Roll Call 168 =)

Sometimes psychotic · Jun 23, 2020, 09:53 AM

I sooo don’t want to do this interview because I’ve got to drive etc. I keep trying to tell myself that the temporary pain and inconvenience will be worth it. I know I do better when I’m working and that working is a reality of life. Trying to picture myself in the role, if not this one then another. Gotta remember the mouse allergy and not my cognition as the reason for leaving work.

Idk just sitting here wanting to cry instead. This is just an entry level position....I can handle this.

If not this one then it will be a learning experience and I’ll be better prepared for the next.

newtus · Jun 23, 2020, 09:53 AM

Thank you desoxyn!!!

newtus · Jun 23, 2020, 09:53 AM

I took a nap

bpcyclist · Jun 23, 2020, 09:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sometimes psychotic

Anyway, got a job interview tomorrow so naturally I only slept four hours. Thanks anxiety.

Good luck, Sometimes!!

Sometimes psychotic · Jun 23, 2020, 09:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by newtus

I took a nap

Do you feel any better....

Sometimes psychotic · Jun 23, 2020, 09:55 AM

If we didn’t have covid, I think I’d Uber to the interview...it’s just too much stress all at once......

Sometimes psychotic · Jun 23, 2020, 09:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bpcyclist

Good luck, Sometimes!!

Thanks! How are you today?

Sometimes psychotic · Jun 23, 2020, 09:59 AM

Ok falling back on a classic, the Indiana Jones theme song. I used to listen to it before big exams when I was in college.....

bpcyclist · Jun 23, 2020, 10:01 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by newtus

True but with the medical stuff, my doctor is an hour and a half away and I just don’t wanna make that drive at all, whatsoever. I absolutely hate long drives. Plus cvs does ear cleaning but there’s only one cvs in this town and it doesn’t have a minute clinic. Ugh. Maybe I can go somewhere else in this town.

The depression, idk. Maybe I am depressed. It seems as if the depression (for no reason) is underlying and when I get even worse into depression, it’s for a reason. So double whammy against me. Double edged sword w/e.

Man, idk what’s wrong. Idk anymore. Between the severe psychotic episode I encountered a week or so ago and this depression, I really, really want to give up on my life goals. Like I haven’t really been inspired, or writing, or reading, or anything. I’m pushing myself to post on social media. That’s why I haven’t been doing anything, I’m so exhausted from my mental health and I feel like if I’m not being productive at this point, then what’s the point at all? I’ll just sit around and sleep or do whatever.

Sending you strength and love, newtus. I hope your day turns around soon!!

WastingAsparagus · Jun 23, 2020, 10:02 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sometimes psychotic

I sooo don’t want to do this interview because I’ve got to drive etc. I keep trying to tell myself that the temporary pain and inconvenience will be worth it. I know I do better when I’m working and that working is a reality of life. Trying to picture myself in the role, if not this one then another. Gotta remember the mouse allergy and not my cognition as the reason for leaving work.

Idk just sitting here wanting to cry instead. This is just an entry level position....I can handle this.

If not this one then it will be a learning experience and I’ll be better prepared for the next.

You've got this!!!

WastingAsparagus · Jun 23, 2020, 10:03 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sometimes psychotic

I sooo don’t want to do this interview because I’ve got to drive etc. I keep trying to tell myself that the temporary pain and inconvenience will be worth it. I know I do better when I’m working and that working is a reality of life. Trying to picture myself in the role, if not this one then another. Gotta remember the mouse allergy and not my cognition as the reason for leaving work.

Idk just sitting here wanting to cry instead. This is just an entry level position....I can handle this.

If not this one then it will be a learning experience and I’ll be better prepared for the next.

Also, as you say, even if you don't get the job, interviews are learning experiences (always). I remember interviewing for English teaching positions when I lived in Buenos Aires. It took soooooo many interviews to finally land something. Work is just full of learning experiences, too.

Sometimes psychotic · Jun 23, 2020, 10:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WastingAsparagus

Also, as you say, even if you don't get the job, interviews are learning experiences (always). I remember interviewing for English teaching positions when I lived in Buenos Aires. It took soooooo many interviews to finally land something. Work is just full of learning experiences, too.

Thanks wasting asparagus....I really appreciate it. Just trying to flip into the right mindset.

bpcyclist · Jun 23, 2020, 10:10 AM

It took me a long time to learn that interviewing is a skill.

Slept well and feeling pretty okay so far today. Would like to write some today. Hope everyone has a very nice day.

Sometimes psychotic · Jun 23, 2020, 10:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bpcyclist

It took me a long time to learn that interviewing is a skill.

Slept well and feeling pretty okay so far today. Would like to write some today. Hope everyone has a very nice day.

Yay for sleep! Enjoy the writing

Sometimes psychotic · Jun 23, 2020, 10:17 AM

Sometimes psychotic · Jun 23, 2020, 10:24 AM

Hey Newtus sorry if I was harsh but I can see you’re at a crossroads. Basically you can fall back into the sick role or you can develop meaningful coping skills and pull yourself out of it.

I’ve seen you do it while you were working. Apply those same skills now and you’ll be golden.

Blue_Bird · Jun 23, 2020, 10:34 AM

I love practicing mindfulness. Accepting things as they are. Letting go of judgements, letting go of worrying. Worrying does nothing but cause me to suffer. I can’t control the world. Whatever happens in this life, happens, no need to get hung up on whether we like it or not. It is what it is, and I can look at it objectively without judgement. This has been the biggest help in dealing with my anxiety.

Blue_Bird · Jun 23, 2020, 10:44 AM

Woah we’re already on page 97 of roll call

Blue_Bird · Jun 23, 2020, 10:46 AM

I have an appointment with my therapist Friday. Will be nice to talk to her. It will be over the phone but after that our meetings go back to in-person, same with doctor.

I weigh 158 lbs now, down from 161 , it’s a start

Sometimes psychotic · Jun 23, 2020, 10:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

I love practicing mindfulness. Accepting things as they are. Letting go of judgements, letting go of worrying. Worrying does nothing but cause me to suffer. I can’t control the world. Whatever happens in this life, happens, no need to get hung up on whether we like it or not. It is what it is, and I can look at it objectively without judgement. This has been the biggest help in dealing with my anxiety.

Do you have a resource you use for mindfulness?

Sometimes psychotic · Jun 23, 2020, 10:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird

Woah we’re already on page 97 of roll call

I blame it on the new guys

Blue_Bird · Jun 23, 2020, 10:51 AM

Good luck with your interview SP!

Blue_Bird · Jun 23, 2020, 10:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sometimes psychotic

Do you have a resource you use for mindfulness?

I read different mindfulness books I can find from the library, and I use a meditation app called Balance, there’s a lot of websites that have free articles and stuff on it too