Roll Call 144

Yes please angelique

Tweaky... sometimes it's hard to follow you when you get into philosophical rants but i want you to know i'm listening. not sure what to say.

Me too Desoxyn. You're too smart for me but I read what you write.

I feel like my AP makes me dumber. I think I used to have thoughts. Now more and more I just feel like a vegetative zombie.

i felt that way when i was on other aps. but geodon doesn't make me feel that way. it's not sedative and i'm not feeling like i wanna sleep all the time. it feels good. it helps with my delusions but my hallucinations are nonstop.

Been feeling tired for days.. I think I’m depressed cause my frontal lobe hurts. Have no reason to be depressed though so I feel bad. I want to go off AP.. not a good idea. My doctor doesn’t want to switch Olanzapine cause it works wonder for my psychosis. But I’m tired of feeling tired.

I agree....but having full psychosis is a worse choice.....

what all aps have you tried. i know ability usually makes people feel more awake. Geodon isn't as sedative but it doesn't help much with hallucinations. abilify just felt like i wasn't on it at all.

I know soz and thanks but what I'm really trying to say is that I need to have faith in what I'm thinking and saying. I see myself as too young to know anything. And most adults are older than me so they have experience. But experience with what? Don't I have things to say that can resonate with someone?

I was talking to a woman in the hot tub with my mom today and my mom wanted me there because this womans daughter has an alcohol problem with possible psychosis. I gave a little insight but mostly I think she just wanted me to be there for her to listen.. although what I'd say, after all the drugs I've done.. it's deeper than that.. And I have to have faith that a lot of what people talk about, there's a deeper meaning to it that I can't talk about because of stigma and just the construct order of the way that culture is set up where I live.. I'd love to travel the world and see different cultures like how it's normal to talk about sadness etc in Portugal but also that's the place where all drugs are decriminalized... that brings my theory to something..

There's so much stigma about everything and what is being taught in schools is to not be offensive. My teacher said "Rape is natural for men" and it's also "Natural to terminate a baby" and that can be offensive to the man etc stuff like that.

I just wonder how offensive things can be and that maybe I need friends that are racist because it's hard to find people that are funny (Like you and some people here) where I can say things out of the ordinary...

I think I need friends that are like me in real life where I'm not afraid to say what's on my mind. I've never said what's on my mind. People always told me to shut up when I was a kid and before people thought I was hilarious.. it's different ways that things go and the cluster of colours in the world.. I can't take it... I can't become my own mind.. I think too much.

Abilify, Haldol, Risperidone, Seroquel, and 1 more that I can’t remember. I am not sure Geodon will help but I want to try Latuda, but afraid of the price as I don’t have any insurance. Also my doctor’s solution for the sedative effect of Olanzapine was to give me Concerta, which made me paranoid.

Latuda is $1200 a month here....

Insane

there's no such thing as thinking too much... but there is such thing as thinking the wrong way. sometimes people think themselves into a depression and it's really not what it all seems. stigma sucks... point blank... people are afraid what they don't understand. when i'm in a mental hospital i feel understood by the other patients. we become friends but when we leave the hospital we never contact each other again. it sucks but i think it's because they don't want others to know they were in a psych hospital.

Ignore those 3 posts cuz I just wanted to talk to myself but it's cool that some people listen.

^_^

i hear good things about latuda but i think it's fairly new so it's more expensive. prices for atypical antipsychotics are expensive while typical antipsychotics are dirt cheap. have you tried other typical antipsychotics other than haldol? maybe thorazine?

I take seroquel and vraylar, with my other meds. another increase soon.

I'm just glad I haven't had horrible side effects. I am always afraid of something really bad happening. Vraylar is expensive as hell, isn't generic yet, came out in 2016 I guess. My insurance covers it with a prior authorization I guess

after what happen with the haldol with me i refuse to take anymore typical antipsychotics.

I've never taken any of the typical APs, I've heard they have a ton of bad side effects but can be effective

My bad experience was with a moodstabilizer. Ended up in the ICU for a week, organ failure. Now I'm terrified everytime I start new meds or things are increased

i'm on a mood stabilizer. lamictal and i'm on a low dosage. i didn't know moods stabilizers can cause organ failure. that's scary.

No I haven’t. Old generation AP is kinda scare me though..

i don't blame you. i had bad side effects on them. i don't think i can tolerate them.

It's was kidneys. I was on Lithium. My dose was extreme though. My doctor didn't know wtf she was doing apparently and just kept increasing it. I had severe toxicity with 4.6 levels. I went in and saw her several times shaking like I had parkinsons and walking around looking like a drunk person hardly able to talk and her response was to increase it... anyway, it's highly unlikely for that to happen or get to that point. I just ended up calling an ambulance one night because I knew something was very wrong and she wasn't doing anything about it. I don't really have much memory of being in the hospital. Just a few brief flashes, having a seizure.

Not trying to scare anyone, just what happens when you have an extremely incompetent doctor, not necessarily a flaw with the medication

Yeah I was considering mood stabilizers and my pdoc was like well you’ll have to be much more careful with your bloodwork if we go that route.....it’s standard to get bloodwork when titrating those....

Yeah, she did bloodwork a couple times but not enough apparently, couldn't keep up with her increasing . I just think 1800 mg is a crazy dose for someone who weighed about 105 lbs at the time.

I was on Depakote and had no problems got proper bloodwork, now trileptal and no problems, doesn't require regular bloodwork