Roll Call 59

Going camping in a few days, can't wait! Should be lots of fun. I might bring my kindle to read at night but the only book I'm reading right now is "It" by Stephen King and I don't want to spook myself out in the woods lol

i had a genetic test done. the only thing i remember was it said i had a VAL/VAL comt. dont ask me what that means, lol. it said invega would work for me and it does, so thats cool. oh, also it said something about how i don't have enough serotonin receptors.

im sorry you don't respond to meds. i can't imagine that. it took me a long time to find the right ones. its such a painful process and i felt like a guinea pig. i dont know if ur in therapy or not, but it has helped me probly more than anything. i would give it a shot if you can. from what i have read of some of your other posts it seems like you have had trauma in your past. this is the case for me. i have complex PTSD from it. my T and i are fairly certain that my psychosis comes from that. thru working with my T on coping skills and processing trauma (we still work on that bc i am kinda avoidant about it since i am prone to breakdowns and dissociation) i have become so much more stable and functioning. i used to go into the hospital every 3 months during psychotic/suicidal crises. i used to hoard my meds and flush them down the toilet and lie to T and tell him i was fine (which he always knew i wasnt). i couldnt hold a job for more than 2-3 months and completely stopped working altogether. i tried school so many times but always dropped out. these days i take my meds every day. i dont lie anymore about my symptoms. i am rarely suicidal. i get mild psychotic symptoms but nothing like it was before. ive held a job for 1.5 years and was even offered a promotion, and ive been succesfully going to school for a while now. i have faith that most everyone can recover. sorry to turn this into my life story saga but i just want to say that therapy has helped me the most with all of these things. not saying the meds dont do anything, they most certainly do.

i hope you look into therapy

They just approved it...brexpiprizole.

Junk, thanks for sharing your recovery story! I needed to hear something positive today.

That sounds so fun

i got into a fight with that girl.

all i asked from her was if she could pay me gas money for driving her everywhere she wants me to drive her. then out of nowhere she says "your on disability but you can work" and i got really pissed and started cussing at her. she really doesnt know my situation. ive only been in school for 6 months and only been in recovery half that time. im not ready for work. i still have symptoms. im trying to goto school to get a better life and job yea but to see how i handle stress. she doesnt get it.

idk why she pulled that out of her arse but all i asked for was for gas money for all the rides i give her. im not public transportation. i have to give rides to everyone and im sick of it so i started asking people for gas money beCAuse im on disability and my gas tank lowers faster than ever before giving people these effing rides.

dont mean to sound rude, but is your dad deceased? my dad died when i was 10 and the SSDI that i get is his. it's called survivor's benefits. since i clearly didnt work enough to get disability and since he died before i was 18, i was awarded disability because i was deemed disabled since age 16. i got approved in like 4 months

Yes he is. Both my parents are. I don't know how the process works that's why I have my neighbor. It's been confusing.

ur welcome. i dont want to sound like im "THERE" yet, you know? cuz im not. i have a ways to go still. but i feel it is important to look back on where i've come from and to feel proud of that, and acknowledge what helped me get here and what didnt

oh ok. sorry to hear that. i hope you are approved

people should give u gas money, thats respect and common sense. it wasnt rude to ask her for it. but what she said was rude

so i had my first day back at work in a week/since my grandma died. at first it was hard and i felt angry and i didnt want to be there. but i got into my groove and put my smiley/normal face on and survived. oh, also, i had an evaluation done at work and the manager went over it with me. he said i did a good job, that im an asset to the front end and i do my share of the work. on the comments section he said they want to see me become more of a leader and help guide the other cashiers into staying busy during down time since im always staying busy and not standing around looking bored. i was nervous abt it but it went ok, and i feel alright about what he said.

That's a great review! Congrats, that sounds like a much more reasonable increase in responsibility. Good to know they've got your back.

thanks.
i think its common sense and respect too. out of politeness to give gas money to someone who drives you everywhere for free.

she was very rude to me.

Newtus: You shouldn't even have to ask for gas money, it should be a given. If I'm ever going anywhere with friends, even family, I always give a few quid towards gas.

What do they say... ***, grass, or pay for the gas - nobody rides for free.

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I don't want to start a new thread but I was just wondering how much do you all sleep at night? and do you attribute this to meds?

I sleep roughly 11-12 hours a night and I blame my depot somewhat. I used to be grand on 6-8 hours but now I'm exhausted if I don't get at least 10.

Afternoon!

I roughly sleep 12 hours a night at the moment but I go to bed at the shocking time of 8:30pm... I occasionally stay up later but most the time I am just too tired. I blame it all on my medication... normally I would be sleeping around 8-9 hours going to bed at a more normal time. I seem to be quite sensitive to the sedating properties of APs... I got sedated on both Abilify and Amisulpride which are meant to be two of the least sedating around plus I'm not exactly on a large dose at the moment.

9 or 10, but I've slept that my whole life with the exception of when I was psychotic which was more like 2.

Lately around 3 hours. Last night I got none.

I'd like to blame my oversleeping fully on my meds but I'm not sure if the fact I'm not working and generally have nothing to do has an impact on my sleep. Like I'm not energized throughout the day and I don't have anything to get up for in the mornings. I'm wondering do people have the same issue?

All I do mainly is sit on my bed and I'm definitely not energized and sluggish but I still can't sleep most nights. I don't know why. Last night through this morning I had horrible restless legs too.

I usually have a problem getting to sleep, it can take up to 4 hours for me but once I'm asleep I could sleep for Ireland. When I asked my doctor why I couldn't get to sleep he said it was because I was doing nothing all day and you're body isn't tired and is wired from looking at a computer screen all day. This could be your problem too. You could try get out for a long walk to tire yourself out. When I wasn't sleeping at all before, I tried exercising as much as I could be bothered and it did help!

I can't go for a walk because of my back but maybe I could try to be more active in my apartment. I am guilty of an internet addiction and I always have a phone in my hand! Can't stop!

Omg. I just found my phone. It was outside on the ground. It's been there since last night. I'm so happy no one stole it.

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