Couch 79: Spend some time on Couch 79 (snap, snap)

i try to think of it as solving mysteries. I knew i was a burden, as mkac had written about the kittens being, waking up to feed them. but when she wrote of the joyous parts, i saw that was missing from my life. I dont want to say alternative universe again, but wow there it is. Now i just need to find me a wayback machine

I had it deleted. I seem unable to formulate my query so that people can understand I am looking only for their experiences and not comments about how I do therapy or attempts to analyze me.

Kittens are adorable.

Ah. Yeah. Stuff like that is why I pretty much limit my questions to the couch. I have ventured off a couple of times recently, but the results are decidedly mixed.

hi peeps . im tired today .

How did the class go, Granite?

Its like you want to google people. I agree, Polling probably is a better way to get the answers you are looking for. A thread implies more willingness to engage? Rather than a search for info. Do you text search the internet? Like well defended is a pretty common phrase. Hmm. Plus, if someone were truly well defended, that might preclude them from sharing their experience. Ironic, huh? You would only get unconsciously defended answers! Thats why psychology has to engage in such trickery to do their experiments. Or therapy?

I did also do a search for the phrase but it was either used a phrase along side other psycho-speech or it was not about therapy at all. So it really did not give me an idea of it comes up for others during an appointment with a therapist or not.

Lol. And I miss NorCal and the 'bad weather'. This desert is growing on me though. I guess it's home now.

Good for you for standing up for yourself and your needs

I must have missed your thread, stopdog. I know that for some reason people seem to be very eager to give unsolicited advice to you - more so than to many other members. I don't really understand why since you are always quite clear about the fact that you don't seek such advice.

Halfway through the weekend. Listening to an old recording of my choir - we sound pretty good!

I've called myself a thing a few times in therapy. Often we'll project the stuff we think about about ourselves onto T too... For me, I've often felt like a thing that belongs to other people.

I'm sorry about that SD. I enjoy your threads - you ask some good questions. I guess sometimes it's hard to remember that people are different and the same solutions don't apply to everyone.

I found some stuff re group therapy - ormont.pdf - that was interesting. It was about well defended and not at all well defended peeps. The google appended psychology to the search term. Then it rather suggested emotional defenses, and from there you just kinda get into pop psychology period

Yeah, all of this.
I was using an example of soothing a crying baby in T yesterday (I was referring to taking care of myself) and I couldn't agree with him when I said that I found it gratifying to make the baby feel better. I feel like it's a bad thing to take anything for myself from the act of helping another (or even myself it seems). I do find it gratifying to be able to help someone. I just think that it's wrong somehow that I do. I guess this explains a lot of why I hate asking for help, and I feel like I have to pay people back tenfold for small favors.
And I feel like it's not fair to blame my mom for it, because she was an abused and neglected child too. But, then again, I don't do it with my kids, and my dad was a lot more supportive to my mom than my H is to me...

My mother used to tell me that she was such a beautiful baby, people used to fight over getting to hold her. The story ended there! I got the message that nobody was fighting over the chance to hold me. And i heard that story many many times. And i always turned the other cheek.

How effin good can i be? I cant take it anymore. I cant be the grownup anymore.

Hey, couch! Quiet around here, how is everyone tonight.

This poem just popped in my head.... This is what my mother used to say to me...

There was a little girl
BY HENRY WADSWORTH LONGFELLOW
There was a little girl,
Who had a little curl,
Right in the middle of her forehead.
When she was good,
She was very good indeed,
But when she was bad she was horrid.

Feeling inexplicably annoyed with t tonight.. Which is stupid because he has been so great to me and my family during bil situation and my recent episode trying to hold myself together. Stupid me.

Tired, headachey. Tried to bring the 6 year old to see her My Little Pony movie. It stormed and the power went out. Got soaked, and then got stuck in traffic. Ended up having hotdogs and hot chocolate. Came home to H feeling sorry for himself, mainly because of the fight that he tried to pick last night that I was having no part of (talk to me when you get over yourself and stop asking me for money, you make more than I do and it's not my fault you can't manage it properly). He wanted to 'make up' (excuse me while I lol). Now the 6 year old wants me to play. Argh! Telling her not now doesn't make me my mother, right?

I see we had the same mother, in spirit.

My mother used to quote that to me, too!

Thanks!! Hubby's not too happy with me for standing up for myself but tough toenails. I'm sure my equilibrium will be restored once my feet are firmly planted on AZ soil again!!

As much as I really want to get home, I'm not so much looking forward to sitting in the car allllllll day. I fell on my butt a little over 3 weeks ago out on the patio in my backyard while trimming a tree, I landed really hard and I think I cracked my tailbone or something because it still hurts more than 3 weeks later. Now that I think about it maybe that's why I've been out of sorts lately. My stupid tailbone hurts!!!!!

Hope everyone on the couch is well!!!

In regards to the rest of the psychotherapy forum, I wish PC had a "hit-you-on-the-back-of the-head" button or a "I'm calling bs on this" button.

Too much energy-healing, Scientology-suggesting, bizarro questionable T's that people are encountering. I am so pissed at everyone out there taking advantage of vulnerable people in treatment. But sometimes I want to shake my fellow clients too----don't you know a scam when you see one?

To the pc users whose mothers quoted the poem to them. Did it ever make you cut your hair? I remember hating the curl at the front and cutting my hair quite short which resulted in more trouble.