People Ignore Me

The people in my life pretty much ignore me. And I don't understand why. Yesterday was my sister's birthday. I wished her a happy birthday and asked how she was doing. I haven't heard back from her. My brother and younger sister have ignored my texts for over a week now. I just check in with them or wish them a good morning. And a couple of acquaintances ignored me last week. I have the mind to quit reaching out.

I won't talk to these acquaintances again. I think it's best to remove them from my phone. I was hoping to be better friends. But that doesn't seem likely. And I almost want to remove my family from my phone. I've done that it the past and felt better because it helped me cut off all communication. For almost a year I never heard from them. And this is my family mind you.

I'm tired of feeling disappointed.

That sucks. I can absolutely see why you would feel disappointed by it.

I hate being ignored too. I'm lucky in that I don't get ignored by family - just sometimes by friends.

There's no excuse for it. It takes a minute to reply to a text message and yet makes all the difference in the world to the recipient. If people can't do that, they clearly don't value the friendship.

I am so sorry you are having to deal with this. It is very frustrating. In my experience, sometimes we have to say goodbye, even to 'family,' I haven't spoken to my only sibling in 7 years. Wouldn't have it any other way. He's a *******.

I'd rather have one person I can basically count on than ten who mistreat me. You deserve better than what you are receiving. Personally, I wouldn't be afraid to say goodbye to some of these folks. It might give you some peace of mind. I hope you feel better. No-one deserves to be ignored. It's rude.

Thanks for the response. I feel like I have to protect myself now. I will quit reaching out to family. It hurts too much. I'm trying to not let this ruin my day. I guess I need to take a nap and just let it go. I have to face the fact that I'm alone. Have been for a very long time. That's not going to change no matter how hard I try. I know... I've tried. People just don't care. If you aren't in their immediate network, you get treated like ****.

I could have written what you wrote here. I go through the same thing. I don’t know what to do either. I keep trying to reach out and make new friends and the cycle keeps repeating itself. I wish I had a better answer. I’m going to see a counselor and start journaling.

By the way, the only friends who do respond when I reach out are my PC friends here.

That sucks, I'm sorry

I am sorry you are dealing with that. I have had to unfriend people and family, too. It hurts.

You deserve better. You tried to reach out, and their "silent treatment" without any explanation is a form of emotional abuse. I googled silent treatment and found articles on how that is a form of emotional abuse.

None of us deserve that kind of abuse.

(((safe hugs)))

I agree, I also think - in fact know - that ''silent treatment'' with no explanation is a form of emotional abuse. Some people (including ''family'' have done that to me too

safe hugs to all

Thank you all for the support. I don't know why it's so hard for me to deal with today. It's really bothering me. I'm sorry to hear that you too have gone through a similar thing. Safe hugs to all

You know, in school and in society, families are painted as havens and sanctuaries and other mythical scenarios but those of us who have grown up in abuse know different. Once we get past the confusion, I think we begin to know better.

I have had to do this also, my family and some friends had to be cut off. My family would go back and forth from ignoring me to brutal bullying and attacking. Nothing I ever did met their approval; I had to cut them off. It was killing me.

Grrrrr………

hugs to all

I have this underlying belief that sisters are supposed to be close and supportive of one another. But my family is too dysfunctional for that. I just have to let it go and accept that they are not good people in my life. I feel hurt too often to maintain a relationship any longer.

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Tonight I was so upset I started thinking about ways to hurt myself. The pain I felt was too intense. I let myself cry for a while. I think that helped some. I believe now I will try to take a nap and put this all behind me. Thanks again for the support!

I don't have much family life going for me. So many times I hear about how family is a blessing in life and important. I feel like they haven't done anything for me. I don't have much left anyways. My parents and brother are gone. I have another brother who does not want to have anything to do with us. He's always been like that. And then I have my sister and she doesn't call very often. When she does, the quality of her calls are not great.

And then I feel that way at where I live, too. When I made the move about six months ago I thought that I would be in a much better place. Well the place now is different from the last place, but socially not better than before. So that's how it is with me.

@will19 sorry you have that situation. Yea, it sounds similar to mine. I don't know why it's so hard to connect with people now. One good thing... I started communicating with my half sister again. She seems like she really appreciated me contacting her. I may send her a message tomorrow. I guess the best I can do is focus on the people who do respond.

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I tried to get some sleep and all I could think about was ending it. I don't know why I'm so upset over this. I just got out of bed and called my mom. I knew if I stayed in bed I might put my plan in action. She helped me feel better. She reminded me of how I'm important to my cats. And how one was rescued from near death and now she has me to love her. I almost started crying again. I guess I don't want to abandon her or my other cat. I just wish I had a solution to my problem.

I am so sorry you are struggling, @Deilla. Is there anything nice you could do for yourself tonight that might be comforting or make you possibly feel just a little tiny bit better? Take a bath, watch a cool show or movie? Go for a walk? Play with your kitties?

I have a lot of trouble with SI and sometimes all I can do is just try to sort of change the channel. Do something else besides just focus on it. Get out of myself and into something different.

Maybe I'm not making any sense. In any event, I hope you have a calmer evening and that you feel better. And remember, don't ever use a permanent solution for a temporary problem.

Sending you positive vibes and love.

@Deilla

I’m so sorry you’re feeling this bad. Don’t forget that things often feel worse before they feel better. Can you think of times in your life that this was true? I can think of plenty of times in my life when I thought I had hit rock bottom and wonderful things came along that I never imagined would. Life is hard but life is also beautiful sometimes too. Keep reaching out to your mom and also anyone else you can. Do you have access to a counselor?

@Deilla

Please be safe. Sometimes when we feel certain feelings connected with certain memories or thoughts for the first time, it is painful. But you can get through this.

Do you know any good coping skills to use? Have you reached out to your T about these issues? Maybe those are good first steps, in addition to sharing with us here on PC. ((((safe hugs))))

I'm so sorry that you're hurting right now.

Thank you! One thing that helps me is to watch inspirational videos. I found an hour long one last night that helped me to feel better. It gave me some hope. Also I spent time petting my cat. And then I went to bed sort of early. I didn't sleep that long. Now I'm up and I feel much better.

I do have a therapist. She's an online T. I sent her a couple of messages last night. I'll hear from her early in the morning. She's very helpful to me.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Deilla Thank you! One thing that helps me is to watch inspirational videos. I found an hour long one last night that helped me to feel better. It gave me some hope. Also I spent time petting my cat. And then I went to bed sort of early. I didn't sleep that long. Now I'm up and I feel much better. I do have a therapist. She's an online T. I sent her a couple of messages last night. I'll hear from her early in the morning. She's very helpful to me.

@Deilla

(((safe hugs)))

I'm so glad you're feeling better. Today is a new day.

I like inspirational videos and music and movies, too!

I miss petting my friends' cats. There's something so comforting about cats.

I'm glad you have a T and found some hope from the inspirational videos. I hope things get better. We're all on this journey together.

(((safe hugs)))

I finally heard from my sisters. One said she's just too busy to text. And the other one said pretty much the same thing. C doesn't work so I don't understand her explanation. And A is off on the weekends. I just think it's very rude of them. Obviously I don't matter to them. There is no sisterly love there. I'm getting upset again thinking about this. I'm starting to think in a negative way toward myself... like I don't want to be med compliant. They aren't worth it. It's just it is proof that my life sucks. And things will never get better.

I have a stupid GP appointment today. I don't think it will go well. I haven't been taking good care of my diabetes. I just don't care anymore.

I know I'm in a bad mood. Thoughtless people aren't worth it. I'll try to focus on my mom and J who do care about me. I'll also think about my cats who love me unconditionally. Maybe that's enough. I guess it's time for another inspirational video.

Just wanted you to know I care and I support you and I’m thinking of you. I do understand some of how you feel. I’m there right now with my sister. She ignores me as well. I’m going back and forth...do I cut this toxic person out of my life or not? It’s very painful.

Please remember to treat yourself with kindness and compassion. Can you do something nice for yourself today? Can you distract yourself in some way?

Sending hugs and supportive vibes your way.

@Deilla

You have my support too. I understand how you feel and I want you to feel better.

I suggest you start seeking positive connections with other people, not your sisters. Just because they are family does not mean they are good people to have in your life.

I recently had a so-called friend like your sisters. She doesn’t work yet never has time when I want to talk. I have foolishly always been available when she wants to talk. I’ve put a stop to it and the friendship obviously won’t last.

It’s sad to accept the truth as it is. But there is relief in it too. There really is. There are nice people who will be happy to talk to you. You just haven’t found them yet.

Thank you! I'm a little better today. I made it to my GP appointment. I don't have anymore appointments until next week. I'm supposed to go out to eat with my mom this Saturday. But part of me just wants to stay home. I will try to go. My mom is wanting to take me out for my birthday. Maybe tomorrow I might feel better than today.