Is this normal after an EMDR session?

I wasn't really sure which forum to post in so I apologize if I choose the wrong one.

Today was my first EMDR session with my therapist who I have been seeing for two months now building a relationship and resources with. She is my first therapist too. I sought out a therapist for some overwhelming anxiety and panic attacks. At first I denied any "trauma" but overtime I eventually opened up and admitted to child hood sexual abuse and verbal abuse.

So fast forward to today-

Today was my first EMDR session. I guess it went ok. I really have no clue and was kinda more confused than anything. At first when I brought up the negative beliefs I became emotional but then I very quickly just kinda tuned everything out and with the bilateral stimulation I just let my mind go blank. I didn't really think about anything. No emotions. My question really is more about after. So far all day since then I have just felt numb. Completely numb. I cant really focus on anything and I feel like I am observing myself doing everything. Almost like my body is a shell and I am just watching from inside. I remember feeling like this when I was younger but I just cant seem to shake it today. Is this something normal to expect? I know my therapist said I might experience more emotion or processing but I feel like I kinda have just turned off and am functioning on auto pilot.

Hi there and welcome to the forum. I have EMDR and do well with it. How people experience it is individual , did your T do mindfulness / grounding / safe place with you? Whatever is coming up following a session usually only lasts a couple of days and then settles down. Can you contact your T for reassurance and some helpful techniques ? I use the " my calm beat " app - my T recommended it

As Out There said, each person will have different experiences. But my T told me that throughout the week I would continue to process so to expect a little more emotionality but that if I did, to practice my safe place. Good luck, I hope it works as well for you as it does with me.

This is what happens to me. I ask T about it all the time. She doesn't explain, she just says let it be what it is and let her know whatever it is. It is different for everyone. I always feel like I have no idea of what went on and the zombie exhaustion. It goes away after a little bit but sometimes I now look forward to that calm/slow/empty feeling (so to speak).

She had me do my container and safe place after the session. We didn't actually complete the whole session due to time and it took me forever to come up with positive words. I found it very frustrating more than anything.

Thanks! So far I am not so sure this is for me. I found the process very frustrating and I have always had a hard time finding words to describe my emotions and I spent way too much time trying to do that and we ran out of time. That was the most frustrating part.

Ask your therapist about a concept called, "Window of Tolerance" . One of the symptoms of PTSD is numbing, also called, "hypoarousal". Conversely, some people have too much arousal, "hyperarousal", which often shows up as anger, anxiety, panic, mood swings, etc. Everyone responds a bit differently to trauma.

Thank you! I will. I have a list of questions. My next appointment is in 5 days. This has been very interesting so far.

I didnt realize you were doing emdr. I am not a fan of emdr. A t friend tried to explain it to me. Your and littlepage description sounds like dissociation to me. I am more comfortable with a process like that of mouse and her stellar t. Thats one i can follow logically and understand.

We use the pulsars to help ground sometimes. We have only done an official emdr session twice. I have too much dissociation right now to use it. She's an emdria instructor as well as a certifier. Most of our sessions are talk based, if I talked more about my therapy I'm sure you'd be able to follow it. I just keep it close to me. There is a lot about me I'm embarrassed to talk about and ashamed of, trying to get past that.

What process is that? Just wondering.

More psychodynamic.

Sorry, I didnt mean to intrude.

You didn't!

Sounds like you need more time in the preparation phase (Phase 2)! YOU ARE IN CONTROL OF EMDR THERAPY!!! So make sure you and your T spend lots of time in one of the initial EMDR therapy phases (Phase 2) which involves preparing for memory processing or desensitization (memory processing or desensitization - phases 3-6 - is often what is referred to as "EMDR" which is actually an 8-phase method of psychotherapy). In this phase resources are "front-loaded" so that you have a "floor" or "container" to help with processing the really hard stuff, as well as creating strategies if you're triggered in everyday life. In Phase 2 you learn a lot of great coping strategies and self-soothing techniques which you can use during EMDR processing or anytime you feel the need.

In phase 2 you learn how to access a “Safe or Calm Place” which you can use at ANY TIME during EMDR processing (or on your own) if it feels scary, or too emotional, too intense. One of the key assets of EMDR therapy is that YOU, the client, are in control NOW, even though you weren’t in the past, during traumatic events, or whatever disturbance(s) on which you’re working. You NEVER need re-live an experience or go into great detail, ever! You NEVER need to go through the entire memory. YOU can decide to keep the lights (or the alternating sounds and/or tactile pulsars, or the waving hand, or any method of bilateral stimulation that feels okay to you) going, or stop them, whichever helps titrate – measure and adjust the balance or “dose“ of the processing. During EMDR processing there are regular “breaks” and you can control when and how many but the therapist should be stopping the bilateral stimulation every 25-50 passes of the lights to ask you to take a deep breath and say just a bit of what you’re noticing, anything different, any changes. (The stimulation should not be kept on continuously, because there are specific procedures that need to be followed to process the memory). The breaks help keep a “foot in the present” while you’re processing the past. Again, and I can’t say this enough, YOU ARE IN CHARGE so YOU can make the process tolerable. And your therapist should be experienced in the EMDR therapy techniques that help make it the gentlest and safest way to detoxify bad life experiences and build resources.

Yes, the preparation phase is extremely important, hence why I can't do EMDR sessions at the moment. We are still working on feeling safe and staying grounded.

I agree. I felt prepared. We have been building resources for the past 6 weeks. My therapist told me I was 100% in control of it. I was the one who wanted to try but maybe I was too eager. I lost the image when I was asked to rate it. Then with the bilateral stim I just blanked out. Couldn't even get myself to bring it up.

My surreal numb feeling is fading now and I actually have had a few more images resurface.

That sounds promising and reminds me of early in my EMDR when there was still a lot to process. I kept a log of what came up , images and memories.

So it kinda just hit me today but part of the reason that I had such a hard time coming up with positive cognitions is that deep down I have this rediculous belief that I dont have the right to have them. It wasnt that I didnt believe they were true but because I seem to have ingrained in myself that I dont deserve. I dont know why but this realization has made me so happy.