[Noahsarcade85]

I am a 29 yr old with Bipolar disorder II. I have been struggling for years. I am medicated, but I still have episodes of depression and mania. I have lost 2 jobs because of it. My most recent firm job, I went out for knee surgery and was told not to come back because I was "not a good fit". I had been there 2 years. I should have been told after 6 months if I was not a good fit----it was a cover up because they knew I suffered with my MH illness, and my ADHD. What I don't understand Is how a person who is college educated, cannot keep a job, or find another job, and lastly, be fired for something they cannot help. It doesn't make any sense to me. Im frustrated. I am up to my neck with frustration because of past due bills, medical expenses, and looking for work. My situation is very sad. I try my best everyday to get up and do better, but every time I try, I get knocked back down. I applied for Disability (supplemental income) but I was also told by the state that I probably wont qualify. My medical assistance application was tossed around 3-4 times because no one knows what they are doing. I applied for reasons only that I need medical care for my illness. Not to mention I also have scoliosis, and a left knee ACL injury. It is unfair, and very discouraging. It seems the government does not want to help people with mental health issues who really need it.

[blue_squirrel]

Hi everyone-

You can call me Blue. I'm a social worker in my late twenties, and over the course of nine years my diagnoses fluctuated from major depressive disorder, to BP II, to depression/SAD, and back to BP II. I just started taking Seroquel again, after two years of my psychiatrist trying different medication combinations (to no avail). I'm hopeful, but I don't want to be too hopeful, in case the Seroquel doesn't click with my brain. I'd even be grateful for that "Seroquel Fog" if it stopped the depression and irritability. I kind of feel fractured as a person-as most people do not know I have Bipolar at all (if I tell people, I tell them it is depression). My husband has been more supportive than I could ask, but I don't want him to be the only person I can be "whole" with. I've read many of your introductions, and resonated with them. I feel that a place like this is what I've been searching for.

[Noahsarcade85]

Blue:
just out of curiosity, what is it that makes it hard to tell people about the BP, and just saying its depression? I just want to see if your response is the same as mine. My employers at the time looked at me like I had an extra head.

QUOTE=blue_squirrel;3926448]Hi everyone-

You can call me Blue. I'm a social worker in my late twenties, and over the course of nine years my diagnoses fluctuated from major depressive disorder, to BP II, to depression/SAD, and back to BP II. I just started taking Seroquel again, after two years of my psychiatrist trying different medication combinations (to no avail). I'm hopeful, but I don't want to be too hopeful, in case the Seroquel doesn't click with my brain. I'd even be grateful for that "Seroquel Fog" if it stopped the depression and irritability. I kind of feel fractured as a person-as most people do not know I have Bipolar at all (if I tell people, I tell them it is depression). My husband has been more supportive than I could ask, but I don't want him to be the only person I can be "whole" with. I've read many of your introductions, and resonated with them. I feel that a place like this is what I've been searching for.[/QUOTE]

[lowshoe79]

I am new on here trying to figure out how to do this

[BipolarManiac]

Hello all, I'm new here and new to forums. Lets see if I can figure this out.

I'm diagnosed type 1 bipolar disorder. I was recently diagnosed, though turns out I was undiagnosed for many years!

I've struggled to handle my diagnosis a bit. Going on and off medication.

I've been through hell and back, that's for sure!

I hope to be able to share my experiences with others, as I'm looking forward to support as well.

So far I've enjoyed my experience on Psych Central!

[InsideBlackBox]

Hi, I am a latently diagnosed Bipolar Type I. I cleaverly concealed my undiagnosed disorder since my years in nursing school. As an RN there's a certain level of mania demanded to do my job affectively. Especially, while working in ICU. This played out very well for me in my career but, my interpersonal relationships was an acceleration of erratic behaviors to destruction. It took 3 decades from onset and a very messy lifestyle that brought to a desperate state of contemplating suicide. Fortunately, I was surrounded by the right people at the bottom of my pit. When appropriate and compliance was achieved.
I have a plethora of horrific events that with my clear mind and effective treatment plan affords me to share.
I'm here to find a support group to share and learn new lessons in communication, coping skills, and starting over as a clear minded individual.
I miss my manic phases where i once thought i functioned best but, understand i did most damage.Hoping tis forum with increase my cognitive level of an knowledgeable understanding how my black box ticks.
Thank You and look forward to developing relationships from my fellow colleagues.

[LadyLeta]

Hi all I am a 28 year old single mother who was diagnosed with bipolar disorder yesterday. Between working on my second masters degree, my full time job and taking care of my son I feel completely overwhelmed by this. I have known since I was 13 that something was wrong but it was always misdiagnosed as depression.

I am happy to finally be starting treatment and getting to know all of you.

L

[wiredidiot]

My name is Brenda and I'm 51 (well perpetually 50) and was just recently diagnosed BiPolar after 9 years of on and off hell.
Horrid bouts of depression that would put me literally catatonic in bed for weeks at a time.
I'm happy about the diagnosis, but pissed at the loss of years in my life. Thankfully I have a wonderful PDoc who is wonderful at prescribing the proper cocktails of meds.
Now I think I just need to find someone for talk therapy.

Nice to meet you all!

[gubernova]

Hello everybody my name is Mike and I have Bipolar I disorder on the moderate to severe side of the spectrum. I have comorbid severe OCD, which was my original diagnosis along with depression until I had a full blown manic episode about 10 yrs ago. I am 37 and have dealt with mental health issues for over half my life now. So long that when I started, SSRI's were considered risky.
I managed to graduate from college somehow and work from home which is a blessing that I am thankful for every day. I don't think I could handle a "regular job." I have been on every med out there. All the SSRI's, anti-pychotics, benzos, mood stabilizers etc. Plus I have been on most talking therapies, ERP, ACT, etc. I have also undergone ECT three times to combat depression. I am finally in a successful relationship with a wonderful woman who accepts me unconditionally and this disorder.

My cocktail at the moment is 900 mg gabapentin (best drug ever for anxiety), 150 mg of Trazadone with 3 mg of klonopin for sleep (bad insomnia), 150 mg lamictal, 150 mg of Luvox (only SSRI that reduces my OCD), and 2 mg of Prazocin for nightmares (it kills them and I no longer fear going to sleep at night).

I humbly hope to help and support people in this forum, and receive help and support.

[InsideBlackBox]

Originally Posted by wiredidiot

My name is Brenda and I'm 51 (well perpetually 50) and was just recently diagnosed BiPolar after 9 years of on and off hell.
Horrid bouts of depression that would put me literally catatonic in bed for weeks at a time.
I'm happy about the diagnosis, but pissed at the loss of years in my life. Thankfully I have a wonderful PDoc who is wonderful at prescribing the proper cocktails of meds.
Now I think I just need to find someone for talk therapy.

Nice to meet you all!

I'm in your boat. I'm tickled by your statement of med cocktail. I feel like a walking pharmacy with all the added phyiscal aliments. A therapist is a must have. Mine has been very resourceful with homework assignments, journaling, mediation, and holds me accountable when signs appear evident during sessions.

[lacerta]

Hi everyone. I'm 29. It's been about 1.5 years since I'm acutely struggling, though I have been suffering from depression like 7 years ago.
I had two babies, one soon after the another that set me off to bipolar. At first I was misdiagnosed as postnatal depression. Then I realised I'm having manias and then came my bipolar diagnosis.
For a year I was on all kinds of medication - tried about 5 antidepressants, was sleepy carbamazepine and finlepsin, took depacote for most of the time, which made my gain weight too much.
Now I weaned myself off the meds, take vitamin D, fish oil, diet, do regular excercises, hope to be stable this way. Still regulary going to p-doc, don't dare to tell him I'm off the meds
Been in therapy for a year now, learned quit much to deal with my bipolar symptoms.

[bellenuit]

My name is bellenuit. I am a 30 year survivor of Bipolar disorder and PTSD.This is my first post here but I am not a stranger to online support. In the early days of my disorder I spent long hours with wonderful people who helped me through some very rough patches.

My issues began near age 12. I spent the next 32 years in and out of the hospital trying desperately each day to find a reason to remain on this earth for another day. I went through many medications, many therapists, and several psychiatrists. In 2009 the psychiatrist that I still see suggested I try Electroshock. While I realize this is not the answer for everyone, after trying every type of medications and countless hours of therapy I had to do something or they were going to lock me away permanently.

My life is so different now. While I still occasionally have issues with being over confident or too pessimistic also taking on too much or not wanting to get out of bed. For the most part, life is much better. My husband and I are still together (almost 23 years) and the kids are doing great (now 18 and 19). I may be out of my mind but I decided to go back to school to get my Masters. I was feeling lonely with the kids gone at class/college and out with friends I decided I really needed to keep myself busy.

My goal in coming here is to pay back (if I can in some way) the help and support given to me over the years. If anyone needs someone to listen I'll be happy to lend an ear.

belle

[galaxieguy]

Hello, I'm Tim from Chicago area and believe I'm Bi-Polar. Thought I'm being treated for depression, anxiety and Adult-ADD, I believe I'm Bi-polar due to episode of reckless behavior, primarily spending during "mania" episodes. I have an appointment with my Psychiatrist in a few weeks and will again bring up the subject about being Bi-polar. we've discussed before, but I am now convinced that I'm bipolar.

After 15 years of trying to get my medications adjusted for my other conditions, dealing with medication changes again if my physician agrees with my belief, I believe will be very challenging.

Anyway, I'm greatful for having found this forum.

[galaxieguy]

Giving this much thought today, and I'm glad I've found this forum... somehow I feel at home!

I've battled the depression, anxiety and ADD for many years and now finally realizing the real issue with me is being "bi-polar"... I don't look at it as a problem or defect - I look at it as a new opportunity to get better and be "normal" what-ever that is!

Hopefully my next visit with my psychiatrist will be open up the real issue.

[girl5983]

Hi,
I wanted to see if there was a support group for individuals with Bipolar who have issues with emotions in relationships - I have never had a successful relationship.... I start feeling for someone and then - NOTHING!!! and i can't control it - Is there a forum specific to this

[Papa]

Originally Posted by Merlin

My name is Laura and I live in western Canada. I have type II bipolar and post traumatic stress disorder. I am currently stable due to effective medication and am devoting the efforts I used towards getting well towards helping others get well too. I am a community rehabilitation worker and am taking a bachelors in social work focusing on mental illness.

My name is Larry. My son also has type II bipolar with schizoaffective disorder. I am his full time care giver. I find caring for him helps me too.

[azureskies32]

Hi I'm new here. I introduced myself on the general site yesterday. My moods are all over the place. I am finally seeing this all began with pain medication from an on the job injury. Hopefully I'll become stable again and be able to help others. I've been stable for a lot of years for the most part anyways. Thankfully I remember some of my coping skills. I sure have been in the bath tub with candles often lately. :-/ at least something is calming...

[StayinAlive]

New to the forum and hoping to be able to discuss my struggles with folks who may understand. I have been on SSRI's for many years. Was finally diagnosed with Cyclothymia about 12 years ago and with various anticonvulsants, have managed to have a successful career and keep my symptoms fairly well controlled.

Enter perimenopause. Fluctuating hormones have made everything a struggle. I am just trying to make it from one day to the next. Working closely with my psychiatrist, but I feel so alone and confused. I have had some problems at work due to uncontrolled moods.

Just struggling. Currently on Effexor XR and Tegretol.

Hope to meet some friendly people here.

[cthlyte]

Name's Dan,

Bipolar I with Rapid Cycling, currently on Lamictal, Welbutrin, and Cymbalta. Diagnosed in the past five years, been dealing with it since I was 13.

[Jackal_1984]

Hi All,

I was diagnosed with Bipolar 2 in 2010. I was forced to quit my job at the time and needed about 6 months to come out of my depression cycle. I decided to start studying for a law degree and complete it in 2013. I got married at the beginning of 2014 and started a new job too.

I had been stable till about May this year and have since gone into a depressive cycle like I had back in 2010. I'm really tired and struggle to get much done. I have negative thoughts and it feels like a constant struggle. I have discussed this with my psychiatrist, psychologist, my wife and several friends.

At the moment it just doesn't seem to be getting better and I need some form of motivation. I'm even considering changing my career as I'm not sure whether it is what is bringing me down.

[Onyx7]

Hi I am Donald. I am from southern NY. I have been dealing with bipolar 1 for 3+ years diagnosed. Not sure when i started exhibiting symptoms prior. I just wanted to check the forum out because I have been to GP, Psychiatrist, now a therapist, tried group therapy, countless medicine...but i never met anyone with Bipolar 1. Only number two and from talking to them there is not a lot in common.

[Igniris]

Hello, my name is Diana. I am from southeast Texas. I was officially diagnosed with bipolar I disorder earlier late last year, but I showed signs of it since 17. I thought talking with people with the same mental illness might have a greater chance to understand/be understood with everything with this condition more easily than my friends and family hopefully... so yeah hi

[WorkhorseDVM]

Realize now I have been bipolar since teenager. Also realize my dad was too. Still made as hell at him even though I understand better now. Being treated with Lexapro and Seroquel. Not quite ready to give up my highs but those black holes can go. Do not want to lose my job. Kinda freaked out. Seroquel knocks me out. VERY hard to get moving. I think I am in mixed mode right now so once I get moving I MOVE, but at the same time do not really care about anything including eating. Guess I do not get to keep the highs? Can they be controlled, keep the good parts? The highs have helped me get and keep jobs, til I lose my temper ... Rambling now aren't I? Oh, in my 50s now, diagnosed after 2nd huge major depression (black hole) been going into for ~1yr. Tried to hide it, self med it. PCMD started 5mg Lexapro, saw psychiatrist increased to 10mg added trazadone and I was manic in 48 hours. Stopped trazadone added Seroquel. This all since 19Aug. So now what happens? I am still all over the place.

[natural1]

Hi, I am new to this forum. I was just diagnosed with Bipolar1 last week, my doctor has me on an antidepressant, which helps a little, but I was supposed to go to another appointment today and I missed it. I am having a bad day today. The appointment I missed was my first one with a new Psychiatrist, I am guessing she was going to switch my medications....I'm not sure. I haven't had any angry outbursts since before I was hospitalized, but I did today because I just couldn't get out of bed. I got so angry with myself. Now I am feeling so down. My therapist is going to be so disappointed with me for not making it to the appointment with the doctor. My Fiance and Mother are both upset, my Mother was crying this morning because she just doesn't know how to deal with my mood swings....I just want to get better. Thank you for listening. If anyone has any advice or any comments at all, I would love to hear from you.

[faith1959]

Hello everyone! My name is Kelly. I was diagnosed with Depression, Anxiety and Bipolar. I never ended up taking my scripts for bipolar because (as stupid as it sounds) if I didn't take the medication (to me) it meant I don't have bipolar. I have tried antidepressants before. I've been on Celexa, Paxil, Klonopin (made me 10x worse), I have been on Seroquel for a short amount of time back in the day, I know there's been more but I can't think of all of them. About 4 months ago I went to a really good psychiatrist. He diagnosed me Bipolar. Prescribed me meds. I never got them. It's stupid. I know. I am engaged. We have been fighting a lot lately. I went to beauty school, graduated, never ended up doing anything with it because I'm scared of dealing with people. I'm so lost. I keep pushing friends and family members away. I literally have no friends. I don't know what to do with myself anymore. I know first step is getting to the doctors. Taking my prescribed meds. I know that. It's just...I don't want to deal with this ongoing battle for the rest of my life. I'm so tired. I wish I was normal. I'm having financial problems too. I want to visit a psychiatrist, but I really don't have the money...ughhh shoot me now please.