Roll Call 186

Yes, I can attest to Abilify's AD qualities. Amazing, really. I was in the throes of a depressive episode earlier this year and Abilify helped me get out of it. Really amazing.

I'll see about that when I talk to my doctor next month

I should be able to come off the rest of the perphenazine next month, then maybe come off the wellbutrin as well. Then I'd just be on zoloft, trileptal, abilify, and thorazine

Has anyone heard from Angelique ?

I seem to be more productive at night as well, when I was taking college classes that's when I did most of my studying and assignments. I'd stay up drinking coffee and doing that. During the daytime I don't have as much motivation

I scheduled my ride for 2pm,for my appointment which I thought was at 2pm, they picked me up at 1pm and when I got there they told me my appointment wasn’t until 4pm to get my injection. I was going to reschedule till next week but my care manager is going to pick me up and bring me there later today

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This guy from social media who has a blog. I think he's stalking me. He's creepy. I Unfollowed his BLOG. Next he's going to be on my face book like those other two. Gross.

Well my care manager now said she can’t take me so I’ll have to reschedule my injection to sometime next week

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Can you take an Uber or lyft? I know how much you need this.

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I don't have money right now and my care manager already had me call the nurse and ask to reschedule

I've been stress eating myself into oblivion the past couple days. Today wasn't a good day. I'm just going to go to sleep soon and hopefully tomorrow will be better. I feel like **** emotionally and physically

Only 1 event triggered my PTSD the past 4 months. I think it was just me being on a toxic social media platform for me. I should have just never joined. Thank god I'm off it, i feel like a great weight is off me.

While I was riding the dragon yesterday I dived into my trauma as deep as I could. Most of my trauma is just a paranoid delusions and guilt, in other words it was over thoughts, that's it. I can forgive myself over thoughts. I still have to work on identifying my bodily reactions and emotions as I come to understand them, to identify them. It reawakened my mental emotions guys. It's amazing. I felt so much love. I could literally feel it in my brain working on my mental emotions. 9 years and saturday it reawakened everything, friends. Everything was so moving, so beautiful. I reread a few of my favorite poems, listened to all my favorite songs. This reawakaned my old self. The 9 year nightmare is beginning to end.

I'm sorry, BB Sleeping is a good reset. Have you read anything good lately?

Still feeling the love <3

Thanks Job, I'm currently making my way through the complete works of H.P. Lovecraft

Dear God, let me know how that goes, that sounds pretty cool! HBO has a show called Lovecraft COuntry that's pretty cool, based on his mythos.

I love cosmic horror.

Although the thing I really didn't like about Lovecraft when reading through his complete works was how absurdly racist he was, even for the time period. If you can get through that though there's so much good ****.

Seeing my psychiatrist today. Hopefully we can figure out some other med I can go on besides the Klonopin since the Klonopin causes bad side effects and I shouldn't be on it long-term.

So I kinda wanted to update y’all

I’m on haldol injections now. Which you know.

But I’m on my second cup of coffee today and I feel fine. No stomach pain and no anxiety.

I looked up the vraylar side effects and it seems to have caused gastritis in me. I could only take a few sips of coffee and I would feel like I was dying. Even with some foods and other drinks too.

So that’s interesting.

So yesterday I was battling anxiety all day. I meditated and tried distracting myself with ice cubes. I journaled and called my sister for a distracting chat. She suggested I eat something as I had been fasting and fasting can cause anxiety. I tried it and it worked. Calmed right down. We both decided not to fast for the rest of the month as we are having a rough time. (We both lost pets in recent weeks and the change of new pets is stressful.)

My new dog continues to settle in although she didn't eat much yesterday and this morning (so far). It's apparently common for a newly adopted dog to do this although she ate all last week. It could be the new food too. Plus the vet has me mixing in a probiotic which she may not like so I'll try going without it tomorrow if she doesn't eat today.

I'm going to do a lot of meditating today and practice my drawing. I had breakfast this morning so hopefully that will keep the anxiety at bay. I hope so because I'm not functional when I'm facing it.

Hope everyone here has a peaceful day.

Glad you can drink coffee again, I can't imagine my life without coffee.

Me neither!!!

Dealing with some agoraphobia today

First time in a week that I had a strong morning coffee. It is similar to dopaminergic stimulants. Wakefulness, focus, euphoria..

I am really sad today. Don't really know why.