Random Question: Why don't WE want to shower?

Once when I took a bunch of drugs at a festival I was convinced that my (now ex) boyfriend was going to get gassed and die in the shower. He went to take a shower in the makeshift showers and I was high on drugs. I was so scared I don't even know how to tell you how scared I was. It was all from learning about the holocaust. Truly horrific. The horror of the place I went to in my mind must have only been a fraction of what it must have felt like to actually see the holocaust and live through it. Did you guys learn about it in school? How masses of people thought they were just going in to take a shower, and then instead of water coming out, they just got gassed, and were killed. It is the worst horror I've ever come to learn about I think.

Well when I am in a really stressed or (manic/psychotic break, flashback from drugs, whatever paranoid place) I go to this fear and it becomes so real it is the most scary thing ever. I think that I'll get gassed and die if I take a shower.

Other times, more 'normal day to day times' when depressed, I will only take a shower if I have to or if it has been really pathetically too long and I'm so sick and tired that I just have to make myself do it.

Other than that, just saving the earth, saving water when not depressed or not crazy manic/psychotic/paranoid/whatever it is

I thought I was just crazy!! I thought I was the only one who had trouble taking showers...I just put it off till I can't stand myself anymore. The water actually hurts when it hits my skin...weird hu? I am scared to death that I will slip and fall so I hold onto the walls and shelves all the time. I'm so glad I'm not the only one

To the best of my knowledge, people in Holocaust knew that they were taking to the gas chambers to die. They did not have any false hopes - they knew what would happen to them.

Target sells mats for the bath tubs to protect you from falls. non-slip mats - very inexpensive.

Thank you Hamster-bamster I actually have 2 in my tub right now and I've slipped several times anyway. lol Some times they just don't stick well and will slide across the floor of the tub. I've never searched it but I wonder if they have industrial strenght suction cup ones?? Maybe I'm just too fat for the suction cups to hold well.

Oh, I see. Well... if the cheap ones from Target do not do the job, let us look for an industrial strength solution.

Bubble Bath Mat with Microban | Non Slip Bubble Bathtub & Shower Mats

the company makes just non-slip solutions, so they are likely to have figured out how to make them well, or else they would have gone out of business. Unlike target that sells everything under the sun and does not depend on the quality of any one product for survival.

Hamster-bamster!!! That was so very wonderful of you!! I get paid wednesday and I will be getting me one of these!!! I'm just floored that you would take the time to research this for me Thank you I will let you know how it works out

Wow! So glad to come across this thread, really just thought I was just a total grot! (maybe I still am)

I'm not a big fan of the shower, but like the feeling of bring clean more.

One of my signs I have written on a list in my room to remind myself that I may be I'm heading up or down is "have you showered or brushed your teeth today". For some reason, the first thing to go either way is my motivation to keep on top of my personal hygiene.

I love to shower unless I'm in a real bad way. For me, I think that my mind becomes so disorganized at times that it just doesn't even occur to me to do things like shower and pick up the house. It's like I don't even notice that I have been skipping basic self care and then one day I come to and see the evidence of my illness everywhere.

It's gotten a lot better since I no longer live alone. I am more self aware having someone around, but it still happens from time to time.

Oh my gosh. I am so happy that this was here, for everyone sharing.
I thought that it was just me.
It just so much effort.
Get your robe out
Run the water
Get into the shower
Have water pelting down on your skin
Wash your hair
Get out
Dry off
Dry your hair
Gee, even writing this is exhausting

I have taken a shower every day for a full week now! First times this has happened in over 10 years. That and not spending money have been my two goals.

I find it uncomfortable and boring. I have to move the kitty litter box to get in,ny hair is very long and it takes an hour to wash and dry and I just can't be bothered . When I'm in the shower it feels good on my tight, anxious muscles, though.

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I absolutely love showers once I get in there and usually take long showers, one of my favorite things to do. However, getting in there is the problem, so I usually only shower every other day, much less if I'm very depressed. Once when psychotic, I took a 6 hour long shower (the contents of which are very bizarre)! LOL...it was late evening to early morning...my hubs was very worried.

Just wanted to say that thanks to Hamster, my showering habits have gotten a lot better than they were a few weeks ago (when I first posted). I've built up quite a varied collection of bath products, which my friends and boyfriend think are a tad excessive, but at least it's getting me to take care of at least one of those "boring" everyday errands.

I also am in debt to you and Hamster. I am always slipping in the shower and am scared of falling. I ordered one of the bath mats with the suction cups. Thanks all

I have thought about this quite often. Lately, I have been taking a lot of baths. But I don't actually 'bathe' when I take them. I mostly just lie back and relax. Sometimes cry. Mostly just hope they help ease the physical pains I've been getting as of late. I rarely actually bathe or shower to get clean. It's not even that I don't want to. I always felt small when people pointed it out, and I knew that I should. I just never 'felt' like it. If I was depressed, it required too much effort. When stable, I just... didn't. And when in an elevated mood, it didn't cross my mind (still doesn't). I have gone days.. once even weeks... without showering. And brushing my teeth? Forget about it.

I have yet to develop a satisfactory answer as to why I seem to avoid showers (and similar hygiene habits... you should hear how often my mom yells at me about brushing my hair... she sometimes reminds me 10 times in one day before I finally do so just to shut her up). The closest I've come is realizing that I hate monotony. Monotony often triggers a depressive episode. Showers become monotonous. I like the idea of having a different shampoo, soap, etc. I might have to try that.

green_jelly, what a great idea to have a list that you check in about going up or down with!

It does feel like a major accomplishment doesn't it? Reminds me of the lyric in the Dresden Dolls song that says "I took out the trash today and I'm on fire."

I think of that line when I take out the trash sometimes if I'm really depressed. It too feels like a huge achievement for some reason.

Maybe just substitute the words, and say I took a shower today and I'm on fire! (Or I'm awesome, I'm getting ***t done, accomplishing an amazing feat!)

www.epicdental.com - they make the highest Xylitol content gum. I buy it in bulk and chew many pieces a day. somehow it kills two birds at once - prevents cavities (xylitol has been proven to do that) thus compensating for less than stellar dental hygiene, and, eases anxiety because the chewing is somehow comforting.

I'm not huge on showering, but I don't think that it has anything to do with my mental state. I want to shower after mistakes sometimes, but that's it.

I am trying so hard to shower three times a week. I have set that as a goal. Baby steps will still get me to my goal....right?

I have the same goal S2M - baby steps is the way to go! It's not a sprint - it's a marathon - that's what my PDoc says.

I like that, a marathon.
Anyone ever try rewards? Something like... if I shower today, I will reward myself with.......

I also have a hard time, though the thought of not being clean bothers me at times. Even with the colors and smells it feels like work. I still take one every other day or every third day at the most.

How do you motivate yourself?
It is so darn hard