Couch 65...Where all the fun is!

Granite, take it a moment at a time and you don't know she is gonna cancel on you again.... give yourself a second and relax. Start with "Hi" and move on from there.

lol you know she always requires that I say hello to her .I always find it funny or annoying depending on my mood .today I may find it annoying but I will do it because she will not let up until I do .she says stuff like hallo again or did I say hello or I know you can say hello .or whay no hello today again hello etc....

I remember once we spant most of the session with her talking about the significance of saying hello or responding to someone saying hello in life because I normally will nor respond to someone I don't know well saying hello

I just hate to see you saying you aren't gonna talk before you even get there.... Maybe you and her could get on laptops and just IM each other?

I know and last time I said the same thing but I did end up talking and it felt like I just piled on more crap to carry .but I sould probably stop saying I wont talk .I do talk way more then I use to .more times then not. I think in the last 4 sessions I have only been silent for the whole session once. im just stupidly scared and tired of carrying all this crap and with no idea how to put it down and don't want to add more. scared ill break

maybe we can make a deal everytime I ay I am not going to talk you can remind me that is not who I am anymore

I so get this, its like if you don't talk about it then you don't think about it and the more you put "out there" its hard to put back, is it like that? If so maybe you should pick one thing and talk it into submission and then move to the next? Like a list approach? For me I felt like I opened way to many cans of worms at once and it got real messy real fast.

Lola... will you find out soon about future or is this like a couple weeks of waiting to here about job?

thanks lola you know I love you right

A wokshop for Chinese cooking, no doubt.

HI CE... this isn't a usual time to see you on PC...what time is it there?

Well about the job, probably next week although it's along the lines of what I'm doing now , just with more authority and direction.

one thing i hear (and believe) over and over is that you SURVIVED all that horrible trauma and abuse. THAT was the terrible part. What you have left over is scary, and I completely understand that sentiment--but the abuse is over. You can face yourself and make it through to the other side, because you are so, SO much stronger than you think. My T was fond of telling me over and over that it takes so much more energy to hold all this stuff in and hide from it and stuff it down than it does to release it.

7:15 am.

I am up early.

I hope you have a good day at work CE

my T says some of the same thing .she tries to help me understand the reasons for telling and how in my head it is so much bigger then if I just put it out there .but wow sometimes it just doesn't seem that way at all.

Wow...I don't visit PC yesterday and I miss over100 posts. At work now so I will have to catch up when I get home. Teacher took kids out to run off some energy...2 kids wanted to stay inside, so I am sitting with them.

Have to catch up on cleaning when I get home as well before another inspection. I wish the roaches would go away already.

Well the kids are starting to chase each other around the room, so I better get off my phone. Post again when I get home.

But of course!

Hello all. Back from T. Just some light talk about the past and some present day stuff. We didn't move mountains or anything. Maybe next week.

But then I went and got a hair cut. I feel groomed even though there is hardly no hair left in my head.

Ugh.. Wrapped in a blanket on the couch. This stupid cold is kicking my butt! I hope everyone is doing well today!

Juice it up Healed! Carrot Orange juice is perfect for a cold. Preferably organic. I hope you feel better soon!

Jerz...glad t went ok. You don't have to shatter earth every week you know!

Waiting for the onc to call back on the medicine. I told the secretary I really needed the doc to call me back, but she of course had the nurse call me and the nurse didn't know anything about me, so she said "I should have the doc call you" .. Grrrr. Maybe I'll go for a swim, a light swim to loosen up a bit.

I hope they call you soon Wiki.

Sorry - TMI.

Did not see the post, Mast, but hope you're okay.

Thanks, mkac - I am, it was just some thoughts I had about a post on another thread, and I realised after posting that I wasn't quite comfortable sharing those details (and people might not be comfortable hearing them, either). But I'm okay. Thank you.