Home Menu

Menu


Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #501  
Old Mar 12, 2014, 05:45 PM
newtus's Avatar
newtus newtus is offline
The Dopamine Flux
 
Member Since: Jun 2010
Location: Ardenweald
Posts: 43,644
something very embarassing happened in college one time. i was in a class and was completely psychotic. standing by the window in front of the class the whole time. then i asked the teacher where his car was. and he just looked at me real crazy.
__________________
"We're all born to broken people on their most honest day of living"

The Dopamine Flux
www.thedopamineflux.com


Youtube channel
https://www.youtube.com/user/MozePrayIII

Hugs from:
Atypical_Disaster, Erti

advertisement
  #502  
Old Mar 12, 2014, 05:45 PM
RRex's Avatar
RRex RRex is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Jan 2014
Location: Seclusion
Posts: 255
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alonewithmycat View Post
If the churches in America paid taxes, it could house every homeless person and provide food stamps for everyone who needed them in the whole nation. Fact somewhere I read.
I'm all for churches paying taxes. Maybe they wouldn't hog real estate like they do here in the Midwest.
  #503  
Old Mar 12, 2014, 05:46 PM
RRex's Avatar
RRex RRex is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Jan 2014
Location: Seclusion
Posts: 255
Quote:
Originally Posted by newtus View Post
something very embarassing happened in college one time. i was in a class and was completely psychotic. standing by the window in front of the class the whole time. then i asked the teacher where his car was. and he just looked at me real crazy.
I had my first psychotic break at work in front of my supervisor. I hear your pain.

The clients were saying really bizarre stuff to me and I demanded that I be allowed to go home.
Hugs from:
Atypical_Disaster, Erti
  #504  
Old Mar 12, 2014, 05:47 PM
junkDNA's Avatar
junkDNA junkDNA is offline
Comfy Sedation
 
Member Since: Sep 2012
Location: the woods
Posts: 19,305
people are inserting thought of suicide into my mind and its driving me crazy i feel on edge like i am breaking down maybe its best to give in to them T says es very worried and to take mre meds but they arent helping i have to go see te pdoc with him tomorrow. but how am i gonna get thru tonight without killing ymself. dont know.
__________________
Hugs from:
Anonymous33445, Atypical_Disaster, Erti, Gr3tta
  #505  
Old Mar 12, 2014, 05:53 PM
Erti's Avatar
Erti Erti is offline
Princess Tutu
 
Member Since: Jun 2011
Location: Nowhere
Posts: 7,913
Quote:
Originally Posted by newtus View Post
something very embarassing happened in college one time. i was in a class and was completely psychotic. standing by the window in front of the class the whole time. then i asked the teacher where his car was. and he just looked at me real crazy.
In high school I was walking home from school. Apparently I was talking to myself and my friends mom saw me and then makes fun of me to my friend while they were driving home from school. My friend told me about it. Not sure why but it made me want to slap a bi_ch.
  #506  
Old Mar 12, 2014, 05:54 PM
punkybrewster6k's Avatar
punkybrewster6k punkybrewster6k is offline
Grand Poohbah
 
Member Since: Oct 2013
Location: USA
Posts: 1,670
Quote:
Originally Posted by newtus View Post
im definitely gonna do school online. i need the guts to actually goto school though like GO TO a school inside.
Try taking ONE easy neutral class in school to start? That may help.

Sent from my SCH-S720C using Tapatalk 2
  #507  
Old Mar 12, 2014, 05:56 PM
punkybrewster6k's Avatar
punkybrewster6k punkybrewster6k is offline
Grand Poohbah
 
Member Since: Oct 2013
Location: USA
Posts: 1,670
Quote:
Originally Posted by newtus View Post
oh i thought you were talking to me.
Im talking to both u and Rrex.

Sent from my SCH-S720C using Tapatalk 2
  #508  
Old Mar 12, 2014, 05:58 PM
RRex's Avatar
RRex RRex is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Jan 2014
Location: Seclusion
Posts: 255
Quote:
Originally Posted by punkybrewster6k View Post
Im talking to both u and Rrex.

Sent from my SCH-S720C using Tapatalk 2
Hi punky. Nice to meet you.
  #509  
Old Mar 12, 2014, 05:59 PM
faerie_moon_x's Avatar
faerie_moon_x faerie_moon_x is offline
Elder
 
Member Since: Nov 2011
Location: I live in my head. :P
Posts: 6,358
I am too ill to be understood by these so called normal people I work with. Do you ever get to that point where you are talking to people and you see they have never met someone like you and are floundering because your so much more powerful than them mentally, and the clarity and understanding you have of the world frightens them? But you forget they can't see through their fog of media fed garbage and all your doing is making them terrifies of you???

This happens to me a lot. It's why is so hard. To make friends for me personally
__________________


Hugs from:
Atypical_Disaster
Thanks for this!
Atypical_Disaster, newtus, punkybrewster6k
  #510  
Old Mar 12, 2014, 06:00 PM
Atypical_Disaster's Avatar
Atypical_Disaster Atypical_Disaster is offline
Elder
 
Member Since: Mar 2011
Location: Nowhere noteworthy.
Posts: 7,145
Quote:
Originally Posted by faerie_moon_x View Post
I am too ill to be understood by these so called normal people I work with. Do you ever get to that point where you are talking to people and you see they have never met someone like you and are floundering because your so much more powerful than them mentally, and the clarity and understanding you have of the world frightens them? But you forget they can't see through their fog of media fed garbage and all your doing is making them terrifies of you???

This happens to me a lot. It's why is so hard. To make friends for me personally
Wow, I understand this feeling all too well.
Thanks for this!
faerie_moon_x
  #511  
Old Mar 12, 2014, 06:00 PM
RRex's Avatar
RRex RRex is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Jan 2014
Location: Seclusion
Posts: 255
I'm the Village Idiot, so that's a no for me.
  #512  
Old Mar 12, 2014, 06:02 PM
punkybrewster6k's Avatar
punkybrewster6k punkybrewster6k is offline
Grand Poohbah
 
Member Since: Oct 2013
Location: USA
Posts: 1,670
Quote:
Originally Posted by junkDNA View Post
people are inserting thought of suicide into my mind and its driving me crazy i feel on edge like i am breaking down maybe its best to give in to them T says es very worried and to take mre meds but they arent helping i have to go see te pdoc with him tomorrow. but how am i gonna get thru tonight without killing ymself. dont know.
You can talk to us here junkdna.
(((hug)))

Sent from my SCH-S720C using Tapatalk 2
  #513  
Old Mar 12, 2014, 06:05 PM
RRex's Avatar
RRex RRex is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Jan 2014
Location: Seclusion
Posts: 255
I'm still thinking "what can I possibly say to junk to make him/her feel better". I'm pretty useless that way. I can barely take care of myself.
  #514  
Old Mar 12, 2014, 06:06 PM
newtus's Avatar
newtus newtus is offline
The Dopamine Flux
 
Member Since: Jun 2010
Location: Ardenweald
Posts: 43,644
Quote:
Originally Posted by punkybrewster6k View Post
Try taking ONE easy neutral class in school to start? That may help.

Sent from my SCH-S720C using Tapatalk 2

whats a neutral class?
__________________
"We're all born to broken people on their most honest day of living"

The Dopamine Flux
www.thedopamineflux.com


Youtube channel
https://www.youtube.com/user/MozePrayIII

  #515  
Old Mar 12, 2014, 06:07 PM
newtus's Avatar
newtus newtus is offline
The Dopamine Flux
 
Member Since: Jun 2010
Location: Ardenweald
Posts: 43,644
Quote:
Originally Posted by faerie_moon_x View Post
I am too ill to be understood by these so called normal people I work with. Do you ever get to that point where you are talking to people and you see they have never met someone like you and are floundering because your so much more powerful than them mentally, and the clarity and understanding you have of the world frightens them? But you forget they can't see through their fog of media fed garbage and all your doing is making them terrifies of you???

This happens to me a lot. It's why is so hard. To make friends for me personally

i understand this very well
__________________
"We're all born to broken people on their most honest day of living"

The Dopamine Flux
www.thedopamineflux.com


Youtube channel
https://www.youtube.com/user/MozePrayIII

Thanks for this!
faerie_moon_x
  #516  
Old Mar 12, 2014, 06:07 PM
Erti's Avatar
Erti Erti is offline
Princess Tutu
 
Member Since: Jun 2011
Location: Nowhere
Posts: 7,913
Quote:
Originally Posted by RRex View Post
I'm still thinking "what can I possibly say to junk to make him/her feel better". I'm pretty useless that way. I can barely take care of myself.
Yeah, :/ same here.
  #517  
Old Mar 12, 2014, 06:11 PM
punkybrewster6k's Avatar
punkybrewster6k punkybrewster6k is offline
Grand Poohbah
 
Member Since: Oct 2013
Location: USA
Posts: 1,670
Quote:
Originally Posted by RRex View Post
Hi punky. Nice to meet you.
Ello Rrex!

Sent from my SCH-S720C using Tapatalk 2
  #518  
Old Mar 12, 2014, 06:13 PM
Erti's Avatar
Erti Erti is offline
Princess Tutu
 
Member Since: Jun 2011
Location: Nowhere
Posts: 7,913
Here's something for a laugh

Here?s What Happens When You Ask A Bunch Of Adults To Label Male And Female Reproductive Systems |
  #519  
Old Mar 12, 2014, 06:14 PM
Anonymous33445
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
@junkDNA, hang in there. Idk if you're agitated but if you're like me, realize that it's not you thinking. It's like a different person and there's no talking sense into. Make sure you don't take extra antipsychotics unless you're allowed too cuz you won't breath trust me it's complete hell. If you have benzos then that should make everything a lot better and then sleep. If not listen to music any type that synchronizes with your mood.
  #520  
Old Mar 12, 2014, 06:14 PM
Anonymous59893
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sometimes psychotic View Post
So I bought a book managing anger with cbt for dummies...the dummies books are always so funny. So I'm reading along you know like 2-3 pages in in just the general background section and for some reason it clicked in my brain that I am really angry at having been sick and that I never really got to express it. I mean sure I thought it was unfair but I was so drugged up on APs that all my actual I think legitimate anger was never expressed. I think that is why the forum has been a little triggering lately...I mean I'm just getting my emotions back to their normal strength and that was the first one that cropped up...and honestly I think I'm angry that all of you are sick and dealing with this ***** too. Because it's not even remotely fair that this should happen to any of us....it's like I thought I could just fix everything somehow but really that's not always going to be the case it's possible that things can't be fixed using the tools we have have now and that's incredibly frustrating for me both as a person and as a scientist. I need to find a new balance with this so I may be in and out for a while.


Quote:
Originally Posted by KUREHA View Post
I feel like I'm going to explode though if I don't talk to that stalker. I'm trying hard not to, because the police will know, but it's driving me crazy.


Quote:
Originally Posted by punkybrewster6k View Post
Okay.
Talked to Bean and she agrees to hospital even though she doesnt want to go she feels she needs to.
She seems safe today and cant wait to see everyone there.

I have to remind her that many of those new friends are probably back home from the last time she was there in October.

But she is a little excited to see staff and make new friends......what a beautiful mind she has.
Hope Bean gets on fine in the hospital. All the best to you both

Quote:
Originally Posted by junkDNA View Post
does anyone have trouble taking meds when they hear voices? my voices tell me not to take my meds. and if i do they freak out on me.
Yeah my voices sometimes make me believe that I don't deserve to take meds, or eat. It's hard to argue with them at times like that.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Atypical_Disaster View Post
I feel like it fits what's going on. I can't really deny it anymore so... yeah. Currently I've crashed into mixed and it's not fun at all. I'm hoping the Trileptal can pull me out of this state because god, it seriously really sucks. My thoughts are still racing, I feel just as impulsive as when I'm manic, and a bunch of other crap. I could talk on and on all day but I don't want to bore you all with my unfantastic life so I'm still rambling anyway and oh there's thoughts all over my head right now racing back and forth and all over the line between the point of the hearing off the top head down up whatever. Oh dear. Yeah,. not doing so well. Isn't that wonderful? I have a hard time with knowing where the walking in point is. What does it mean when I collapse into a point and there's nothing left of me? I'm hearing voices, I think I might take my PRN of haldol but I'm not sure.

WTF did I just write? Ohgod, I'm losing my ****!
Sorry you're feeling mixed right now. I hate being mixed so much!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Alonewithmycat View Post
So I went to the ER with a panic attack. Terrifying. I don't have panic attacks often.

On the hospital bed for a while warm blanket shaking violently couldn't breath. Went home with benzo and slept. First time I felt normal in a year.

Too much cortisol in the body way too much.

When I relaxed they said wow your heart rate was 160 but still had to wait for it to go down.

There's no way that I would tell them that my heart rate sometimes goes to 240bpm..

Calm calm calm.. Please I don't want anxiety today I will sleep when I get home


**TRIGGER FOR MENTION OF SUI**
So today I was out with my parents and we bumped into a woman my parents knew. She's the mother-in-law of this guy who committed suicide in Oct leaving a wife and 2 young boys. Apparently he was in the same ward I was in, and was actually a voluntary patient there when he killed himself. There's currently an inquest into his death because he was seen wrapping things around his neck, his wife warned the staff not to let him out on leave the next day as he was very suicidal, and they let him out anyway, where he then took his own life.

My parents were asking her how everyone was coping, and then my Mum outed me to this woman, telling her I was sectioned last Nov! I was so angry! Then we got talking about how the staff had failed this guy, and how they'd treated me. And Mum told her (a complete stranger as far as I'm concerned!) about my attempt on the ward and how bad the staff were...

It just brought up all these memories and feelings that I've been trying to bury, and I had to try really, really hard not to cry in the middle of a coffee shop Mum later apologised for outing me, and said that I'd been neglected lately what with everything else going on, asking how I was doing and if I was struggling. I said I was fine, though I'm not really sure if that's actually a lie or not. Then she asked if I would actually tell her if I was struggling, and I laughed which she, accurately, took as a no.

It's just so complicated...She's not well and really stressed, so I don't want to burden her or Dad. Then there's the fact that anything I tell her will be relayed to the CMHT, and I don't want that because I don't trust them. And then there's the tiny part of me that is angry and upset about the fact that she got me hospitalised and I had to experience all of the horrible things that happened there, and the fact that they (staff) completely dismissed me and now I have no one IRL I can talk to. It's just really hard right now

Also I've been telling myself that I'm going to go to the MH centre tomorrow and do some craft cos they've got an art/craft class...but now it's tomorrow and I don't really want to go :/ I'm scared of new places and new people, plus the last time I went to the centre to make mince pies, I felt like I didn't belong there and ended up running the cooking class because I was the only one (including the 'teacher') who'd ever made mince pies before! Right now I'd rather stay at home hiding under my duvet than go to the centre :/



*Willow*
Hugs from:
Erti, Gr3tta
Thanks for this!
newtus, punkybrewster6k
  #521  
Old Mar 12, 2014, 06:18 PM
punkybrewster6k's Avatar
punkybrewster6k punkybrewster6k is offline
Grand Poohbah
 
Member Since: Oct 2013
Location: USA
Posts: 1,670
Quote:
Originally Posted by newtus View Post
whats a neutral class?
I dont know what classas are available there but something simple. Read through what the school has to offer. Talk to someone in admissions who can guide you to an intrest. Ask for something with very little stress.

Sent from my SCH-S720C using Tapatalk 2
  #522  
Old Mar 12, 2014, 06:22 PM
Anonymous59893
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Quote:
Originally Posted by junkDNA View Post
people are inserting thought of suicide into my mind and its driving me crazy i feel on edge like i am breaking down maybe its best to give in to them T says es very worried and to take mre meds but they arent helping i have to go see te pdoc with him tomorrow. but how am i gonna get thru tonight without killing ymself. dont know.
When I feel agitated and/or suicidal I pace my room for hours. Maybe that will help you? Remember though, if you don't feel you can keep yourself safe 'til tomorrow, then go to the ER Really hope you'll be ok

Quote:
Originally Posted by faerie_moon_x View Post
I am too ill to be understood by these so called normal people I work with. Do you ever get to that point where you are talking to people and you see they have never met someone like you and are floundering because your so much more powerful than them mentally, and the clarity and understanding you have of the world frightens them? But you forget they can't see through their fog of media fed garbage and all your doing is making them terrifies of you???

This happens to me a lot. It's why is so hard. To make friends for me personally
Faerie

It takes me so long to write a post, it's ridiculous! You guys did 2 pages while I was writing my last post :/

*Willow*
Thanks for this!
punkybrewster6k
  #523  
Old Mar 12, 2014, 06:26 PM
RRex's Avatar
RRex RRex is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Jan 2014
Location: Seclusion
Posts: 255
Willow, I understand your heartache. My mother betrayed me in the same way several times. It ripped my guts out. She almost gave my private journals to complete strangers.

for you.
Thanks for this!
punkybrewster6k
  #524  
Old Mar 12, 2014, 06:28 PM
Anonymous59893
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Plus my postural hypotension is back IDKY though cos I'm on barely any meds... Sorry for moaning so much

*Willow*
Hugs from:
Erti, Gr3tta
Thanks for this!
punkybrewster6k
  #525  
Old Mar 12, 2014, 06:29 PM
Anonymous59893
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Quote:
Originally Posted by RRex View Post
Willow, I understand your heartache. My mother betrayed me in the same way several times. It ripped my guts out. She almost gave my private journals to complete strangers.

for you.
Thanks and back RRex

Do you mean hospitalised you, or outed you, or both (they both are betrayals of sorts really)

ETA: Sorry, somehow I missed your last sentence. Yeah that'd make me mad. Heck I'd be mad if she read my journals, let alone gave them to strangers to read!!

*Willow*
Reply
Views: 50789

attentionThis is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.




All times are GMT -5. The time now is 09:00 AM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2025, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.




 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.