Roll Call 167 :)

Maybe you should think about revisiting that Clozaril thing again. What was the reason they gave you?

What falcon just said

Sorry I’m too lazy to type it out

Right now I'm on Rexulti 4 mg. I also take generic Cymbalta 60 mg, Trintellix 20 mg, Vyvanse 60mg, Xanax .5mg as needed up to 4 a day, Lunesta as needed, Imitrex generic as needed, Some sort of statin medication 10mg and various supplements when I can take them. I hate taking them.

I “wrote” a couple of snippets....when I was hallucinating them....could hear them perfectly but never before that moment. One was like Indian another was classical like a whole symphony...yet when I listen to classical I can’t even tell you what the instruments are....lol

Well, actually got out on the bike for the first time in probably weeks. 25 miles. I normally do about 150 miles or so a week, but it has been nothing since I have been feeling so crappy. So not good for me. I was incredibly slow and my breathing sucked, but hey, at least I did something besides sit in my chair and feel shi**y.

Maybe I can write a little before bed. That would make this a really good day for me.

It’s a very tasty popsicle based mostly on fruit....

Can you ask your pdoc if you can just take your full dose of geodon at night like i do? I don't have any issues doing that. I take 120mgs at around 6-7pm and it works fine.

Yes, although used interchangeably with helado

I’m taking VRAYLAR but I need to try it at night yes! Sp said the same

You remind me of my cousin a bit...she runs though and used to do ultras before injuring herself. For her the exercise actually helps stop her GAD and PTSD. All the cousins seem to have have some sort of MI and we all deal with it differently. But anyway my point was going to be see the biking as medicine if you feel like 💩 make sure you get out and cycle(if you can).

MI seems to run in the families of a lot of my friends, but not mine.

For us there is a clear line on my dad’s side, my grandma used to hear voices with high anxiety and my great grandma saw spirits but both were fine stay at home moms as was the tradition those days. But this seems to strike mostly the women. Even my aunt listens to a noise machine to drown out the voices at night.

You could have had a random mutation or maybe people in your family don’t talk about it?

Work went well, i had cake work again today, i hope i keep on getting spoiled like this. Anything to get away from that 3.5 story apartment house. I got two books in the mail, i have a ton still on the way. I don't think i'll have much time until winter though, but just discovering a new intellectual was nice, and that his lectures are on youtube. I'm very fortunate to have found him by change.

I think I might just write a blog post on romanticism and leave it at that for quite some time as I read these other interesting characters of german romanticism because that's where the soul of the movement seems to be and that is going to take some time to go over primary source material. German thought is quite unique the more I dive into it, all because they never had a renaissance.

I saw an old friend at the paint store, it wasreally great to see him. Really great. My old boss retired and his daughter is running the company, which is kind of crazy.

Anyway, this weekend I will write my blog post on romanticism and it's going to be a nice change to write on an intellectual topic again. Its about time I articulate another period that really had an impact on me like no other era did except greek of course.

My dad says he sees visions sometimes and they come true. I do too. But my dad has never dealt with mental illness in his life except for depression and anxiety after my mom left him.

My mom tho! Swear she has BPD. I also found out my sister sleep walks and was hanging halfway outside of a window in the middle of the night cuz of it. She has sleep issues. I also noticed she stares into space sometimes. She’s always done that.

Oh, So, what about maybe upping the Rexulti a little?

Upset with my therapist

If anything, my Moms the culprit. Lmao.

The max dose for that one is supposed to be 3mg so.....

Did you txt her to clarify?

Yea haven’t heard back but she usually don’t text back right away cuz it’s her second phone.

100% of my visions have come true. I hate them. I wish I had never had them.

My metformin came in the mail today so I'm starting it tomorrow

I can't wait till I get my sisters cat over here!