Couch 121: An Intimate Chat.

You have a much greater range of emotica than she does.

Gooooooood morning couchies! Been up for awhile, just getting around to breakfast, then I need to do a little straightening up around the house before I leave for t in 2 hours. H is off on a job, he'll be getting home about the same time I get home from t unless they give him something else. Not really in the mood to clean - maybe I'll just stay here on the couch....

oh and totally random. I have sensitive earlobes, most earrings bother me after having them in for not even 15 minutes. Awhile back I bought a pair that said nickel-free, and they don't bother me, I guess I'm allergic to nickel. Now I'm on a quest to find nickel-free earrings, since with my hair short, they show again, I want to wear them more. I don't know what the pair is made out of that I am wearing today, they look like they're plastic - but I can't imagine that. Obviously they're not nickel, since I've had them in for over an hour and can't feel 'em at all. Something about this getting mentally healthy is turning me into a girly-girl. I've been wearing makeup, and earrings, oh my, what is happening to me? ha ha.

Happy Saturday couchies, and hugs to those who want them.

I'm about to attempt the next hardest task after putting clothes on a live fish. DD2 needs a haircut, and she can't sit still even with sedation. Wish me luck!

That was not mentioned earlier. That much unnecessary and overly emotional punctuation would cause me physical pain. How did you ever bear her in person?

I have a high pain threshhold. And I find it amusing to study them in their natural habitat.

Hello new couch. Page 9 and I don't think I've posted once.

Anyway, I'm currently paranoid. Took meds late so that is probably why. Really wishing I could text t but we not yet talked about out of session contact and I don't have her number anyway. The counseling center is likely closed now. Anyway, I'll see her in 4 days.

The horse rescue organization that I am involved with just got wind of a herd of 90, yes 90, horses that need to be purchased before going to slaughter. That is a lot of horses and a lot of homes to find and a lot of cash to raise. It's almost too bad for me to bear.

Wow that was an intense session. Well, the last few minutes anyway. I don't know what happened, but we were talking along just fine working on a couple dreams and about the work I need to do with my animus and then somehow some way closer to the end we went a little deeper than we ever had before and I kinda went away there for a few seconds and as I shook my head and swam back up t was like you went away there, I said yeah I know... she goes "we went deeper" i said yeah. These feels that came up hurt. I stopped on the way home and texted her 'Ouch, putting my money where my mouth is and feeling these feelings.' she replied that I am doing very hard work and said thank you. So much for not having therapy hangovers anymore. I'm in a bit of a fog right now.

A Melissa song that's making me feel better, sorta reminds me of t:

While I am still feeling these feelings, I'm going to go bake some bread. Kneading the dough sounds like just the ticket. What I told her at the beginning of my session is true for these feelings also and for that I am very very thankful. That I can still look deeper than the current feelings and know my happy is still there and it holds me up. And I know, difficult as they are, these too are just feelings that I will work through and then let them go.

I am so very, very blessed.

Art, that reminds me of a book my therapist has sitting out, called Uncovering Happiness. I find it irritating as truck, but that's because I'm allergic to positivity. From reviews, other people seem to like it.

You're a much much better person than I am.

I totally judge people -- especially therapists -- by the books on their bookshelf.

What about number of books? No. 1 had only two, like on display on her windowsill - I did not know at the time but they were about EFT (Hold Me Tight was one of them). For some reason they disappeared halfway through my time with her.

No. 2 had a bookcase full, about trauma, anger management, EMDR, and abusive relationships.

No. 3 had a small shelf full, one of them also Hold Me Tight (this is when I connected it to EFT), the other two I remember are a medication guide and one called Motherless Daughters.

Maybe this should be a thread: what books does your therapist have in their office?

My T has a lot of books

Sent from my SM-G900V using Tapatalk

Yes! Start the thread!

Current T has escaped scrutiny because she doesn't have an office of her own -- only sublets different offices depending on the day of the week. I have though managed to judge her vicariously by judging the bookshelves (mostly filled with psych-lite pablum) of the Ts she sublets from -- I mean if she knows them / is friends with them..........guilty by association etc.

Ahem...........the books disappearing from No.1's shelves is the ultimate sign of her true lurve for you. I would've totally questioned their disappearance -- in a spirit of totally innocent curiosity though.

I am so tempted to check out 'Hold Me Tight' now -- it sounds like just the stuff I need (to cheer me up post yet another awful session that I just had with current T today). Did you read it?

In a minute...I didn't read Hold Me Tight, mostly because the title reminded me of a line from a song in a horror film, but here's the author's/EFT's website, which should satisfy the itch. (Warning: it made stopdog nauseous.)

I just got back from an excellent jazz concert; one of the songs they played was A tisket, a tasket. I filmed a short snippet but am not sure it's possible to upload films here... anyway, it made me think of @@, which gave me a kind of warm fuzzy feeling.

I give people warm fuzzy feelings?

Oh, I'm sorry - I meant no offense.

I'm not offended at all! Just puzzled, because that doesn't fit my view of me.

And I'm glad it was a good concert and they played my song.

Sort of like the stuff thats at the bottom of that "live" apple cider vinegar

Eta - you know its supposed to be good for you, but it makes you pucker

I'm gonna ask my t if she has that book and if she does if I can borrow it. I know she has a lot of books - they're not in her office, but she has mentioned before that she might move them into there. She's recommended so many to me and I have read some of them, ones I could find at either the library or the used bookstore while we did phone sessions, and I've borrowed some from her as well since she's been back in town.

I'm definitely not allergic to positivity. I find practicing it very helpful (most of the time). It doesn't really work when I'm around my mother.

I made a pizza instead of bread - well I guess it's really the same thing, pizza is just bread with toppings. It's baking now. And, I whipped up a cake for good measure that baked while I was making the pizza and letting the dough rise. Good eatin's at my house this afternoon!

And I'm feeling better already. Letting myself feel my feelings, even the ones from t earlier, and then letting them go isn't such a bad thing after all. I told t as I was leaving, that I wasn't going straight home, and I didn't. I didn't cry, which is what usually happens when I'm fighting to NOT feel, but I couldn't look at her as I left either - cuz then I would have. I just gave her a thumbs up over my shoulder and let the feelings come and got in my car and turned Melissa up super-loud as I drove away.

((Crocus))

Going to check it out now based on the fact that it made stopdog nauseous, that means I'll probably love it.

eta i didn't meant that to sound bad. just that, i've gotten an ack or two when i have described my sessions before.