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#501
Mar 24, 2023, 11:13 AM
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Dum Spiro Spero IC XC NIKA |
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#502
Mar 24, 2023, 11:36 AM
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Saw the doctor this morning. Told him I was feeling better with like my mood and eating. That I went back on the lamotrigine after I saw the allergist a couple weeks ago.
I told him I felt like I was wasting everyone’s time with this rash thing. But he saw that my blood test showed an immune response. So he’s going to run some more testing. Says it could be a false positive but there’s a chance I might have drug-induced lupus from the lamotrigine. Which really isn’t something I wanted to hear (I laughed like Jesus this is just what I need right now). I do another blood test in like two weeks and then I see my doctor again the next week for the results. I told my doctor I wouldn’t worry so much about it right now but he knows me I have to Google everything. I tell my mother stuff about my medical but I’m not telling her until we know anything from the other tests because I know she will really worry. Anyway, I see the psychiatrist on Wednesday. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk |
 SlumberKitty
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#503
Mar 24, 2023, 11:58 AM
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Oh Wow! cogladaid! That sounds scary! I hope that it turns out not to be that. I would worry too though and Google! Talk here if it helps. We care! HUGS Kit
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Dum Spiro Spero IC XC NIKA |
 cogladaid
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#504
Mar 24, 2023, 01:04 PM
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Quote:
Sent from my M8L using Tapatalk
__________________
“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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| SlumberKitty
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#505
Mar 24, 2023, 01:05 PM
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Hope things will be okay cogladaid
 Sent from my M8L using Tapatalk
__________________
“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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| cogladaid, SlumberKitty
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#506
Mar 24, 2023, 01:14 PM
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Thanks guys!
After some googling it seems that when it’s drug-induced lupus it usually goes away within days or weeks of stopping the medication. So while it’s a bit worrisome it’s not permanent or the end of the world. It just sucks thinking if I do have it then I have to get off of lamotrigine and go on something else. I hate med changes. I’ve been good on the combo right now. Anyway trying not to worry too much about it. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk |
| Blue_Bird, Desoxyn, SlumberKitty
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#507
Mar 24, 2023, 05:07 PM
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Those butter chicken meatballs with basmati rice were amazing
__________________
“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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| Angelique67, cogladaid, SlumberKitty
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#508
Mar 24, 2023, 05:39 PM
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At this point
I am bored. And not sure what to do.. but meditate And use psilocybin with blindfolds on But just as I wait for all these nights to come, revolving the planet spinning, flung through this pure darkness It can be scary.. But as I would sit in silence, or listen to music - In the distance, coming towards me Let my mind be one with this fractal universe As I am a pattern that knows nothing, and has everything I remember being in the mental hospital.. A note was written on the chair in front of me.. I was frustrated that I had to wait 3 days in that boring hell To see a psychiatrist But now it's okay.. There there. Quiet, I wish silence to come to this once, non-spontaneous, analytical mind, that has become.. Infinite |
| SlumberKitty
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#510
Mar 24, 2023, 06:04 PM
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But I'm happy that pregabalin seems to work well for mood. My brother will come visit today, so all 3 of us siblings will hang out =] Last time we were together, was in Mexico (In December). So am just chill rn, doing random things. I'll make goals and have existential crises later.
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| SlumberKitty
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| Angelique67, cogladaid
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#511
Mar 24, 2023, 09:01 PM
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I googled drug induced lupus a lot and I’m left just pissed off honestly.
It wasn’t enough that I had a lymphoma scare that turned out to be sarcoidosis, a fatty liver, COVID, an anorexia relapse, a problem with lithium - had to have something else. Finally I’m getting it together. Stable mood, overcoming anorexia relapse. But noooo let’s give her a rare side effect so she has to stop taking this medication which was doing great. I’m sorry I’m ranting I’m just mad at the universe. Can’t get a ****ing break. But hey - I’m getting about $840 back on my tax return. I guess that’s the only good news I get. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk |
| SlumberKitty, Sometimes psychotic
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#512
Mar 25, 2023, 09:00 AM
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I slept off my mood last night. Feeling better.
I did something I haven’t done in like over a year - I ate breakfast. Some strawberries, some blackberries, an sunny side up egg on a piece of toast (with salt, pepper, and ketchup). It was delicious. I might have breakfast more often. Ever since I started listening to my hunger cues more and recovering I’ve been so hungry. I just need to balance what I eat. Good stuff. Protein and stuff. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk |
| Blue_Bird, SlumberKitty
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#513
Mar 25, 2023, 09:06 AM
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I’m really stressed. If Foodstamps office doesn’t get back to me about rescheduling our appointment that was supposed to be on Thursday that I accidentally missed, and if we don’t have the appointment before the 1st of April my Foodstamps will get cut off. I left a message with them Thursday afternoon
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
__________________
“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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| SlumberKitty
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#514
Mar 25, 2023, 10:34 AM
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Quote:
Sent from my Nokia XR20 using Tapatalk |
| Blue_Bird, SlumberKitty
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#515
Mar 25, 2023, 05:10 PM
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Dissociating
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
__________________
“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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| SlumberKitty
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#516
Mar 25, 2023, 05:14 PM
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I feel like I don’t do a good enough job keeping my apartment clean. I don’t know if I’m imagining that or not though.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
__________________
“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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| SlumberKitty
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#517
Mar 25, 2023, 05:23 PM
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Anyway, tomorrow morning I plan on going to church. Will be my first time going in person in 3-4 years. I’m mainly going to get out of my apartment and be in an uplifting environment and listen to an uplifting homily.
I don’t really know if I’ll ever go back to being fully practicing that faith because there are some things I disagree with. But I do enjoy the homilies. I just won’t go up and get communion. I don’t think I’m doing anything wrong by doing that. That’s just what I want to do. I miss going and listening to something uplifting in person with people around. I’m alone so much of the time. It gets lonely. Anyway, after that I’m going to my friends house and we’re gonna play some board games. dungeons and dragons. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
__________________
“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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| Angelique67, cogladaid, SlumberKitty
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#518
Mar 25, 2023, 06:41 PM
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Quote:
Have fun at church! Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk |
| Blue_Bird, SlumberKitty
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#519
Mar 26, 2023, 10:23 AM
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This may sound dumb but I did something big today (big for me anyway) - I bought granola bars.
Legit been scared of granola bars and protein bars since my relapse. I know it makes no sense but alas. Hopefully I can convince myself to eat one soon. Oh and I got a different drink at Starbucks. A venti sugar free vanilla latte with almond milk. Still low calories but not as low as I usually get. I’m not even googling how many calories it is. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk |
| Blue_Bird, SlumberKitty
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#520
Mar 26, 2023, 10:29 AM
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I missed church today because I overslept and it seems my friend overslept too because we were supposed to hang out today but they haven’t messaged back and that usually means they went to sleep
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
__________________
“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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| SlumberKitty
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#521
Mar 26, 2023, 11:56 AM
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Quote:
That’s great!  Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
__________________
“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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| cogladaid, SlumberKitty
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#522
Mar 26, 2023, 11:57 AM
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I’m gonna go to one of the weekday mass services since I overslept and missed todays. They’re in the afternoons at 12:15 on all weekdays except Wednesday’s. So I’ll probably go tomorrow
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
__________________
“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi
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| Angelique67, cogladaid, SlumberKitty, Sometimes psychotic
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#523
Mar 26, 2023, 01:50 PM
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I think the rash on my face is coming back.
It probably is drug induced lupus. **** me. I’m supposed to take a blood test around April 10th then see my doctor the week after. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk |
| Desoxyn, SlumberKitty, Sometimes psychotic
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#524
Mar 26, 2023, 06:07 PM
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50 million stimulants can never keep me awake
I'm gonna reanalyze my meds and stuff.. I have no idea what's happening on the daily. Even my psychiatrist was having an existential crisis. During the pandemic. But he got through it, cuz he's very smart. I rented out a VR headset - It was fun. I'll leave soon, back on the plane. A good get away. |
| Sometimes psychotic
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| Angelique67, cogladaid, SlumberKitty
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#525
Mar 26, 2023, 06:31 PM
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The brain is a strange thing.
People can be manic.. and they don't like being treated for mania. All potential selves, every decision to be made, is wonderful - A hit of dopamine for each one. Shatter of the mind. But it's a pathology that way, leads to catastrophe. |
| cogladaid, SlumberKitty
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