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#276
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Happy Easter! ("Veselé Velikonoce!" in Czech) to all who celebrate this holiday. To those who don't, Happy Spring! Hubby and I will spend the holiday alone, because of the pandemic, but I will make a special dinner, including pork loin with green peppercorn Cognac cream sauce, roasted herbed potatoes, and steamed green beans. We have a couple dessert options, both including caramel and nuts. Yesterday I made a zucchini leek quiche from scratch, along with an apple nut raisin hand pie, with the leftover crust dough. Both were good. We had expected some snow and ice today, but that seems to have disappeared from the forecast.
Last night I was super anxious feeling like my heart was racing. Plus, having difficulty breathing because of sinus/nasal congestion. I took an Ativan again, and do believe it helped me sleep, despite the anxiety. I woke up a bit anxious, but managed to use healthy coping skills instead of an extra benzo. It's interesting how so many people in Czech Republic decorate for Easter. Not only are there lots of colored hard boiled eggs, but egg ornaments hanging from trees/bushes, spring decor on doors, and often a displayed decorated whip made out of thin branches. Some may find this far from PC, but the old tradition would be that young men interested in a girl would go around on Easter with this whip. It would all be in good fun, though. A traditional bread called "mazanec" would also be consumed. I didn't make a mazanec this year, but have several times in the past. We did eat some this year, but store bought. Attached are photos of my quiche and a mazanec I made last year. Last edited by Soupe du jour; Apr 04, 2021 at 03:44 AM. |
![]() *Beth*, Anonymous41462, Anonymous45023, buddha1too, Nammu, Sunflower123
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![]() *Beth*, buddha1too, Nammu, Sunflower123
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#277
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Clumsiness is actually an on-going issue for me. I'm not sure my going off Klonopin is a main culprit, but I have felt light-headed, which could cause accidents. I hope you both stay safe. None of us need to fall or hurt ourselves. |
![]() *Beth*, Anonymous41462, Sunflower123
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![]() *Beth*, Sunflower123
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#278
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![]() Sunflower123
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#279
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Haven't checked in for a little while. Mostly all good here. Gave up my 1-1.5 pack a day smoking habit about 13 days ago. It's been a bit hard but nicotine patches and Wellbutrin seem to be helping me. Today will be tough, as I will be around family members who smoke. But whatever happens I WILL NOT EVER buy a pack.
Happy Easter, everyone! Sent from my SM-G950U using Tapatalk |
![]() *Beth*, Anonymous45023, buddha1too, gina_re, Nammu, Soupe du jour, Sunflower123
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![]() *Beth*, buddha1too, gina_re, Nammu, Soupe du jour, Sunflower123
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#280
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***Congratulations!***
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![]() scatterbrained04
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#281
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accept for the absolute agony in my back, my easter is okay so far
weather's nice, (better than they said it would be), good breakfast, had some eggs and did an online easter quiz (and was surprised at how much I knew about the easter story) having lamb later |
![]() *Beth*, buddha1too, Nammu, Soupe du jour, Sunflower123
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#282
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I was awoken by 2 knocks again last night. This time definitely the wall that joins my bedroom to another apartment. I looked up and saw that I wasn't wearing my cpap- it was hanging on the bed post. So I put it on. Maybe they can hear my snoring through the wall? I heard no snoring at all.
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Qui Cantat Bis Orat ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 3 mg Gabapentin 300 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily Mania Sept/Oct 2024 Mania (July/August 2024) Mania (December 2023) Mixed episode/Hypomania (September 2023) Depression, Anxiety and Intrusive thoughts (September 2021) Depression & Psychosis (July/August 2021) |
![]() *Beth*, buddha1too, Nammu, Soupe du jour, Sunflower123
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#283
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This will make you laugh TikTok
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Qui Cantat Bis Orat ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 3 mg Gabapentin 300 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily Mania Sept/Oct 2024 Mania (July/August 2024) Mania (December 2023) Mixed episode/Hypomania (September 2023) Depression, Anxiety and Intrusive thoughts (September 2021) Depression & Psychosis (July/August 2021) Last edited by Moose72; Apr 04, 2021 at 10:59 AM. |
![]() *Beth*, buddha1too, Sunflower123
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#284
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I’m not sure what was up with yesterday and all that anxiety. I feel totally fine today. I slept a lot last night and I woke up this morning later then usual and then I went back to sleep. It’s a beautiful Easter Day. I’m not doing anything for Easter. I’m just staying home. My mom is going to my aunts but I am not totally comfortable around my cousin and his wife. I think his wife is not totally ok with the trans thing and it makes me sad because I really like his wife.
But anyways today I’m feeling fine. I haven’t had any Xanax yet and I’m not missing my therapist. Yesterday I was crazy missing her and I had no idea why since I had been doing so well. My new favorite song is Wrecking Ball by Miley Cyrus. I hope I don’t play the hell out of that song the way I played Million Dollar Loan by Death Cab For Cutie.
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"Good morning starshine.... the earth says hello"- Willy Wonka Last edited by Mountaindewed; Apr 04, 2021 at 11:38 AM. |
![]() *Beth*, Sunflower123
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#285
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@scatterbrained04...Congratulations on 13 days without a cigarette! That's huge! Since smoking is something one does pretty much throughout the day, often without giving it any thought, it's an especially tough habit to break. You'll soon be reaping the health & financial benefits of your efforts. I hope your Easter gathering doesn't tempt you too much.
@Soupe du jour...I bet your cooking tastes divine, but the pictures you posted are like works of art! I might hesitate to dig in since your kitchen efforts are so visually pleasing. I'm glad you take such pleasure from cooking & baking. Your husband must realize he's very lucky to belly up to your table! @Moose72...Isn't this the second time you've heard knocking in the middle of the night? That must be very unsettling. I hope you can get to the bottom of this soon. Have a good day, everyone. |
![]() *Beth*, Anonymous41462, Soupe du jour
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![]() *Beth*, Soupe du jour
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#286
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@Moose72...Isn't this the second time you've heard knocking in the middle of the night? That must be very unsettling. I hope you can get to the bottom of this soon.
Yes! Within the same week too!
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Qui Cantat Bis Orat ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 3 mg Gabapentin 300 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily Mania Sept/Oct 2024 Mania (July/August 2024) Mania (December 2023) Mixed episode/Hypomania (September 2023) Depression, Anxiety and Intrusive thoughts (September 2021) Depression & Psychosis (July/August 2021) |
#287
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Having a wee bit of trouble lately with sleep issues, increased anxiety with bouts of racing heart, bouts of mild light-headedness, fear of heart issues/dying, fear of kidney failure/dying, high/normal/low energy and motivation fluctuations, difficulty concentrating at times, and a little hypergraphia. Occasional blurry vision. My medication controlled blood pressure has been a bit low, but I doubt low enough to cause any of the above. Right now it's 1:45 am where I am. I do have a sleepiness, but don't want to sleep. I feel like time will fly by too fast. It's like magnetic resistance, spoon of cod liver oil, standing on a diving board that's way too high.
I'm hungry. I'm antsy. I want something, but don't know what it is. I wish I could jump through the paper of a painted theater stage screen. I fear my two front teeth will soon need to be taken out. Hey You, out there! Hey! Yea, You! You! Hear me? Hear Me! I'm here and I want to break free! Fly high. Dump extra baggage to lighten the load. Yes, that's it! Yea, You! Not, You! Me! Me equals You. You is Me. You and Me does not equal We. Understand Me, Wendy? Last edited by Soupe du jour; Apr 04, 2021 at 07:16 PM. |
![]() *Beth*, Anonymous41462, Anonymous45023, bizi, buddha1too, Moose72, Nammu, Sunflower123, Victoria'smom
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![]() bizi, Moose72
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#288
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@Soupe du jour: Your post does not make a lot of sense. Is it because of the late night there?
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![]() *Beth*, buddha1too, Sunflower123
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#289
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@scatterbrained04: Congratulations on quitting smoking! That is a huge accomplishment. I'm glad you are taking advantage of the smoking cessation aids. I know you are new in your recovery but you have made a great start and hopefully the worst is behind you. Good luck in resisting triggers from your family members who are still shackled.
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![]() *Beth*, buddha1too
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#290
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Hi there Soupe! Are you feeling manic?
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![]() bizi
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![]() bizi, buddha1too, Sunflower123
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#291
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![]() *Beth*, Anonymous45023
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#292
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![]() buddha1too
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#293
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I got my brother to agree to be vaccinated. With COPD, 3 bypasses, diabetes and at serious risk of losing a foot (all at 58) he needs it badly. I just found one appointment left out of 3,000 luckily and told him we were going. He didn’t fight me on it surprisingly. I’ll be much relieved when we get through the process and he has some protection. It happens to be at the same time as my dermatologist appointment for blemishes caused by my mask but there’s no doubt which one I choose. Is anyone else having that problem?
I had a lovely Easter. I watched movies, sat in the sunshine drinking a passionfruit mango drink, and read part of a really good book. My sister and BIL brought over plates of delicious food and I just totally relaxed. It’s back to the drawing board for me tomorrow with my responsibilities, PT for my back, telehealth with my NP and a Zoom meeting. Today was good. I needed that. I hope everybody else had a good Easter as well. |
![]() *Beth*, Anonymous41462, Anonymous45023, BeyondtheRainbow, buddha1too, Nammu, Soupe du jour
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![]() *Beth*
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#294
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Yes, this! Soupe are you okay? You sound a bit ramped up.
__________________
Qui Cantat Bis Orat ingrezza 80 mg Propranolol 40 mg Benztropine 1 mg Vraylar 3 mg Gabapentin 300 mg Klonopin 1 mg 2x daily Mania Sept/Oct 2024 Mania (July/August 2024) Mania (December 2023) Mixed episode/Hypomania (September 2023) Depression, Anxiety and Intrusive thoughts (September 2021) Depression & Psychosis (July/August 2021) |
![]() buddha1too
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#295
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@Soupe du jour...I'm with the rest of the gang in expressing concern. As I recall, your Czech pdoc said you can call him whenever you need some help/reassurance; that would provide some immediate help. Then, you've got your American pdoc & therapist on-deck. I know it's difficult to reach out, but sleep disruptions such as those you've been experiencing are a sign I'm potentially headed into spaces I don't care to dwell in. Your body is trying to tell you something. Listen.
Also, if you haven't done so already, it might help to wake your husband so he can help you through the night. I don't care if he's got to work in the morning...he's your husband, & I'm sure he'd be more than happy to guide you through this event. Then, there's the rest of us...your "crazy comrades." Please write us in the morning to let us know how you're doing, & what you're going to do to address this. Given the resources I've just listed, I hope you know there are a lot of people pulling for you. Hang in there. |
![]() *Beth*, Nammu, Sunflower123
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#296
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It was a dull day except for watching "Parks and Recreation." I decided to treat myself to a favorite meal but they screwed up and it never arrived so i got credits. I ended up having chips and Nutella and alcohol-free wine. I had some milk later so it wasn't a total write-off.
I'm sore from my fall in the shower yesterday so i just got my dog out to the dog-run where she has a good time chasing the squirrels. I enjoyed the fresh air. I was so bored tonight i played Scrabble for the first time in five weeks. It was dull. There were no ZOOM events today and none tomorrow. I miss them. Hugs to all! ![]() |
![]() *Beth*, Anonymous45023, buddha1too, Nammu, Sunflower123
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#297
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That sounds like a pretty bad day, whenever. Tomorrow begins a new week, though...& it's not a holiday. You've got those things going for you, anyways. I know you're under quarantine again, but I hope you can find something to fill your week. If walking is difficult due to your fall, will the trains still be running? Taking a ride & just watching the world go bye might take your mind off things. Don't let the walls close in on you too much. Hang in there.
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![]() Anonymous41462
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#298
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you are bp1 right. this post makes me very very concerned for you. You need help now. What does hubby say? bizi
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lamictal 2x a day haldol 2x a day cogentin 2x a day klonipin , 1mg at night, fish oil coq10 multi vit,, vit c, at noon, tumeric, caffeine Remeron at night, zyprexa, requip2-4mg |
![]() buddha1too, Sunflower123
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#299
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Thanks for the caring encouragement and concern, dear friends! I only managed perhaps one hour of sleep last night. I couldn't and didn't even want to sleep, which for me is a dangerous sign. I guess a "mixish" spring upswing is starting. It is almost a given, each year, but was mostly absent last spring. I confess that feeling super grounded, for a long time, can make one feel too confident that that won't change, but the illness lives in hiding, sort of like a brain herpes. [Sorry for this example, but it sort of fits
![]() Hubby is aware of my situation. It will be attacked, as needed. I suppose a touch of Seroquel iR prn is in order. Signs are now showing with my figurative headlights turned on. I'm so ready to be free, yet the gates are still closed in many directions. I won't allow myself to jump over them, though. You know, I did take my evening meds last night. It was as if I didn't. It's amazing how delicate the reins of sanity can be! Like they're twine vs. rope, or the even stronger metal chains. |
![]() *Beth*, Anonymous45023, bizi, buddha1too, Nammu, Sunflower123, wildflowerchild25
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![]() *Beth*, bizi, Nammu, Sunflower123
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#300
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Easter/my birthday was aggravating af. I’m not sure if it was my negative attitude going in that ended up being a self fulfilling prophecy but overall it was a typical family mess and hopefully the last one because I think my grandmother is totally over it. I think she was hoping for better but it was the same as always with disrespect, displays of passive aggression, and an undercurrent of well-ingrained anger between individuals in a spiderweb of connections.
But it’s ok, I’m on spring break now so I’m able to get a lot of things done around the house. Going to switch my clothes from winter to summer and clean up the dressing room that is still not really unpacked. I got a home goods gift card so I’m headed there today, along with Trader Joe’s. I do like to check out their seasonal offerings every few months. I do have to get home by 2:45 so I can take my cat to the vet. Need to renew his prescription for his special food, get his shots, and get his runny eye checked out. My other cat is going next week for her shots and I’m going to mention her coughing and wheezing as well. She got extremely sick with pneumonia as a kitten and has had an occasional cough with wheezing ever since, but it seems to be getting more frequent. I seem to be bypassing my usual hormonal depression this month so that’s good, usually I’m laid out for three days in deep despair. I think I’ve calmed down from the slight elevation of mood and energy kicked off in early March. I’ve adjusted to the warmer temperatures and lengthened sunlight. I did buy new clothes but I have lost 30lbs since last year so it was a necessity. I won’t need to buy any more until fall, when I’ve hopefully lost more weight and will need to replace some of my work wardrobe. I’ve finally gotten past the stall I was in for the whole of winter.
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Of course it is happening inside your head. But why on earth should that mean that it is not real? -Albus Dumbledore That’s life. If nothing else, that is life. It’s real. Sometimes it f—-ing hurts. But it’s sort of all we have. -Garden State |
![]() *Beth*, Anonymous45023, buddha1too, gina_re, Nammu, Sunflower123
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![]() *Beth*, gina_re
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Closed Thread |
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