Bipolar Check-In #38

I have gotten through many months with rice and beans.. I like it in general but when it’s a staple for a week or 2 I get bored but hey! It’s cheap and filling.

I keeps about 20 cans of various beans on hand, so I can at least mix it up a bit lol

Yikes I am glad you didn't get hit this time! Sorry that happened to you in the past. I felt pretty invincible in all my adventures as a kid as well, but after having some health problems developed a lot more anxiety about getting hurt. I guess I just have to get out there and do it until I get more comfortable. Happy riding!

I have rice. And canned soup! I have some of that. We have ooodlesof noodles. We have spaghetti sauce and alfredo. Now Im hungry. Lol

This has been my go-to as well in the past when my budget is tight. Takes more work to soak them, but sometimes I would even get the dried beans (I think it's a little cheaper that way). Usually I just got cans, though. Sometimes I'll add in cheap corn tortillas. Lentils/chickpeas are another way I switch it up. I like making chickpea salad.

It was a storage day today. I was feeling withdrawn in the morning but I had to go to work. So I pushed myself to go and got busy as soon as I arrived.

Things just kept going and I was busy throughout the day but the feeling of being withdrawn persisted. I had meetings, phone calls, emails, and worked on some hard problems.

When I got home I just went on the computer and stayed there until it was time for bed. I didn't say a thing to my wife except for Hello when I walked in.

I guess I was craving the thought of being alone and finally got my chance in the evening in front of the computer.

I don't like days like this because I just force my way through whatever I'm feeling and it takes a lot of mental energy to do that. And in the end I don't feel better at all.

I hope this week is better for everyone.

Mate, I hope this evening allows you to settle out of the stress and tension. A'best.

Just had some ham and milk for a late dinner. I was already in bed but I can't sleep when I'm hungry. Now I feel better.

Yes!!! I do love some beans dried. Soaking is kind of annoying but they do taste better than canned.

I love chickpea salad and I roast them for snacks

I hope tomorrow is a much better day for you

My appointment with my therapist went well. Got the letter I needed for my college so I can start classes again hopefully in the Spring.

Had a horrible panic attack but was able to get through it

I have plans to have dinner and go to a movie with a friend of mine Friday, looking forward to it!

It's 2am right now, woke up at 1 and can't get back to sleep. Maybe I'll draw

Plan on trying out intermittent fasting to see if I can lose some weight

I started my small group for church tonight. It wasn't much like I expected; it was mostly just chit chat. I thought when they said we'd be doing this study that we'd be reading the book so I bought the book and read the first chapter (twice to be ready) and instead they have videos to show each week with discussion questions. I think we got off track on the discussion rapidly. It was fine and fun and I enjoyed it (except when they discussed someone I absolutely don't know). I took my meds a little late but fell asleep about my normal time. Then I proceeded to wake up at 12:50 and now it's 2 AM and I'm not even sleepy. I think I got overstimulated. I don't spend much time chatting with 5 strangers in my normal life. I know that it will feel more normal soon.

I need to sleep. I have the dentist and don't want to be soaking wet from the shower when I go; I need to be up before time to leave. Soon I'll just take a shower but it's late and I don't want to be further stimulated.

Hope everyone else is asleep. Hi Blue Bird!

4:30 here and can't sleep... Having a really rough night.

Doing absolutely horrible with visual vivid hallucinations....

I was in the hospital twice for a spell last month. Physically ill.

The hospital doctors, my PCP, and pdoc said I have an autoimmune disease...probably Multiple Sclerosis, Lupus, or Mixed Connective Tissue disease.

I’m using a walker at home. I’m falling down, severe weakness and fatigue. Horrible rash that worsens daily. Insomnia. A lot of pain. I feel and look like my body is attacking itself.

I am scared and still very sick and so anxious.. I am having a mixed episode with fully blown psychosis....very high stress from this and what my future holds triggered the mixed episode.

Someone tell me I’m not $&#@&#. Medicare fortunately let me enroll in a good PPO early (had a crappy HMO) and there is a treatment team near me and I’ve been accepted as a patient starting Nov 1st. PCP, Rheumatologist, Neurogist, Dermatologist, Podiatrist. Physical therapy. Fortunately all in the same medical group.

This is RainyDay btw. Having an account issue so I messaged admin for help.

Sending positive vibes to those that need it. I am only going to read on PC for now. But I will be thinking of you. This forum is my “home.”

RainyDay

Beyond the rainbow I'm glad you had fun tonight . I'm sorry you can't sleep. I didn't get much sleep either.

Child of Chaos I hope you have a better day today. That you're able to sleep a little bit more.

Hi Moose. My parents charged me room and board exactly as Christina described. My husband's parents did the same with him. It's a very good thing, I believe. Even if he doesn't like it now, I bet he'll feel the same way as me when he has an adult child living with him.

Hey, first time posting in this forum, I usually post in the psychosis forum but I decided to go ahead and post here as well, I hope that's okay.

I can't sleep tonight, a bit worried it'll send me on a manic spree. But part of me is kinda hoping for that because I've been so depressed and without energy lately.

Hi falcon, do you have any prns to take tomorrow if you still not sleeping?

I could take an extra Valium, but besides that, no.

My psychiatrist called me back last night. He almost always does within a few hours. I took the higher dose of Seroquel XR. It's odd, I actually slept a little less last night and woke up feeling more capable of getting started. I hope I get back on track quickly.

I have my volunteering this morning. I'm not looking forward to it, but I will go. It's not dread, though. I think that once I get my butt there it won't be so bad. I just hate the drive. I desperately need a shower, but have been resisting lately. I will make myself, as hard as it will be. Update: Showered + self-care done.

Hubby is appearing in court today. We were short-changed some money we deserved, so he's fighting for it. Hopefully it will be resolved in our favor today. We have also been receiving obnoxious emails from this towing agency that overcharged us when our car broke down in NY a few months ago. Our credit card company supported us on it, but the towing agency owner is a greedy you know what. I just wish cheats would leave us alone already. We have enough worries. One good thing is that hubby will get his tooth pulled without the need of a waste of time "consultation". The sad part is that it's not until next Tuesday. Imagine having to wait almost 2 weeks to get an infected painful cracked tooth pulled?

My husband has a friend that is likely as stressed (or maybe more) than we are. She pretty much begged my husband for us to visit her soon. Her cat ran away and her 95 year old mother is dying. I really don't feel up to such a visit, but we will go because she does absolutely need the support. If by chance anyone recalls, she is the friend of my hubby that I ran into at the grocery store a few months back, after cancelling a dinner date with her (I was unwell). There she told me she had talked to her therapist about the pain of people cancelling on her.

Tomorrow is another dreaded trip to Philadelphia for my husband's eye appointment. Again, Philly itself is fine, but the appointments are hell.

I saw pdoc this morning. Someone else sat in on my appointment because my case manager is out sick. Pdoc said I always seem to have it together - I assured her I am NOT always ok! she asked several questions about my sleep and energy and feelings in general and then decided I'm depressed and prescribed more Rexulti. Just a half mg more but she said it should "brighten" me. We also discussed my being brought up in an alcoholic family- so the lady who was sitting in printed me resources for Alanon and food banks. As if THAT makes me more cheery! I came home and ate canned soup. A stash I keep "just in case"- well now is "just in case". I ate the whole can at once. Probably not the serving size but oh well. I'm waiting for N3 to get home. He went on a walk. I rescheduled my appointment that was supposed to be tomorrow morning because I accidentally took my blood thinner yesterday. Now its not till December. But that's ok- I figured they wouldn't have a spot until February so this is better.

I hope the increase in rexulti helps. Obviously everyone is different, but I know an increase in mine made a huge difference with depression even with only 0.5mg more.

I did some cleaning up. Tore up 3 large boxes into small pieces so that I could fit them into my recycling bin bag. Then I put some stuff away in a clear bin on one of my closet’s shelves.

Otherwise, my day was pretty boring, all in all. Did nothing much besides clean and watch YouTube. I feel pathetic for being so lazy, but I'm sure tomorrow will be more productive.

Hey Blue!

Some days are just less productive, or productive in different ways!
It sounds like you have been doing a great job getting things in shape.

When you are finished, you can come to my house and help me to get more organized!

Is your computer fixed?

It's great you are giving the group a try. I find myself overly stimulated if I stay near much activity (at all) in the evening. I do best by winding down early.

I hope all went well with the dentist?
How is Charlie?
Much Love

YES! I have also spent a year or more eating rice and beans. I learned to love it and I learned a lot about specific rices and beans. Got great prices in bulk at a local health food store. I, too, used a lot of chickpeas (humus) and lentils! Lentils! I turned into a lentil freak! I even ate lentils or lentil soup for breakfast.

I was very healthy, very fit.
It can be a very healthy way of living, as long as one's diet is balanced overall.

Love to All!