Couch 121: An Intimate Chat.

There is no guarantee of closure even if you do it in person. You can't turn off a relationship, even a bad relationship, at the flip of a switch. Nor over a set of four termination sessions.

You might get closure with acquaintances, but I think it is a myth that you can get closure with intimates. You just have to grieve.

PS: Some sort of ritual, like a funeral, might be more effective.

This conversation just reminded me of going to the dr.'s office and filling out forms, on which they ask if you are married, single, or divorced. I got divorced 10 years ago, so aren't I single now??

I asked about that once. The recep said they just wanted to know who was responsible for bills.

WHAT???? How the actual [expletive] is your marital status going to indicate that? It's no longer the 1930s...

... and no, that has never been a question on any form I've filled out in this country.

What is a blow dry bar?

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Yeah seriously. She said sometimes when a person is divorced, the ex's health insurance still covers as part of the divorce settlement. That may be more olden times now - older auto execs. But ball players may have the same deal. Here, health care before so-called Obamacare was linked to ones work pay package, and often to one spouse.

Ah, yes, I've heard about that. Still, I could understand if they ask about whose name is on the insurance, but they can't magically know that from someone's marital status...

Sorry. This makes me fly right off the handle. I don't mean any disrespect, but casual sexism upsets me, especially when it's from the authorities...

i am feeling so emotionally crappy and tired today .

What is a blow dry bar?

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Its like a hair salon, but all they do is blow your hair out. No cut or dye. I assume no wash? For people with thick hair like yours!

Yeah, I decided that back in June. No. 3's a few hundred miles away anyway. In terms of closure the problem is this: 1) I really want to tell No. 1 off for getting way too emotionally invested in me (it was like I was some kind of surrogate daughter), and 2) No. 3 and I stopped in the middle of something, which will be addressed with No. 2, but unfinished business bothers me.


Logically, yes, my future ex-husband is my current husband, to distinguish him from my ex-husband. But I'm divorcing future ex post-haste. And I like the term - as unaluna put it, "Anyone can have one!" I'm hoping I have at least one more future ex-husband...well, maybe we can skip the ex next time.

This conversation just reminded me of going to the dr.'s office and filling out forms, on which they ask if you are married, single, or divorced. I got divorced 10 years ago, so aren't I single now??

Speaking of forms. I have a 6 page form I have to fill out before my son goes to his next therapy appointment next weekend. They want to know when he first sat up, and walked, and all kinds of early developmental stuff I'm going to have to get into his baby book to find out because I don't remember. In my own defense, he IS almost 18.

There is no guarantee of closure even if you do it in person. You can't turn off a relationship, even a bad relationship, at the flip of a switch. Nor over a set of four termination sessions.

You might get closure with acquaintances, but I think it is a myth that you can get closure with intimates. You just have to grieve.

PS: Some sort of ritual, like a funeral, might be more effective.

Quarrel with Partner with me being punished with silent treatment if I don't apologise. I don't know what I did wrong.