first time

in all these years i've actually never had one. it tasted good, like a stick of rock from the seaside. I've also sorted my shopping list now, so tomorrow I'll work on ordering it all

I'm not feeling anything special, I'm just going through them otions- of getting breakfast, having a drink, listening to music, doing what ever else I need to do to get through the day.. I don't feel great but don't feel terrible either

just getting by and doing what I need to do

[lucidity11]

nothing feels right. I think I am going to move again.

We drank a beer last night,,it was awful. The second one gave us a headache all night plus it tasted bad.

I’m thinking that the meds took over finally now that body isn’t saturated.

I’m good with this.

The buzz made me dp very much...more then usual. So, thus ends another overdue drinking career.

honestly I fdeel like ****

most of it's down to the fact I had my shower and that never lifts my mood- just makes me feel gross (seeing my body and stuff just freaks me), and honestly my mood's not been great either.
I've had this " what ever" attitude for the past few days. I did my food shopping today because I had too, but that's all I did- I sat in my bedroom, curtains closed, listening to teacup travels (classical music cd)

you know when your mood's not great when you don't even want light in your room

[dlantern]

I'm basically clowning having a good time for the holiday.....Not really much to check in for the this time of the year

We’re not allowed to self destruct.

Originally Posted by AlwaysChanging2

We’re not allowed to self destruct.

I think that's a good thing.

no harming yourself

on monday we're having someone come to our house to fit a new peace of glass in the window

some of us (actually most of us), arn't happy about that and we're discussing it- like the pros and cons

it's a loud day in atlantis

alisha finally got a day when she can go to build a bear (friday 21st)

she's so happy and can't wait to make her paw patrol bear and kiss the heart

personally i'm dreading it... the christmas rush, the crowds, the kids, the waiting around- plus she wants to go on a train

can you imagine it?

me on a packed train for 25 minits?

going to try at least comprimise with that part

I've been sat here for the past 15/20 minits wondering what I'm going to say about today (I litirally don't know)

well not really one of the best days- sat here in the dark (now posting on the forum), but before watching tv, and in a lot of chronic pain

can't believe it's sunday and another weekend has passed with very little (none?) activity

what can I say

Possible trigger:

I don't want to be here

and I know sitting here waiting for death isn't really the answer, but what is

It feels good to be free....

The silly silly boys thinks we get us drunk to take over...wrong! Lol

We haven’t a drink yet, but a beer would be nice here soon.

we're pannicking because we can't find our white halloween lights and we want them back up

currently we have blue ones, but I don't have the heart to go and turn them on (it's sort of an OCD thing I think, we have white lights in our room, not any other color). we thought we'd be okay with it- but actually we're not

just don't know where the white lights went

our mother decided to email us more threats today- asking us

Possible trigger:

if we could just kill ourselves or let her do it so that she can have a happy christmas

I honestly don't know what's wrong with her and what she's acheeving by saying these things, but honestly she's a sick woman and is probably just looking for a reaction (we didn't reply to the message, we just deleted it)

not up to anything else really

eating, chilling, the usual..

[BrokenButRebuilding]

If I experience a lot of stress, I feel like my hands are the size of hulk hands and I feel like I step outside of my body. Does that count?

today I finally got round to watching "elf", and actually really enjoyed it.

I think i mentioned here before- someone tried to lend me the disk but it was badly damaged.

it was nice to watch it in full on tv- okay, so the end was a bit.... blah, but the rest of it was good (I love the fact that one of the characters in elf has my name!)

it's still not as good as muppet's christmas carol, but the movie is up their now as one of my top christmas movies. could it be something I watch every christmas?. quite possibly!

had my nails repainted today (gold with glitter), and also wrote my shopping list and menu for next week.

the bad sides of today is that I didn't sleep at all last night, and that I spent the day in unthinkable amounts of pain (I think I had enough pain in my back and legs today to probably break a world record)

also very depressed

well it's oficial

we can't use the new forum on that blog because you have to pay for access

and sadly we can't aford it

it's ashame because I'm sure it would have been nice

you win some and lose some, I guess, and in this case things arn't working in our favor

no sleep and feeling average.

could feel a whole lot worse, but also could feel a whole lot better (and wish I did)

[lucidity11]

went to see my new t. she seemed good.

time to watch mr tumble

little treat for the littles

I have been in so much physical pain today that any other emotions I may have had were dulled

all I could feel was the pain. it was so painful

[Mountaindewed]

I dissociated at Sams Club today. My anxiety was really high and the store was crowded. My Brother and my Mom we’re finishing up at the cafe and I needed to leave so I walked around the store. I could feel it happening too. It was kind of like I was leaving my body but not as intense as it was a couple weeks ago. I had my drink with me which was just some zero calorie flavored water. I don’t know why this keeps happening. I still don’t have a therapist. I’m sort of worried about mentioning it though. I don’t want to be diagnosed with something.

we're off shopping today to get our christmas food

hope everything we want is in stock

we also showered today and feel disgusting

yesterday I went to do my christmas shopping (for my christmas dinner)

it was lovely to see that so many people were in the christmas spirit- with a lot of them wishing me merry christmas as they passed me by

I wasn't able to get everything I needed, but most things.

[dlantern]

Currently being inundated with folks just wanting to over lap constantly at the limits of their understanding. #Over crowed issue