[hopeless2015]

Aww Jennifer I'm sorry. I'm sure you two will work this out soon!! Hugs!!

Went to convenient care, got a breathing treatment and prescription z pack and steroid. Got those picked up and first dose taken. Back to work tomorrow and hopefully feeling better. Doctor also told me I should be using my Ventolin inhaler 3x a day. I thought it was just for emergency...duh. mentally doing ok right now. Had a good friend I haven't talked to in awhile text me, we are going to try and get together soon. Very happy about that

[gina_re]

I made my first ever attempt at SH last night. And I have a new idea to try for tonight. I know this isn't healthy, but I have it in my head now. I slept most of the afternoon. I'm sinking. I don't have insurance right now, so I'm unsure if I can go to the hospital. I don't even know if it's worth it because I'm broke anyway, so how am I going to get any med changes?

[Sunflower123]

Do you have a Health Department where you live? They may have mental health resources to help you out since you don't have insurance. You could get samples or get patient assistance for your meds. Best wishes.

[Miss Laura]

Awww gina_re I hope you can find it in yourself to not SH tonight. Try distracting yourself. I know easier said than done. Can you call a help line?

[gina_re]

I called the psych hospital, I'm headed there when my mom gets off work. I just don't trust myself.

[hopeless2015]

Gina, yes get to the hospital!!! Sending big hugs!

[Naynay99]

Originally Posted by shattered sanity

do I want to know what an icecreamn sandwich is?

i'd say 2 bits of bread with icecream in the middle, but well, that just sounds like it would just go everywhere as soon as you picked it up

Hey shattered- this is an ice cream sandwich

[Naynay99]

Me I am doing okay. Slept late. Still have to clean.

Gina- I hope you feel better and find the hospital helpful if u go. Be safe.

[sonjaward809]

I'm new to this tread. But I've had bipolar w/ psychotic features for 7 years now.

At the moment I'm going through a pretty bad depressive episode. I barely leave my bed or eat anymore and I'm starting to see/hear things again so I'll probably be hospitalized when I see my doctor in a week. It really sucks but I think it would be best, so they can change my medications since they're obviously not working anymore. I can tell the things I see/hear aren't real so I still have insight which is great from what I've been told on here, I'm scared that I'll eventually loose that insight and not realize what's going on around me. That's one of my biggest fears, besides being in the hospital. I never had a bad experience in the hospital but I'm terrified of the "locked up" feeling.

Just wanted to vent somewhere since I can't talk to my family about what's going on. They just shrug me off or say that I'm making excuses for not working right now. They don't understand what this disorder is really like, which is odd because ALL of my brothers have either Bipolar or Schizophrenia .. I'm probably going to have the doctors help me file for disability, at least for the short time. I only have 2 friends I talk to about my issues and they're pretty understanding and just want me to be safe and happy. I'm glad I found this site because there is a ton of people who can relate to what I'm going through. Sorry it's so long

[bizi]

Originally Posted by sonjaward809

I'm new to this tread. But I've had bipolar w/ psychotic features for 7 years now.

At the moment I'm going through a pretty bad depressive episode. I barely leave my bed or eat anymore and I'm starting to see/hear things again so I'll probably be hospitalized when I see my doctor in a week. It really sucks but I think it would be best, so they can change my medications since they're obviously not working anymore. I can tell the things I see/hear aren't real so I still have insight which is great from what I've been told on here, I'm scared that I'll eventually loose that insight and not realize what's going on around me. That's one of my biggest fears, besides being in the hospital. I never had a bad experience in the hospital but I'm terrified of the "locked up" feeling.

Just wanted to vent somewhere since I can't talk to my family about what's going on. They just shrug me off or say that I'm making excuses for not working right now. They don't understand what this disorder is really like, which is odd because ALL of my brothers have either Bipolar or Schizophrenia .. I'm probably going to have the doctors help me file for disability, at least for the short time. I only have 2 friends I talk to about my issues and they're pretty understanding and just want me to be safe and happy. I'm glad I found this site because there is a ton of people who can relate to what I'm going through. Sorry it's so long

This is not too long.
Go ahead and vent! Tell us your story.
How can we help you?
(((((HUGS)))))
bizi

[bizi]

New bed comes in friday so hopefully I will have a good nights sleep before my ever so many clients in one day=9!!!!
bizi
Slept like crap last night and I only had 1 beer, my girl friend said that is why.
I have been used to drinking more.
I drank one tonight and am tired.
taking 100mg of seroquel now.
bizi

[xRavenx]

Hugs to all. Sorry to hear about those who are struggling. (((hugs))).

Today, I went through the motions, but felt this emotional weight on me. I took Klonopin after driving and feeling this tightness in my chest, from having a lot of anxiety. I've been suppressing my emotions a lot lately. It gets tiresome.

[bizi]

I took a shower today!!!!!!!
Sent out 20 bills, have to bill if I want to get paid.
The nice thing about the assisted living facility is the they schedule the visits provide room numbers and times and give me a nice check so I don't worry about billing! yeah!
Although, I really am not looking forward to saturday when I see 9 people.
I hope I sleep better on the new bed that comes on friday, hopefully!
bizi good night!

[Lifeischallenging]

Originally Posted by bizi

The lithium could be drying you out.
try to drink more water like 10 glasses a day or more.
Just curious, it sounds really expensive to go over seas for school.
bizi

Well, I've been doing research too. Some websites say its cheaper over there than here. I don't know. One thing I do know is I don't want to have to finance my education again. As for the lithium drying me out, does that happen often?

[Lifeischallenging]

Hey all, got some very unnerving news. I am going to be off my meds for a while. I have no idea how long. I got a text from my mom today while I was at work. She said the pharmacy wouldn't fill my perscription. They said it was too soon. This is going to be a rollercoaster of a ride. My work is supposed to be doing some renovations on the front, but they post poned it. Its happening in September. Very excited for that. NOT! They are trying to make my work look like Walmart.

[liveforsummer]

Slept like crap. 6 days until I'm home.
Supposed to also be planning a trip overseas with family member for next May. Really don't know if I can handle it plus dealing with time change terrifies me.
One thing at a time, I will get out of bed and do my best to enjoy today.

[bizi]

Originally Posted by TheHPEnthusiast1987

Hey all, got some very unnerving news. I am going to be off my meds for a while. I have no idea how long. I got a text from my mom today while I was at work. She said the pharmacy wouldn't fill my perscription. They said it was too soon. This is going to be a rollercoaster of a ride. My work is supposed to be doing some renovations on the front, but they post poned it. Its happening in September. Very excited for that. NOT! They are trying to make my work look like Walmart.

I don't understand how you ran out of meds?
Call the pdoc office and tell them what happened. They will help you figure it out, that is their job. Always remember they work for/with you.
good luck.
Call!
bizi
p.s. The pharmacy can help in this matter as well.
You need to take control of this matter.
Good luck at work!

[hopeless2015]

Got up, showered and came to work. Actually feel a lot better today, I think that breathing treatment they gave me really helped out!! Now to get caught back up at work...missed 2 days being sick. Still doing ok mentally

[RainyDay107]

I'm doing ok! On a beach vacation for two weeks. It's very relaxing for me.

Thinking of you all. I haven't been as active here, lately. Have had other things that I have to focus on....yet bipolar .... I wish there was an "off switch"!

[bpforever1]

I have been working for two years straight now. I only take time off when my parents come to visit me. I like working since it gives me something to do. However, some times I feel like sleeping all day and work forces me to get up. I turned down a full-time job since it entailed too much work which would have caused stress for me. Thus, I am getting by with 2 part-time jobs and also by doing free lance. I feel great and am grateful towards Abilify's effectiveness and my family and God.

[Gabyunbound]

I'm an interpreter and thus rely very heavily on my memory and an ample store of vocabulary in both languages I interpret. But my interpreting, over the last 2 years now, has suffered a great deal and it's hurting my self-esteem (and perhaps my patients, I'm a Spanish medical interpreter) to no end.

I'm afraid my meds are to blame. The only med I starting taking, when this started to happen, was Abilify, which has also been the medication that has finally and successfully brought about stability. I don't know if it can affect memory...

Or maybe it's anxiety, which has also increased over the last couple of years, that has contributed (and least in addition to meds) to my memory problems; I'm not sure.

But I used to be an exceptional interpreter, and now I'm mediocre. I have the vocabulary in there somewhere, but I forget it when I interpret and I take more notes than ever; I used to be able to interpret without taking any notes, or very few.

It's so demoralizing and I wonder if this is just going to be the way it is, that I've become a mediocre interpreter. I can't switch out the Abilify because it is THE medication that has kept me stable. It gives me the shakes and I still take it (propranolol has helped a lot with that). I just won't give it up. Or maybe it's the accumulation in my system of other medications I take.

But I feel terrible about myself. My work is wrapped up in my identity, it's always been a vocation as well as a job and I've always loved it. Until about 2 years ago. Now it's terribly difficult, and it pains me so much to occasionally see that look in patients' eyes that they don't understand what I'm saying; either because I misunderstood the original message, or because I forgot too much of what was said.

When I was hypomanic, I interpreted so fast and so well, it was extraordinary. I know there are downsides to that. But I miss it. But I'll take just interpreting 'well' at this point.

I'm so so demoralized...

[Daonnachd]

Yet again. I have ECT coming up the 16th of this month and my driver has just told me she isn't available that day. I've posted a ride request on Facebook, but got no responses. It looks like I'm going to have to push the ECT back by a week. This causes anxiety despite the fact that I'm otherwise feeling pretty good. A strange conglomeration of emotions today.

My best to all the rest of you.

@Bizi & theHPEnthusiast, thank you for reminding me that I need to go to the pharmacy.

[Guiness187055]

Originally Posted by vertigo

Yet again. I have ECT coming up the 16th of this month and my driver has just told me she isn't available that day. I've posted a ride request on Facebook, but got no responses. It looks like I'm going to have to push the ECT back by a week. This causes anxiety despite the fact that I'm otherwise feeling pretty good. A strange conglomeration of emotions today.

My best to all the rest of you.

@Bizi & theHPEnthusiast, thank you for reminding me that I need to go to the pharmacy.

Take an Uber.

[porcelainboy]

Psychiatrist doesn't want to do anything with my meds because my T3 is low again (haven't been taking my levothyroxin as prescribed, oops) so he wants me to wait another 3-4 weeks of me taking my meds normally to see if my depression lifts any. I kind of feel like I may be lifting out of it some already though, my sleep schedule has kind of fixed itself and I've had a few good days recently, today being the best.

[Sunflower123]

Saw the lap band doctor today. He said it should be no problem with insurance approving of taking it out or in actually taking it out. That's good news. He focused a lot on my bipolar diagnosis and asked a lot of questions. That annoyed and concerned me. What does one have to do with the other? It's still good news. Fingers crossed for finally getting this thing out.

Hugs to everyone.