Roll Call 62

What kind of group are you attending? I seem to have forgotten.

It's called Illness Management Recovery, there's only a couple of us. A therapist runs it, we just each talk about what's going on in our lives and how we're doing, offer support etc. Then we do arts and crafts or play games

Morning guys!

I hope your group goes well Blue_Bird....

Really feeling like an Autumn day here today... cool & windy.

Hi everyone! Got up late, missing group tomorrow to go to the Irish National Ploughing Championships up the country. Never been but I've heard it's a bit of a laugh. Just hope the rain stays away!

What's everyone up to?

Oh I see. I do hope it benefits you, it seems so as you mention that you have continued to go.

I go to a depression and bipolar support group twice a month. Though I do not suffer from either of those illnesses, that group is open to anyone suffering from any kind of mental illness. It has been nothing but beneficial to me, as there are so many issues that are common to any kind of mental illness. I have also had the opportunity to help the people who have psychotic features to their bipolar disorder or occasionally depression to understand the nature of psychosis and how it works better(I've done so much research on Schizophrenia and any disorder that can cause psychotic symptoms so much it's ridiculous, and I've studied the topic of psychosis in general in much depth so needless to say I know what I am talking about).

I'm not up to much, I am still a bit sick I've got some kind of cold pfft so I'm taking it easy. I do have to go to the dentist this afternoon though, I am not looking forward to that lol.

I'm just over mine, absolute nuisance of a thing those colds are. Do you need any fillings or anything? Or is it just a check up?

They are a nuisance indeed!

I don't need any fillings as far as I know, it's just a check up. One of my teeth has been hurting, it's the same one I already had a root canal on though a couple of years ago. I hope something else isn't wrong with it, that would be right annoying as feck(I love "feck", I've started saying that all the time because of you lol you corrupted me and I'm not upset about it! )

Hopefully there'll be nothing wrong with it, the nerve should be dead so it could be a tooth beside it causing the pain. Good luck with it anyway,

Ah Feck, I love that word so much!

Morning guys, I'm just getting ready to go to my second job at the animal shelter. Had a lovely morning of coffee, toast with sausages, and dancing like a white girl on too much caffeine. Hope you guys have a great day. Enjoy the Ploughing Championships, Chickenfoot. That does sound neat.

Good morning ^^

Took one too many caffeine pills. With my coffee...

A bit of tachycardia. If I'm ever going to get off the Prozac, I'm not doing it without benzos or propranolol. Highest I recorded when I stopped was 240bpm. At that time it was 150-160bpm on average. It was horrible.

You know when you're on too much stimulants when you get tired and want to sleep. Pretty sure it's like that on meth/coke overdose..

I've got a sore tooth at the moment too. I've been debating or not whether to make a dentist appointment as I'm with a private dentist & have to pay. It's only mildly sore when I touch it with my finger or push it with my tongue, not when I eat or anything so I figure I'd just a wait a bit to see if it goes away.

i cut my finger pretty bad last night when i was cutting up that orange. it doesnt need stitches but it did bleed a lot. and its really swollen. i put some peroxide on it. i asked T if he had a band aid but he didnt. i saw T, it went ok. we were talking about how much i think hes dead. he wrote out a bunch of stuff on some paper as we were talking about it. i have it now. we were writing down the process of how i end up believing that hes dead. he also said something about how i am attached to him emotionally and how it relates to my dad. i am attached to my T and he knows that, i have also told him i love him (not in a romantic way). i never really thought of the him dying thing in regards to that. i told him i feel like i have to obsess about him being dead in order to prevent it from happening. he said he really appreciates that i try to protect him. i also told him about some ******** at work and about my last exam that i did bad on. i didnt do that bad but it really disappointed me when i tried so hard. i felt like i didnt wanna leave Ts office and go back into the real world... he asked me if i am gonna come to their board game night. i work tonight 4 to 9... also i am eating a sandwich. to keep my blood sugar up.

I have a lot of anxiety. I got a robocall from that rotten clinic this morning telling me to make an appointment. This probably means he won't refill enough Abilify to last until October 15th unless I go in. I hate that place. This means I have to practice walking in here much more so I can go anywhere. I'm too scared to walk. My legs feel weak and like Jelly.

Group was great! I can tell the new therapist running it has a lot of energy and will do lots of projects with us. We got a new room in the clinic, the old one was a small meeting room with just a table but now we have a huge room with a kitchen in it and everything. We may start having breakfast there and cooking if we get more clients to join

im depressed

Do you know why?

I'm kind of down myself because I haven't seen the guy I'm dating for too long and it's making me sad.

no. well,, its probly pms. i texted T that i am getting depressed and he said stop!!! . well i also wrote something about how i think the members of our group think im pathetic and they are nice to me bc of that. because T said today during session that they like me. so thats why i said that.

it feels like theres a hole in my chest. i have to go to work which sucks

why havent u seen your boyfriend? just been busy?

Oh...have you had cbt because that sounds like a negative cognition about the group....I'm sure they like you and if they don't well then they don't deserve to know someone as awesome as you.

That sounds bad

His work schedule got changed to nights and most weekends which is when I'm off.

I'm isolated myself and avoided everyone because my negative symptoms were so bad. Also where I live which is in the middle of no where. 4-5 years of isolation. I used to just sit at home in a sun chair drinking whiskey with benzos eventually. Idk I feel terrible at the moment now in how I can't be independent. Probably by law idk.

Everyone is trying to help me to do stuff. Keeping me active because my summer job was really good. I always got ready in time and got out of bed. I do really well with routines.

I'm doing a bit better now

I need a drivers license and if no one wants to pay 1k a month for my apartment (Which is unlikely), I'll move in, work part time and continue with my schooling.

I'm going to be signing papers today so my mom has complete control over everything. I regret signing the other papers but whatever she'll say I can't be independent yet uhhh

If I finished highschool, I would have moved out already.

I'm planning on getting an activity for the Halloween season for group, either buying a bunch of baby pumpkins for the group to paint or these pumpkin wood cutouts https://www.etsy.com/listing/2420784...hape-laser-cut It will be fun!

I vote baby pumpkins---I love those things----

just got back from my therapist. she helped me figure out what to do about either living near the university or driving. i forgot what she said. she wanted to talk about my mom at first and i told her i didnt want to talk about her. that its a sensitive subject. i forget what she said because i get really nervous being there and always correct my behavior and talk correct and clearly.

What's everyone up to tonight?

I'm watching Beyond Scared Straight and it's making me cry.

What are you up to?