What did you do right today? Part 2

I started packing up some things-- it was little but it is a start-- I just don't want to take off work to do packing and then more days for moving.. I am not even sure where we are going but time is dwelling nearer.

I got out of bed.
Last night, I put the Christmas tree and decorations away with the help of someone who was nice.
I put in for another job assignment.

i got up and got dressed instead of just laying in bed. this is after two days of awful.

Fought hard against germaphobic thoughts from an out of the blue incident that really shook me up (they're not gone mind you, but I'm down from totally freaking).
Went to psych appt.
Got in some good walking (unintentional, but still counts! ).

Not applicable.

I felt rather upset last night and it continued into work- Yes I am a bit afraid to go into work now due to what I wrote out for everyone to see-- BUT The thing I did Right today was I came home and after laying around lifeless I WROTE in my Journal- EVERYTHING- Even my Plans (I had already written my letters one to everyone, my brother and the hardest to my boyfriend).. I then started searching (THIS WAS A BAD THING BUT A RIGHT THING CAME OUT OF IT) THE RIGHT THING is what I have around it would be awful if I did not get the job done, and I THOUGHT to myself- THAT WOULD BE WORSE THAN RIGHT NOW IF I did not get the job done..... I then went and got my script that was filled, and decided to take it as suppose to-- I also went shopping for 2 things in the store- cereal and something for my boyfriend that I just saw at a good price (I got it still even though at the time i was rather upset with him) and I miss read the price or got charged double for the cereal BUT I did NOT over react and BEAT myself UP- I SAID WHATEVER- Have to look closer next time. Then I DID DO A LITTLE FUN Shopping (UNDER 20 bucks) FOR ART SUPPLIES-- I GOT CANVAS to do PAINTING (I Have not done this in forever) AND SOME BEADS FOR JEWELERY (My new found hobby before this last week)....... I HAD TROUBLE At the store with crafts DUE TO I WAS SO BLANK but I MANAGED TO GET SOMETHING that MAYBE can HELP Me KEEP GOING and NOT THINK SO BADLY and to get my mind away from work at some time.... ALSO I WAS NOT 100% BUT THE KIDS AT THE STORE MADE ME TRULY SMILE WHICH AFTER WORDS SURPRISED ME
THEN I went and saw my boyfriend AND SMILED FOR he DID write me back on the note I LEFT Him BEFORE I LEFT For the store (I HAD came home from work and then left even though still upset)... AND I TALKED TO HIM ABOUT WHAT BOTHERED ME-- I LOOKED IN MY PHONE PICTURES and Found one that was taken about 2 weeks ago of me and him smiling and being silly-- I SENT It to him, saying I WISH I COULD BE LIKE THIS ALL THE TIME AND SORRY I AM NOT-- and then I said I am sorry I got so depressed last night and was planning-- WE TALKED--- and WE TALKED Some more later (I am getting BAD THOUGHTS again on him CHEATING AGAIN BUT I AM TYRING TO NOT and REMIND MYSELF it is my fears, insecurity and other stuff-- and NOT TO THINK SO BLACK AND WHITE TRY SO HARD)....

I am sorry if that is long-- BUT it has what I have done right today even though there is bad.

I rested after a week of coughing & flu. I resecheuled an app't for next week which was just pushing toward me too fast, for how I feel now.
I decided to move forward with my M.A. studies, because it is what I do best. I forgave a few people and decided to seek new friends, even one, who can understand me and listen. 'Was kind to my dog. I arranged a swag I had sewn and designed, over my bedroom window. It will be my new happy place with trees and photos.

I left the apartment for a while to break the cabin fever.

I watered my two wilted, neglected plants, and I think they will live.

I did my one hour walk and baked banana bread.

I tried to take the focus off myself for awhile.

Did not launch trying to p/u rx today, despite it being a cluster**** of awful.

I sat right down after running an errand this morning and got to work. I've written 4 solid pages so far and expect to write another 2 or 3 before the day is out.

Shopped for groceries.
Did some housework.
Improved my frame of mind.
Felt remorse for having let myself get so dysfunctional. Somehow, I feel I have a responsibility to Do a better job of keeping it together.

not much...

i finally did it.. I put some things up to try to sell-- it is a fear of my for failure, so this is the test to try--- try to see,, sit back and see what happens

Cleaned (a bunch before noon even! )
Grocery shopped
Baked and cooked
Held (and holding!) tight on a boundary despite emotional pressure

Cooked stuff to eat.
Cleaned up kitchen and took down remainder of Christmas decorations.
Vacuumed up bits and pieces of the tree that were on the carpet in living room.
I am getting over the great sense of loss that came over me after I took the tree down.

I am trying hard to follow a diet journal babsed on our national food guidelines. It is tedious having to measure and record everything I cook and eat.

Cooked a nice breakfast.
Made some important phone calls.
Found some things to laugh about.

did 3 loads of laundry:
1 purple towels
2 of whites - did a cold prewash, bleached 'em, and an extra rinse - they are BRIGHT WHITE now and smell great! they've been setting a while, so it was worth it. getting clothes sparkly clean is like my only "womanly" skill

I attended another employment counselling session today. I walked there and back for a total of 60 minutes of walking. Now I am tired lol.

Didn't let anything upset me today ... Just rolled with the flow ...

Stayed in the moment and enjoyed little things.

Kept (relatively) cool with computer despite it behaving in many disturbing ways after some downloads. For hours, mind you. (When all I could think was, "Oh no! Don't do this! I have to be able to get to PC!" )

I finished a section of the current dissertation chapter this morning, and have only two more substantial sections to go. The finished portion of the chapter is already 34 pages long!

I will also go to my writing group meeting this afternoon and gracefully, gratefully accept their constructive criticism. I will walk to and from the meeting, so I'll get about 40 minutes of exercise out of it too.