[Blueberrybook]

@June08 Resting is good too. Especially since you are off from work. I don't do a lot most days, and like @Blue_Bird I get overwhelmed when I have a busy day, even if it's appts. or errands, just anything out of the ordinary really. Even picking up groceries curbside and putting them away or starting a meal like gumbo that requires prep and to start cooking earlier than most of my meals. I require a LOT of downtime.

@LadyShadow - It's great to hear you had a good day! Definitely cherish those times

@Blue_Bird - I love your fish So colorful and vibrant. I hope your rolls turn out. The recipe looks delicious!

I've had my usual morning. My morning walks are getting hot though. I usually start when it is still dark, but sunrise is getting earlier and earlier. I sweat so much now; I actually took a cold shower by choice today even though the hot water works fine now.

I read 1.5 hr with my SAD lamp then painted a coconut. It was rating as having a high degree of difficulty in my tutorial book, and yes, it wasn't easy. I still wish it had turned out better though from a distance it's maybe decent? I'm really not too sure. I really do enjoy painting food, and I ordered a painting snacks tutorial book from Amazon today; I hope I will have fun with it.

[Nammu]

Blueberry I think your coconut turned out pretty good. I agree with the book, that’s hard. All that white and the outside texture. It definitely looks like a coconut.

I’m soso, I slept late and still not very awake. I’m wondering if I should stop my seroquel at night. I’m dragging in the am. It’s only 25mg. I see my pdoc Tuesday so I’ll discuss it then. Have a grocery delivery coming today. Need to get to my art and reading. Unlike blueberry I’m not a morning person and tend to be more active in the early evening. I’m crepuscular and blueberry is matutinal. I’ve always been a house cat. Blueberry is a honeybee! we do injoy the same activities but at different times of day.

[unaluna]

A lady wrote a decluttering book about that, classifying people that way! Your funny! Im a caterpillar. A hundred year caterpillar.

[Moose72]

I walked 5,000 steps today!

[Mountaindewed]

My sunglasses came today. They are light tinted so I see everything in orange. Which is good because they aren't real dark and people can see my eyes. And I can see really good since they are prescription.

I'm doing my laundry now. I'll probably work on my closet tommorow.

I wish I could figure out this weight issue. I'm hungry again and its just not good with my GI and heart stuff

Possible trigger:

my endocronolgist told me I will die in 10 years if I don't get things under control now

I don't get why I can't just snap into healthy eating habits and behaviors with that ultimatium.

[MuddyBoots]

I went back to my apartment today, but when I changed my address I got a coupon for only $20 for a membership to Costco and I figured it was a good deal so asked my mom if she wanted to come with me to verify my membership and pick up the card and all.

There's one Costco in NH. It's RIGHT on the Massachusetts border. NH is sales tax free, MA has crazy sales tax so of course everyone on the border comes up here to buy shyt (I believe it is also why the largest liquor store in NH is pretty much across the street from this Costco, and pretty much all our big malls are 30 minutes of the border by highway). It was mid-day on a Saturday with weather that makes shopping more appealing than barbecuing, going to the beach/mountains/lakes, etc. That place was BUSY!

So back at my mom's for now, going to ask to get dropped off before she makes herself dinner.

[Crazy Hitch]

I’ve woken up with some type of virus. Blocked nose and really sore throat. Thankfully I have Monday off work due to a public holiday so I can just focus on getting better!

[Moose72]

N3 is playing a Bach fugue on the piano on the 22nd at church! I’ll definitely be there and they broadcast live plus put up a recorded YouTube video on the church’s channel. I hope it’s one of the 4-part fugues he’s been talking about!

[Mountaindewed]

Can you go cold turkey off valium? I haven't had any today since my med box isnt filled up yet and I feel fine. But I think I'm going to need it later. When I've tried going down before I literally shyt my pants from withdrawels. My therapist was trying hard not to laugh when I told her.

So yeah I need valium.

GI stuff

Possible trigger:

I got sick so many times this afternoon my throat feels raw right now. GI doc says I'm at risk for a cancer with basically a zero survival rate

Why can't I see the issue.

[Blue_Bird]

I got a ticket to see the new How to Train Your Dragon movie for Friday June 13th. Looking forward to it. I love those movies. I used to have all the other ones on DVD. I think they’re on Disney plus now too which I have. Anyway, I’m doing pretty good. Haven’t dissociated in nearly 2 weeks. I got some sunscreen and aloe Vera sun burn relief gel. I burn really easily during the summer, got burnt yesterday.

Tomorrow the pest control people are coming to do their quarterly inspection in the morning. Then I have a meeting with my housing specialist around 11am to go over goals and whatnot.

I took a 3 hour nap today. I slept well last night but I started reading this morning and just got really tired suddenly and crashed on my couch for 3 hours. Must have needed it. I did have a busy day yesterday.

My sister surprised me by texting me today telling me that she had a gift for me she’s dropping off tonight for my birthday. She was gonna do it the other day on my actual birthday but she was working. So that’s exciting. She’ll be stopping by around 8pm tonight.

I feel good, mood is really good. Stable.

[Crazy Hitch]

Yes you can go cold turkey off Valium (I have) but why is your pdoc prescribing it so much that you’re addicted? Ideally you should probably taper down but don’t listen to us on the internet you should be having these conversations with your pdoc.

[Mountaindewed]

My pdoc is kinda an idiot. I told him I was out of control with my xanax and taking it more then I was supposed to and running out early and his response was
"How about you try valium instead?"

[Crazy Hitch]

I’d be getting a new pdoc

[June08]

My mood has been alright today. I got to see a friend who recently moved out of state. She was in town to give a talk at a lunch event. The event was structured so I was able to chat with her for a bit before she gave her talk. It was nice to see her, nice to get a free meal (she invited me as the one free guest she got), and nice to have something to get me out of the house for a bit. I stopped and got myself a coffee on the way home. Since I got home, I read a tiny bit and have just been on my phone. I don't really have the motivation to, but I need to get a walk on my walking pad in yet today. Walking is so important for managing my POTs symptoms. I'll do that after I post this.

The only other weekend plans I have are Mass tomorrow and going to get a haircut. I have a haircut coupon that expires tomorrow so I definitely need to go. Hopefully, it won't be to busy even though it will be Sunday.

[June08]

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

I got a ticket to see the new How to Train Your Dragon movie for Friday June 13th. Looking forward to it. I love those movies

I really like those movies too. I hope you enjoy the new one!

[LadyShadow]

Another awesome day! I went to see John Wick - Ballerina and it was absolutely ridiculous. Explosions, tons of fighting, gun fights and flamethrower fights! John Wick himself even showed up so I am thinking this is a prequel type movie. But the movie itself was so stupid, I just went to see all the action, so it was good. I thought I would be there alone again in the theater, but thankfully some people showed up.

I went to a meeting before the movie and made a new friend! She was really nice, and we went to dinner, and I got to know her. We are looking forward to walking trails in the summer! I feel so much better, I really needed to get out there and make new friends. I was trying with the girl from NextDoor, but she scared me too much, lol.

Anyway, I love your coconut @Blueberrybook !! Thank you so much for the kind words, I am going to cherish the good days for sure! @Blue_Bird I hope you make it out to the movies next week, I want to see How to Train Your Dragon too, you have to tell me how it is! I might see it too.

Praying for more good days like these! Hope everyone has a great weekend!

[Nammu]

I’m trying to watch the broadway show with Clooney but it’s live and the captions are delayed, very irritating. It pretty much follows the movie goodnight and good luck from 20 years ago. Good show though,…but the captions are really irritating.

[Crazy Hitch]

Been lying in bed all morning but impossible to sleep with my son around. Going out for lunch in half an hour. Might have a salad or their roast lamb. Haven’t decided.

[BeyondtheRainbow]

@Mountaindewed Not taking valium can cause vomiting.

[Moose72]

I am wide awake even after Klonopin! I gotta get up early for church! Oh well. Guess I can just lay down with my eyes closed?

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by Moose72

I am wide awake even after Klonopin! I gotta get up early for church! Oh well. Guess I can just lay down with my eyes closed?

The cat’s asleep next to me!

[Blue_Bird]

I need help from my program manager to help me get a payee. I’m so terrible at managing things on my own. It’s been like 3 months of me being my own payee and I’ve been horrible at it. I’m too impulsive, I overspend too easily.

I’m dissociating tonight and crying and wishing I was dead because I feel like such a failure. I’m 31 years old and I can’t manage my own life apparently.

[Moose72]

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

I need help from my program manager to help me get a payee. I’m so terrible at managing things on my own. It’s been like 3 months of me being my own payee and I’ve been horrible at it. I’m too impulsive, I overspend too easily.

I’m dissociating tonight and crying and wishing I was dead because I feel like such a failure. I’m 31 years old and I can’t manage my own life apparently.

I had two extra, large bills to pay this month and now I have $5 to my name. I am my own payee and have been since the beginning. In fact, I racked up my credit cards a few months ago when manic as a result of taking prednisone! So yeah. It’s hard! My mom has all my credit cards. I’m going to need my vet card to pay for my cat’s annual check up. Then I’ll have 6 months interest-free to pay of the charges. But I’ll just have to cut back some more! My mom and I need to redo my budget as things have changed. Btw, I’m 53. So yeah.

[Moose72]

Found a parking spot at church. Going to walk to starbucks soon. Been listening to a Take 6 documentary. Had breakfast and took my meds. This is our last Sunday for the choirs and bells until we come back in the Fall. Doing a piece with the kids choir. That should be interesting. They’re not very loud so I think the adults will sing over them but we’ll see.

Walked to Dunkin. Starbucks was closed! I got a donut and a water. I’m broke! Klonopin is making me feel funny today. Probably part that I only slept a couple hours.

[Blue_Bird]

Originally Posted by Moose72

I had two extra, large bills to pay this month and now I have $5 to my name. I am my own payee and have been since the beginning. In fact, I racked up my credit cards a few months ago when manic as a result of taking prednisone! So yeah. It’s hard! My mom has all my credit cards. I’m going to need my vet card to pay for my cat’s annual check up. Then I’ll have 6 months interest-free to pay of the charges. But I’ll just have to cut back some more! My mom and I need to redo my budget as things have changed. Btw, I’m 53. So yeah.

I’m glad you have your mom to help you Moose I’m gonna go back to having a payee. It’s been so hard to manage on my own. I think part of it was I was never prepared on how to manage a budget on my own. I had a payee since I was 19 and I’m 31 now and just became my own payee a few months ago