Couch 179: Even-numbered days in a year

I went to Claire's accessories store on saturday with my little sister, they sell stupid things like hair bands but i just realized now that the woman charged me twice for the same item. It sounds stupid that i didn't notice before when i entered my pin but in front of the card reader my path was blocked by a mother and daughter blocking the till. i have the name of the woman who served me on the receipt and she might remember but i'm not hopeful if i can get my money back. i just feel stupid. i'm going to go back to tomorrow and try my luck and ask them to check CCTV if they can to prove i only had one item as that's the only thing I have. But it might have been erased so $@&$.

I rarely pay attention when I'm checking out somewhere. Unless the total is just some huge amount that's way off the charts, I don't even notice. I just assume the computer was right cuz I don't do math in my head (i still count on my fingers i'm not kidding lol). I'm hoping it's been wrong both in my favor and in the store's favor enough times to cosmically even it out....

Thank you artie, I'm surprised by how much this triggered me. My first thoughts were honestly and I began to cry. I want R.

I like the idea of everything balancing out in the end.

I'm sorry that it's triggering you so much. I wish I had also said before that you're not stupid. You are definitely not stupid!!

19 months of therapy and deep down I still don't really believe it yet.

It takes as long as it takes, as my t is fond of saying. It has taken me almost 7 years of therapy to finally come home to myself and start speaking my truth. It takes awhile to rebuild a foundation when you have to still live in the house. I know that sounds a little una-ish, but... I hope that makes sense outside of my own head.....

I have a lot of respect for your Lemoncake and for so many others here. We are getting there, all of us, in our own time.

I need to be finishing up my homework...

That does make sense more so that today I watched Grand designs- a show where they build their own homes.

I'm going to email R because of you. If I'm being honest I'm ashamed of some of the things that I told R when he first came back from his holiday which involved my cousin, that and the fact that I've put weight on that he would think that I was disgusting. I bought him cake but it got squashed in my bag- I didn't do that right.

Is it statistics again?

yep... since I work full time I'm taking only one class a semester... next semester too. After that, it'll just be filling in some general ed stuff that didn't transfer from previously so will probably do 2 classes a semester.

Do colleges normally let you just take random courses without enrolling into a major? I need to brush up basic grammar and writing skills along with basic math skills. I also need to take a course on excel due to changes in my job.

Yes, some of them do that. I’d particularly check into community colleges if any are near you (they also tend to be cheaper!)

Does anyone watch the series 9-1-1? It's freaking awesome!

Anyway, season 2 premieres tonight. I'm so excited

Yes-we have several “County”
Colleges in my area. I shall ring them tomorrow. I just always thought you had to be working towards a major, but maybe as long as they get their money then it should be okay.

OK so lessons I’ve learned from T: if I’m out and ask H if he wants me to come home now or if it’s OK if I stay out for a bit, I take him at his word. Especially when I’ve explicitly offered “I’m totally good coming home right now (or stopping at grocery store first), just let me know.” Like if he gives me a “whatever you feel like doing,” that’s on him, not me. Right? I can’t deal with passive-aggressive BS anymore. I offered, he said he didn’t care, I’m taking him at his word.

Yes, I took a few courses at one before pursuing my masters to catch up, since it was a different field from my undergrad. I think maybe you’re right about the money! Or at least, it doesn’t matter why someone is taking the class, as long as they have students.

Yes and also, even if he doesn't want you to stay out, you don't need his permission.

True! And because he had stuff going on yesterday morning/afternoon, I was in charge of D for a big chunk of time (and a very stressful chunk of time with fun stuff like being rear-ended), so I feel like it balances out.

Of course now he’s all being lighthearted and joking with me over text, so I don’t even know what the f***.

I forgot I wanted to try this show, thanks!

Just signed up for a 5K in November (doing first one next month)--figure I need to keep up the momentum. It benefits a local high school, so win-win.

It's so good BUT very graphic at times... so it could be triggering for some. I had to skip season 1 plane crash episode because of my bad flying anxiety. Everything else I could handle though

So cool you do those. I'm not that motivated, lol. I do walk my dog daily but we never go even close to that far

Hey couchies. Just left my weekly CODA meeting, I got my 2 month chip today. Where does the time go?? I like this group a lot, the meetings are helping me stay mindful of my particular codependent behaviors so I can catch myself in them and use my recovery patterns to get out of them. I think it's the combination of both these weekly meetings and seeing t weekly that I'm doing some kick *** work this summer. Oh but it's fall now huh lol

I had the weirdest dream right before I woke this morning. In all of my dreams last night I was traveling-by car, by train, on a boat even. This dream, I was driving and everywhere I stopped this man showed up. The first time he had a gun, and I was scared and ran away. The second time, he got out his gun and I wasn't scared, so he shot it into the air, and I was scared. The third time, he shot at me, and I got scared.

The fourth time he actually shot me in the shoulder. I sat there for a minute thinking, "Ow," then realized I wasn't injured at all. It had hurt but didn't even leave a mark. So I got out of my car, and walked over to him telling him that was quite enough of that, he couldn't hurt me, and to knock off the stupid tantrums.

Man, that felt good.

What do you do with your chips, Art?

LT: What response from his text makes you think he was being passive-agressive?