[Aurelius710]

Job hunting today before the big snowstorm shows up.

I've been going to college and taking the student loan dump as I was thrown out of my job in a rather contentious way, but I had a grand total of 8 classes (now 4) left till I graduate). So, nice middle finger the @#$holes who fired me as I finish my schooling.

Well, my university has decided to delay disbursing that money courtesy of bureaucratic loophole that they didn't bother to implement until a day before they left for Christmas and confirmed now, three days before classes.

I can't seem to go a month without something blowing up in my face. Here's hoping the job interviews are not like that.

Found something definitely interesting while looking for a job yesterday. It's not a paid thing, but I really want to do it. They promptly emailed me back, so that was exciting. Hoping to hear more back today (and maybe interview??).

Spent for.e.ver filling out an online app for something else (paid ), and it won't let me submit it due to a bug in their system. Very frustrating. This is why I hate hate hate online applications. So I'm going to have to go there in person today and see if I can make any headway.

So yesterday just felt much more encouraging job-hunt-wise. It's usually very, very bleak for me. (To have one maybe thing is a very big deal. I'm a good worker, but possess no in-demand skills.)

Insurance-wise is a mixed bag. Yes, my psych provider (who was surprisingly in network)*does* work somewhere else too which I was able to track down yesterday. My foot is still injured and I really should have it looked at. BUT. Soon I will be either forced onto the (****) work insurance (huge deductible), or have a new job with who-knows-what. So everything will be tossed in the air again. I'm really mad at myself for not having put off taking care of my arm for so long, because now it will just be who knows how long till I can. What an idiot.

So, another busy day ahead. Trying to get as much done as possible, since starting next week, I'll have virtually no time to do anything (too much work and long commute times).

Consciously working on keeping a good attitude, as it's been a struggle. (Looking for a job is no time to tank!)

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

Went out to the movies with some friends the other night, it was a lot of fun!

I had a headache for 2 days which finally went away. Only got 2 hours of sleep last night but I'm doing well overall.

The seroquel has been great. It seems to have helped my mood too even though I'm just taking 200mg every night for sleep. I'm already on a moodstabilizer but my mood is more level than it's been in a long time. I know it's sometimes used to augment other meds. I didn't realize how out of whack it's been until feeling better.

Haven't been hearing things lately, I'm happy about that. My mind isn't racing.

It's freezing outside. 13 degrees right now with a low of 9. I had to walk to the pharmacy earlier and I was completely frozen within a minute or two. I'm staying inside for the rest of the day and drinking cocoa with my cats.

I made it onto the deans list at my college for the fall semester, very proud of myself The spring semester starts on the 22nd.

Hope everyone is doing well

I am glad to read you are doing better!

Congrats for making the Dean's List.

Stay warm!

WC

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by Innerzone

Found something definitely interesting while looking for a job yesterday. It's not a paid thing, but I really want to do it. They promptly emailed me back, so that was exciting. Hoping to hear more back today (and maybe interview??).

Spent for.e.ver filling out an online app for something else (paid ), and it won't let me submit it due to a bug in their system. Very frustrating. This is why I hate hate hate online applications. So I'm going to have to go there in person today and see if I can make any headway.

So yesterday just felt much more encouraging job-hunt-wise. It's usually very, very bleak for me. (To have one maybe thing is a very big deal. I'm a good worker, but possess no in-demand skills.)

Insurance-wise is a mixed bag. Yes, my psych provider (who was surprisingly in network)*does* work somewhere else too which I was able to track down yesterday. My foot is still injured and I really should have it looked at. BUT. Soon I will be either forced onto the (****) work insurance (huge deductible), or have a new job with who-knows-what. So everything will be tossed in the air again. I'm really mad at myself for not having put off taking care of my arm for so long, because now it will just be who knows how long till I can. What an idiot.

So, another busy day ahead. Trying to get as much done as possible, since starting next week, I'll have virtually no time to do anything (too much work and long commute times).

Consciously working on keeping a good attitude, as it's been a struggle. (Looking for a job is no time to tank!)

(((((( Innerzone ))))))

I admire your tenacity.

Thinking of you!

WC

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by spikes

Dermatology appointment went fine yesterday. She injected me with a liquid steroid and, while my shoulder still looks frightening, I'm not screaming every time I bump into something or roll over in my sleep. I have a prescription to pick up later but of course there was some BS with the insurance so it's going to take some time.

I'm still depressed. I'm "hearing" thoughts that aren't mine. I kinda just want to be on US 50 in Nevada.

Edit: Figured the insurance BS with some help and picked up my Rx. Driving feels weird today for some reason. Maybe it's my car. The tires probably need air.

So glad to read you have gotten some help from the painful rash.

WC

[Miss Laura]

I feel good like I have been for last 3+ months. However I'm drained. No matter what time I go to bed I'm just not sleeping. I'm shattered. But I'm itching to talk to guys again and have joined a dating site but in order to view messages i need to pay I'm itching to pay but a friend is saying no donr do it. I'm spawned on the sofa unable to do clean my flat. My Christmas decorations are still up it's that bad

Originally Posted by Miss Laura

My Christmas decorations are still up it's that bad

I just took mine down yesterday, and that was only because I had a program loading on the computer that was taking forever. Otherwise they'd still be up. Don't beat yourself up too much on that.
Hope you feel better soon.

embarrassing moment of the day: reaching the checkout with all my shopping, and not enough money.

had to leave my stuff at the store, go home, get some more money and rush back.

lovely and quiet in the store though and for a friday that's certainly a bonus.

[TheSeaCat]

Hello everyone I left work early because of the pain in my jaw; I guess he wasn't kidding when he said the lower wisdom teeth suck; because I have been miserable since Tuesday, granted it probably doesn't help that I have an infection; that probably isn't helping the pain. I really don't want to get the remaining two wisdom teeth pulled; the upper tooth didn't hurt this bad granted I did take a day off; which is something I didn't do with this one.

Work was alright; I'm excited for my date tomorrow; just sad that we can't kiss; I mean we could but it would probably have me yelping in pain. M has suggested maybe we postpone the dinner and movie and he just comes over and we cuddle and watch something that is already out on PPV; which I really do love that idea; granted any excuse to cuddle him is a great idea so I think that sounds like a perfect Saturday.

Hugs to everyone

[TheSeaCat]

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

Went out to the movies with some friends the other night, it was a lot of fun!

I had a headache for 2 days which finally went away. Only got 2 hours of sleep last night but I'm doing well overall.

The seroquel has been great. It seems to have helped my mood too even though I'm just taking 200mg every night for sleep. I'm already on a moodstabilizer but my mood is more level than it's been in a long time. I know it's sometimes used to augment other meds. I didn't realize how out of whack it's been until feeling better.

Haven't been hearing things lately, I'm happy about that. My mind isn't racing.

It's freezing outside. 13 degrees right now with a low of 9. I had to walk to the pharmacy earlier and I was completely frozen within a minute or two. I'm staying inside for the rest of the day and drinking cocoa with my cats.

I made it onto the deans list at my college for the fall semester, very proud of myself The spring semester starts on the 22nd.

Hope everyone is doing well

Congratulations on getting Dean's List it really is exciting to get on such a prestigious list. I screamed when I learned I made President's List; my universities idea of the Dean's List.

I'm glad the Seroquel is working well for you; I would personally be lost without my Seroquel. My spring semester starts on the 22nd as well; I've been enjoying my break.

The weather here is supposed to drop as well so I am in fleece pajamas; fuzzy socks, and my cat is enjoying my blanket and keeping my feet extra toasty.

[TheSeaCat]

Originally Posted by Aurelius710

Job hunting today before the big snowstorm shows up.

I've been going to college and taking the student loan dump as I was thrown out of my job in a rather contentious way, but I had a grand total of 8 classes (now 4) left till I graduate). So, nice middle finger the @#$holes who fired me as I finish my schooling.

Well, my university has decided to delay disbursing that money courtesy of bureaucratic loophole that they didn't bother to implement until a day before they left for Christmas and confirmed now, three days before classes.

I can't seem to go a month without something blowing up in my face. Here's hoping the job interviews are not like that.

Good luck with the job hunting; I also know what it was like to be fired while I was also getting my Bachelor's it really sucks; lucky for me it happened in the summer and I was not taking summer classes; so I totally know where you are coming from.

[~Christina]

Originally Posted by Innerzone

Found something definitely interesting while looking for a job yesterday. It's not a paid thing, but I really want to do it. They promptly emailed me back, so that was exciting. Hoping to hear more back today (and maybe interview??).


Spent for.e.ver filling out an online app for something else (paid ), and it won't let me submit it due to a bug in their system. Very frustrating. This is why I hate hate hate online applications. So I'm going to have to go there in person today and see if I can make any headway.


So yesterday just felt much more encouraging job-hunt-wise. It's usually very, very bleak for me. (To have one maybe thing is a very big deal. I'm a good worker, but possess no in-demand skills.)


Insurance-wise is a mixed bag. Yes, my psych provider (who was surprisingly in network)*does* work somewhere else too which I was able to track down yesterday. My foot is still injured and I really should have it looked at. BUT. Soon I will be either forced onto the (****) work insurance (huge deductible), or have a new job with who-knows-what. So everything will be tossed in the air again. I'm really mad at myself for not having put off taking care of my arm for so long, because now it will just be who knows how long till I can. What an idiot.


So, another busy day ahead. Trying to get as much done as possible, since starting next week, I'll have virtually no time to do anything (too much work and long commute times).


Consciously working on keeping a good attitude, as it's been a struggle. (Looking for a job is no time to tank!)

IZ !!!!!!!

I’m going to start calling you a wolverine !! ( red dawn reference)

You never stop pushing yourself!! Brave and seemingly fearless

But make sure to take care of yourself.

[Sunflower123]

I went to have a spa treatment today and the technician nervously asked me if she could tell me something. I said sure. Apparently people getting that service are tense and unhappy and she gets nervous and uptight. She said you are so happy and cheery and easygoing that I wanted to say thank you...you made my day. I in turn said thank you...you made my day because I was crying all the way over here about my mom. We’ll just have a giggle fest.

I’ve raised my daughter that she may be the last person somebody encounters in their life while they are making difficult decisions and fighting tough battles. Kindness costs nothing and can have a huge impact with untold ripple effects.

Just saying....

Warm wishes and hugs to all

[Guiness187055]

What a **** day. I missed a phone call from Social security. She said I have to call back or I forfeit my case. She called at 2pm today and when I went to call back no one was there. Hopefully I can still call on Monday or she will hear from my attorney. I can't imagine they would only give me three hours notice. Nevertheless I am still freaking out I may have to take an extra xanax. Hope everyone had a better day than me.

[Sunflower123]

Originally Posted by Guiness187055

What a **** day. I missed a phone call from Social security. She said I have to call back or I forfeit my case. She called at 2pm today and when I went to call back no one was there. Hopefully I can still call on Monday or she will hear from my attorney. I can't imagine they would only give me three hours notice. Nevertheless I am still freaking out I may have to take an extra xanax. Hope everyone had a better day than me.

I’m sorry that happened to you. That’s nerve wracking! I hope everything gets straightened out smoothly for you.

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by Guiness187055

What a **** day. I missed a phone call from Social security. She said I have to call back or I forfeit my case. She called at 2pm today and when I went to call back no one was there. Hopefully I can still call on Monday or she will hear from my attorney. I can't imagine they would only give me three hours notice. Nevertheless I am still freaking out I may have to take an extra xanax. Hope everyone had a better day than me.

That is such a stressful process to go through!
I would think it only reasonable to allow you a few days to call back. That seems like a threat; I think they probably have applicants who do not call back.

I hope you can find some peace about this over the weekend!

WC

[~Christina]

Honestly didn’t do anything today I don’t know if it’s okay or not.

Last night I read a new book on my kindle and just downloaded the second in the series to read tonight.

I can read a book a day.

I love free books by Indie authors. If First books are good then I’ll pay for the next , most are 2-4 bucks.

Maybe tomorrow I’ll get back to my daily house cleaning, felt odd today not running the vac or scrubbing something.

Happy Friday everyone !

[Wander]

F*** my brain is driving me crazy. Or maybe the crazy is driving my brain? Running so fast, tangental or obsessed, or, playing my own personal radio station that I cannot turn off or down. Often I am still fixated on my diagnosis. I analyse every moment of my past for clues and only become more confused. I lie to my family and treatment team when unwell. Mostly to avoid worrying them, but also to avoid being stopped and trapped in hospital. I can believe my delusions and sill be able to pretend I am not having them. Does that make me not psychotic and a liar? Am I faking my entire illness? Am I lying now? Is anything I think real even? I cannot tell the difference.

[cashart10]

@~Christina,

I have been meaning to say this for quite some time but didn’t know the time or platform to do it. If this is not allowed or is upsetting to you, please delete it. I just want to say I’m sorry for being ****** to you way back when. I was in a bad state of mind and I felt personally attacked, not even by you, but I took it out on you. And, that is no excuse, I am certain, but I am genuinely sorry.

Thank you,
Sarah

[tecomsin]

Originally Posted by Wander

F*** my brain is driving me crazy. Or maybe the crazy is driving my brain? Running so fast, tangental or obsessed, or, playing my own personal radio station that I cannot turn off or down. Often I am still fixated on my diagnosis. I analyse every moment of my past for clues and only become more confused. I lie to my family and treatment team when unwell. Mostly to avoid worrying them, but also to avoid being stopped and trapped in hospital. I can believe my delusions and sill be able to pretend I am not having them. Does that make me not psychotic and a liar? Am I faking my entire illness? Am I lying now? Is anything I think real even? I cannot tell the difference.

I also lie and cover up when I am having delusions. I think this is fairly common because people don't want to give up their freedom. I think a bigger problem is covering up my symptoms to my psychiatrist. Do you have a go to medication when you start to have delusions?

[tecomsin]

Since I take Rexulti every day, my pdoc said I could play around with my Olanzapine dosage and didn't have to take it if my sleep was ok. So last night I tried skipping that 2.5 mg of Olanzapine to see if I would sleep ok, and I did. I definitely feel less drugged when I'm not on it and my tremor is significantly better today too. Taking Olanzapine long term affects my blood sugar and other levels so I try to avoid it unless I need it for sleeping.

[wildflowerchild25]

Originally Posted by Wander

F*** my brain is driving me crazy. Or maybe the crazy is driving my brain? Running so fast, tangental or obsessed, or, playing my own personal radio station that I cannot turn off or down. Often I am still fixated on my diagnosis. I analyse every moment of my past for clues and only become more confused. I lie to my family and treatment team when unwell. Mostly to avoid worrying them, but also to avoid being stopped and trapped in hospital. I can believe my delusions and sill be able to pretend I am not having them. Does that make me not psychotic and a liar? Am I faking my entire illness? Am I lying now? Is anything I think real even? I cannot tell the difference.

Harry: is this real? Or is it just happening inside my head?
Dumbledore: of course it’s happening inside your head, Harry. By why on earth should that mean that it is not real?

[wildflowerchild25]

I feel significantly better today. I think I’m turning a corner. RS spent the night and we had a great relaxing night watching a movie and tv. Today we had breakfast at ihop and then went to an aquarium and arcade down by the shore with my son. The shore was so relaxing. Not too many people because it’s the middle of winter. It was cold but the sun was shining so it didn’t feel too chilly wrapped up in my jacket and scarf. We came home and RS helped my son build more of his LEGO titanic that he got for Christmas. Then he helped me do the cleaning I’ve been neglecting because I’ve been feeling so depressed. I feel much better with everything being cleaned up. Later my SIL and BIL are gonna come and have a few drinks. I’m not going to drink though.

So maybe the extra haldol is helping? Or maybe it’s just because I’m spending so much time with RS? I don’t know. We will see tomorrow when RS goes home for a couple of days. But I hope I’m just feeling better in general.

[Wild Coyote]

Yesterday: Saw pdoc. She'd doubled my Wellbutrin. I really like her. She is a new pdoc for me.

Today: My niece came for lunch and stayed 3 hours. We always have a great time! It was very uplifting, even though she was asking a lot of questions about family tragedies which had occurred before her time. It was a little triggering, which I feel more since she has left.

Still struggling with depression and with feeling like life is not worth all of the effort.

I had struggled to get dressed and with getting lunch ready for my niece even though I LOVE seeing her.

It's cold. Windchill today -10 F. It has been sunny, which is a plus!

Love to All!

WC

[Wild Coyote]

Originally Posted by wildflowerchild25

I feel significantly better today. I think I’m turning a corner. RS spent the night and we had a great relaxing night watching a movie and tv. Today we had breakfast at ihop and then went to an aquarium and arcade down by the shore with my son. The shore was so relaxing. Not too many people because it’s the middle of winter. It was cold but the sun was shining so it didn’t feel too chilly wrapped up in my jacket and scarf. We came home and RS helped my son build more of his LEGO titanic that he got for Christmas. Then he helped me do the cleaning I’ve been neglecting because I’ve been feeling so depressed. I feel much better with everything being cleaned up. Later my SIL and BIL are gonna come and have a few drinks. I’m not going to drink though.

So maybe the extra haldol is helping? Or maybe it’s just because I’m spending so much time with RS? I don’t know. We will see tomorrow when RS goes home for a couple of days. But I hope I’m just feeling better in general.

I am glad to read you are having a better day!

Sounds like RS is a gem! You deserve the best!

Enjoy!

WC