Bipolar Check-in #81

bizi · Aug 17, 2024, 04:31 PM

I can't remember dreams maybe it is the klonipin?or the haldol or the lamictil or the cogentin or etc.....
bizi

LadyShadow · Aug 17, 2024, 06:54 PM

Me and my boyfriend broke up. It's been EXTREMELY hard. This is the second heartbreak I have suffered in a year. It has put a real strain on my sobriety, all I wanted to do was get completely smashed this afternoon in a bar, but I ended up driving to a meeting instead. I was very quiet and my head down, so after the meeting two ladies I know followed me to my car to make sure I was okay - I love them more than you know.

What I decided to do was go get a pedicure. I literally haven't had one since LAST MAY, ugh. Not only did I get a pedicure, but I got the "Heavenly Feet" spa one for $75 - I sat there for two and a half hours in the massage chair, with tears rolling down my eyes, thanking God for his Grace and this wonderful life that I have. I WILL NOT LET A MAN take away all I have worked so hard for; my sobriety means everything to me.

BeyondtheRainbow · Aug 17, 2024, 07:03 PM

@LadyShadow I'm so sorry about your break-up. I know it hurts. I'm so glad you were able to take care of yourself in a safe way today.

BeyondtheRainbow · Aug 17, 2024, 07:06 PM

Welcome back @Sunflower456 I'm sorry you've been through so much with your health. I'm glad it is improving and that you have something to look forward to. I'm so glad you were able to go to your daughter's wedding. I know that was a point of stress for a while.

bizi · Aug 17, 2024, 07:29 PM

congratulations lady shadow.I am sorry that you are hurting but you used great coping skills, very proud of you.

Nammu · Aug 17, 2024, 07:57 PM

Oh, shadow, I’m sorry. However kudus on useing your strengths to go to a meeting and then pamper yourself. Those spa foot treatments are indeed heavenly.

JaneOnceMore · Aug 17, 2024, 09:43 PM

@LadyShadow:

So sorry to hear about your break-up but a hearty bravo on coping with it in a healthy way. Sobriety is an excellent value. Alcohol abuse causes so much suffering in our society. Really, congratulations!

@Sunflower456:

Welcome back! Sorry to hear you have been struggling with your physical health. Glad you enjoyed your daughter's wedding, i remember your attendance was iffy at one point.

@Nammu:

I get bored and restless too. Today i started watching "LOST" on Netflix. It's something to do, but not a real powerhouse show like "Ozark."

@June08:

So sorry about the loss of your friend's mom.

Moose72 · 10:36 PM

A couple days ago I ate lunch with Robert at a Vietnamese restaurant near home. I ordered a spicy noodle dish but didn't specify how spicy. I happily ate the veggies and noodles in a brown sauce and my tongue burned and tingled the whole time.

Today I went back and ordered avocado cream cheese egg rolls with dipping sauce and those were good. No tongue tingling/burning. I asked the waiter if the dipping sauce had fish sauce in it because I'm allergic to seafood. He said it did not but the main dish I ordered has clam sauce! The same dish the previous few days before wasn't “spicy”. I was having an allergic reaction! I'm lucky my tongue didn't swell any more than it did or I probably would've had to call 911!

HALLIEBETH87 · Aug 17, 2024, 10:26 PM

My liver enzymes are high and I have to get a liver ultrasound next week. Ugh

Moose72 · Aug 17, 2024, 10:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by HALLIEBETH87

My liver enzymes are high and I have to get a liver ultrasound next week. Ugh

You might have fatty liver.

June08 · Aug 17, 2024, 11:19 PM

@LadyShadow I'm so sorry about your breakup. Nice job using strategies in your toolbox to take care of yourself.

Today has been a good day. I gave myself an extra couple of hours in bed which helped my mental health and energy levels to make it a pretty good day.

BeyondtheRainbow · Aug 18, 2024, 12:17 AM

It suddenly hit me a couple hours ago that this week I have to meet my temporary therapist. And that makes my real therapist being gone feel very real. I don't want to do the temporary thing but I don't think I'd do well with 6 weeks of nothing. Her bio on the website sounds nice enough. It doesn't say she has a lot of experience with bipolar. I'm sure she'll be fine, I just miss my real therapist already and this will drive home that I won't see him for 6 weeks. I missed last week but that felt natural since I was supposed to be on vacation. Normally though I'd be on vacation and then the next week see real therapist, not some stranger.

It will be fine. It's only a few sessions. Even if I hate her I can cancel the rest and white knuckle it. But I'm still do anxious I need a PRN to sleep. Until tonight I've been falling asleep early. this week.

Just 6 weeks......

Manarinorange · Aug 18, 2024, 01:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sunflower456

Hello all! I posted here for years but slowly became inactive. It’s good to be back.

I attended my daughter’s wedding in April. She was so beautiful. It was a lovely time.

I started getting sick about 2 years ago and my PCP kept saying everything was okay. I finally collapsed and went to the ER by ambulance. It was severe anemia with an internal bleed. It’s been a long recuperation process with bi- weekly iron infusions. I finally see the light at the end of the tunnel.

I’m on Ozempic now and have lost 47 pounds. It’s not a magic pill but it helps. I eat well 98% of the time and exercise on a mini- trampoline, do yoga, Qigong and weights.

I got together with a group of women over 40 who travel together and I’m going to a luxury resort in Panama in May. That motivates me more to get better from my anemia.

Been too sick for my beloved pool this summer.

I hope everyone is well. Hugs to all that need them.

I'm so sorry about the anemia! 🤗 hopefully soon you will be to great health.

So glad you have such a fantastic vacation coming up that can motivate you! So glad for you.

Manarinorange · Aug 18, 2024, 01:59 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blueberrybook

Sorry there are too many posts for me to reply to, but I've read them all. ((((HUGS)))) to everyone struggling.

I woke up tired this morning, but now I feel amped and up. I did have a cup of regular coffee, but that was at 8 AM and it's nearly 11:30 AM now, and usually the caffeine jolt from coffee has worn off by now.

I'm still stable if not a bit amped this morning. I took a walk/jog and went to the grocery store for a few items and I controlled myself and stuck to my mental list of items I needed and did not overspend! And I forgot to write my list down, so it was in my head and I remembered everything, which I had less than 10 items, but still there was a time I couldn't remember a mental list of only 3 items to buy. And it is Saturday so the store was passing out samples: I got to sample chicken mole, a corn salad, banana bread, wine, cheese, watermelon. I practically had a mini meal courtesy of the grocery store

My grocery store is pretty awesome.

And once again, I had to stop by the store pharmacy for a prescription, and now not only the head pharmacist but all the workers in the pharmacy recognize me b/c I have to go there so often. I really HATE having to go to the pharmacy so much.

Yes it is embarrassing having to go so often. But luckily the staff where I go seem to non judgemental. But it is most certainly a pain.

Manarinorange · Aug 18, 2024, 02:24 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nammu

Flying dreams are awesome. I haven’t had one in a while

After my mom passed away, I was having dreams that I was a teenager and I was trying to hide that I was going to parties and I was trying to hide it from her. I wouldn't have them every night but often. There's a gut I follow on instagram and I find him very sexy. I've been having dreams about him and I connecting in a psych hospital. I'm like 24 or so. Way before I sought out help for my bipolar. It's weird.

Manarinorange · 03:02 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LadyShadow

Me and my boyfriend broke up. It's been EXTREMELY hard. This is the second heartbreak I have suffered in a year. It has put a real strain on my sobriety, all I wanted to do was get completely smashed this afternoon in a bar, but I ended up driving to a meeting instead. I was very quiet and my head down, so after the meeting two ladies I know followed me to my car to make sure I was okay - I love them more than you know.

What I decided to do was go get a pedicure. I literally haven't had one since LAST MAY, ugh. Not only did I get a pedicure, but I got the "Heavenly Feet" spa one for $75 - I sat there for two and a half hours in the massage chair, with tears rolling down my eyes, thanking God for his Grace and this wonderful life that I have. I WILL NOT LET A MAN take away all I have worked so hard for; my sobriety means everything to me.

I'm so sorry! Yes don't let a man derail you! You are a tough beautiful woman. You will get through this. This too shall pass. 🥰🥰🥰 I also admire that you went to a meeting instead of getting drunk. I used to be a binge drinker when I was hypomanic and my mom would watch my son I would binge. Congratulations that you didn't. I'm happy you have a good support system.

Manarinorange · Aug 18, 2024, 02:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BeyondtheRainbow

It suddenly hit me a couple hours ago that this week I have to meet my temporary therapist. And that makes my real therapist being gone feel very real. I don't want to do the temporary thing but I don't think I'd do well with 6 weeks of nothing. Her bio on the website sounds nice enough. It doesn't say she has a lot of experience with bipolar. I'm sure she'll be fine, I just miss my real therapist already and this will drive home that I won't see him for 6 weeks. I missed last week but that felt natural since I was supposed to be on vacation. Normally though I'd be on vacation and then the next week see real therapist, not some stranger.

It will be fine. It's only a few sessions. Even if I hate her I can cancel the rest and white knuckle it. But I'm still do anxious I need a PRN to sleep. Until tonight I've been falling asleep early. this week.

Just 6 weeks......

You can do it! Maybe try gratitude. It really could be worse. Bc I'm on medicaid I have never had a long time therapist. Once they get experience they leave. Right when I start trusting them they leave.

The therapist I have now hasn't left. But I'm burnt out on therapy. Music helps me more than actual therapist. But idt I need trust to do cbt for my anxiety.

I'm not trying to say what you're going through with not having him for 6 weeks. He will be back and you can come away stronger. Use your grounding skills. You'll make it through it! 😊

Manarinorange · Aug 18, 2024, 03:19 AM

Peaceful day. My wound is either itching or I get burning pain. My son didn't call today.

My sisters surgery is August 29th. Two days after my birthday. I'm very worried about it. I feel so bad for her, it's like being mute. I did speech therapy with her and it was very frustrating for her and me. I'm going to go visit her again this coming week. I think I'm going to order her some kind of basket with like candles and bubble baths stuff.

Pretty level bipolar wise.

Blue_Bird · Aug 18, 2024, 08:33 AM

I started learning how to crochet two days ago. I figured it’d be a good relaxing hobby to help my anxiety. So far I made a tiny hat for my cats lol I’m happy because I feel like I’m making progress with it since starting two days ago. I know there’s a lot of mistakes and it’s not perfect but it’s actually something

as you can see she’d rather play with it than wear it lol

I slept good last night. Got up today and played some videogames. I have my volunteer shift with the rescue cats today

Blue_Bird · Aug 18, 2024, 08:55 AM

I’m so sorry for your breakup LadyShadow. I am glad you were able to do some self care for yourself. It takes time to grieve the end of a relationship. Things will improve over time. Keep being kind to yourself

Blueberrybook · Aug 18, 2024, 10:39 AM

@LadyShadow
I'm so sorry to hear about your breakup with your boyfriend. ((((HUGS))))

LadyShadow · Aug 18, 2024, 10:53 AM

Thanks so much you guys for all of your amazing advice and responses, I truly am so lucky to be part of this thread, a part of this group, and a part of all your lives. You truly make me feel wanted and at home.

It's a work in progress with my boyfriend - we are taking things as they come and trying to work things out - I think the biggest lesson in all of what happened yesterday is that it took a breakup for me to actually go and do something nice for myself - it really shouldn't have to come down to that for some self-care.

@JaneOnceMore - kudos to you on finding God and a higher power. I have found strength through connecting with Him and going to my church. Church isn't for everyone, but connecting with God can be a personal, private and wonderful thing. Congratulations on your journey.

@BeyondtheRainbow - I applaud your strength for being able to move forward with a temp therapist, I know how hard it can be, especially when you have a good rapport and history with your other one.

As for me it's been a quiet day. Went to church this morning and received a very good Word. Have a lot to think about today, but definitely enjoying spending the day with my parents. Truly grateful.

Mountaindewed · 02:18 PM

I'm watching the new Dance Moms on Hulu. Its the same BS that the first series was although I guess the new teacher is slightly less of an abusive a hole, but not by much. She defiently has some screws loose though. My stomach is decent today. My moods are ok but I've been distracted.

I looked around last night at other mental health forums in case this once closes. I could only find one and it didn't seem to have a coffeehouse like sub or any check in threads like this one. Idk how I'd feel about starting over after 8 years of being on this site.

Moose72 · Aug 18, 2024, 01:54 PM

Going back to the dr tomorrow. Still having itching and burning despite being on the estrogen cream for several days. I should get my tests back by then I think. Got therapy tomorrow too.

HALLIEBETH87 · Aug 18, 2024, 02:19 PM

Man. that extra risperdal makes me tired. i slpt til 11. idk what time i finally fell asleep last night. then i took a 2 hr nap.

Similar Threads
Thread	Thread Starter	Forum	Replies	Last Post
Bipolar Check-in #75	raspberrytorte	Bipolar	987	Jul 08, 2023 02:44 PM
Bipolar check-in # 66	BeyondtheRainbow	Bipolar	998	Jun 23, 2022 03:31 PM
Bipolar Check-In #49	fern46	Bipolar	992	Sep 08, 2020 09:13 PM
Bipolar check-in #42	Nammu	Bipolar	993	Feb 08, 2020 11:09 PM

Menu

Bipolar Check-in #81

My Support Forums