Bipolar check-in #70

Those look really good.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mountaindewed Those look really good.

They were

Today's the last day of my doctor ordered quarantine. (Five days since symptoms appeared. ) The combination of bed rest and antivirals seem to have done me a load of good! As of right now, I only have a dry cough and some congestion. I'm optimistic this last day will take care of those in short order.

As far as work is concerned, it's looking like I'll be out the full ten days. I haven't received any communication from anyone about returning to work after five days. I'll ask tomorrow. If I can get them to agree and my symptoms go away after today, I'll be back to work Tuesday, albeit with a mask. Small inconvenience if I can get back to it!

There's continuing good news on my mom's cornea transplant. The surgeon who did the procedure (the one who did the happy dance) was so pleased with the results he doesn't feel a need to have her and my dad drive three hours one way to see him. The normal doctor can do the followups just as well as he can. So, she has a followup tomorrow and this will be the big one. The docs think things are on the up and up! I really hope so!

Those bubble teas look amazing beth! I love boba. I like to get it with the different flavors of the popping boba in the bottom, haven't tried traditional boba with tapioca pearls yet though

Glad you had a good day Sunflower celebrating your BIL's birthday

I hope your Son in law recovers soon Nammu

Glad you're starting to feel better Aurelius! I hope the rest of your symptoms go away quickly. Also I'm glad to hear the good news on your mom's cornea transplant

I'm sorry fuzzy, I hope things get better

I'm sorry you almost passed out, that is a really scary experience to go through

I hope your kidneys results are okay when you get your bloodwork done and that your doctor is able to figure out something to help you with the feeling like passing out too

Hope you feel better too from the covid symptoms soon

Went to my friend's house yesterday, we played the Digimon TCG (trading card game) was a lot of fun. He won the first round, and I won the 2nd round. Was nice to get out and socialize

Got up at 4am, I fell asleep really early last night, like 8pm. I was laying down and I had my weighted blanket on and Mustachio was laying on me purring, it was just so warm and cozy, and I had my music playing on my bluetooth earbuds, didn't mean to fall asleep but I did and suddenly it was 4am, so I got up for the day then. Did some laundry and cleaning up around my apartment. Getting on the treadmill in a little while. Excited for Halloween, not sure what I'm doing, probably just watching horror movies at home with my cats. I have an appointment this upcoming Friday to get the permanent crown put in (have a temporary one on where they did the root canal) so I'm glad that will be finished. Then I will have 2 more appointments there for other things I need done, then that's IT. Finally, it's been 7 months of dentist appointments. Glad it is almost over. Then I just need to go back for regular cleanings every 6 months. Seriously regret all the damage I did to my teeth from the purging I did for many years. And feel really self conscious. Can't change the past I guess, so I guess I shouldn't dwell on it.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Aurelius710 Today's the last day of my doctor ordered quarantine. (Five days since symptoms appeared. ) The combination of bed rest and antivirals seem to have done me a load of good! As of right now, I only have a dry cough and some congestion. I'm optimistic this last day will take care of those in short order. As far as work is concerned, it's looking like I'll be out the full ten days. I haven't received any communication from anyone about returning to work after five days. I'll ask tomorrow. If I can get them to agree and my symptoms go away after today, I'll be back to work Tuesday, albeit with a mask. Small inconvenience if I can get back to it! There's continuing good news on my mom's cornea transplant. The surgeon who did the procedure (the one who did the happy dance) was so pleased with the results he doesn't feel a need to have her and my dad drive three hours one way to see him. The normal doctor can do the followups just as well as he can. So, she has a followup tomorrow and this will be the big one. The docs think things are on the up and up! I really hope so!

All such good news!

I'm doing pretty good today. I haven't been eating very much these last few days, then I've had the covid issues and worrying about going back to work and worrying about my kidneys and the new therapist, and all that was just causing a lot of anxiety. But I really wasn't eating enough which wasn't helping anything. Last night for dinner I ate a twice baked potato after not eating much all day. And I felt a lot better. This morning at 1AM I ate the second one and then for breakfast I ate two pouches of tuna and I realized eating enough and eating decent stuff really does make a difference. So my anxiety has been pretty low today. My mom is out getting my valium filled right now and I haven't had any yet since yesterday afternoon so I'm starting to feel it right now. I still have the post nasal drip but its not too bad. When I cough this weird sound comes out. But overall I'm doing better then I was yesterday. Mainly because I've been eating today. My mom is also doing some shopping and getting more potatoes and some stuff from Alids

But yeah this entire day I haven't had the crippling anxiety I've been getting these last few days and I've had coffee today too so I guess I really just wasn't eating enough.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blue_Bird Those bubble teas look amazing beth! I love boba. I like to get it with the different flavors of the popping boba in the bottom, haven't tried traditional boba with tapioca pearls yet though ...

I've tried mango bubbles, passionfruit bubbles, but tapioca is my favorite. The bubbles are fun And I love lychee milk tea with egg pudding in it.

I've done one of the stupidest things someone who takes psych meds can do, which is that I allowed myself to run down to only 1 Klonopin tablet this week-end. Completely forgot to pick up my new prescription on Friday, despite telling myself do not forget to pick up that prescription on Friday. I opened my pill box yesterday and said Uhh-ohh.

So, I'm splitting that single pill into bits and yes, I feel weird already. I hope I'm not downright sick by tomorrow morning, because I am so physically dependent on the stuff. The pharmacy I use is a local small business, owned by the same family for 100-something years. It's a wonderful little pharmacy, except for their crap hours (such as not being open on Sundays). Ugh.

However. The weather could not be more gorgeous. 72 degrees and a strong Pacific breeze. I am loving it! Perfect skating weather

I only have to heat up dinner tonight. I made a crock pot pork roast the other day.

Im not sure how many more days I can tolerate the Steroids. My mood is being effected by them or this job or likely both.

This beater truck has the worst headlights ever. I mean the roads aren’t marked at all around here but Ugh ! Now that the grass has all died it’s hard to tell the road from the pastures/fields. Steve ordered a set of super bright lights and he’s putting them in today. I have really been on edge driving home at nights.

He’s also installing a CD player in the truck that we have sitting around. I really don’t like listening to the radio I much prefer my Rent Soundtrack.

Most of the pretty leaves are long gone off my trees due to a storm that came through a few weeks ago but I’m loving this one.

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The leaves are falling like crazy today. I keep thinking it’s snowing they are coming down so thick. This keeps up the guy who does the lawn will need dozens of bags to get them all.

Such a beautiful photograph @~Christina, with the golden sun beaming through the trees.

Leaves like snow, so truly autumn @Nammu.

Had to call David about a few practical matters and he started the call off by spending 20 full minutes going on about the air-headed stuff he reads in his New Age books. Life is an illusion. Our bodies aren't real. Dah, dah, dah. On and on. And on. The fact is that he cannot cope with reality. Life terrifies him, death terrifies him 10,000 more. The concepts he reads, then preaches - the concepts have value, I believe. But the way in which he uses them is so self-centered. So avoidant. It's always me who has the burden of reality. Me who has to be practical. He doesn't get it, doesn't appreciate it, he never will, he just abuses me and demeans me. I sit here feeling absolutely alone, abandoned, I feel like Anne Boleyn going to have my head chopped off simply because I exist.

I'm not doing the best. Still don't have a home.

Trying to decide whether computer programming or CPA is a better route for me to take.i need to figure it out fast because either one is a long road and I'm running out of time. CPA can make more in the end and it's a longer road. I would love to be an academic advisor but that's not remote and if I'm going to be successful it has to be remote. I need to generate money because I can't keep living like this. Where we are moving is very expensive. Miguel doesn't plan on ever moving out again but that will change with age.

My parents say I'm handling it well but they have no idea our plan to get off all assistance because of this. I really don't know if I can succeed with this. We'll see I guess. I need something remote, part-time but pays well. So I don't know which direction to go I can do a double major I guess and decide later. I'm just done fighting so hard for the minimum. I know I truly can't work but I have to do something.

I ordered these collars for Maybelle and Mustachio, so they can be festive for Halloween and Christmas

Awwww how cute 🥰

I was remembering a photo you posted of Maybelle looking pleased as punch in her little bowtie collar. I'm picturing her being the same with the new collars!

I might have jinxed myself a tiny bit. My congestion has turned into a massive amount of slow drainage. If I leave it be, it feels like the drainage cuts off my airway as well as my nose. If I take Sudafed to try and speed the draining along, I get more severe cough. I feel it all trying to move and it does, but not to the extent needed. Either way, I didn't really sleep. This sucks because my boss might have been able to come through on me being at work tomorrow. I'll still get that COVID test if asked and I'm definitely going to call the doctor and see about well... anything.

Apart from that, I meet with my PsychNP this afternoon. I also get to call my Social Security lawyers to see if they got some forms I sent their way last week. Two days after I put them in the mailbox, I get a form letter asking where the paperwork is! I really don't want a repeat where they don't give me any information, nothing gets to them and things go south! Tricky day ahead!

EDIT: This happened in real time as I wrote this, but the lawyers picked up fairly quickly and they said everything got to the appropriate people! I am happy about that! Now for the chest congestion.

Yes Maybelle loves wearing collars, Mustachio doesn't like them at first but gets used to them after a day of wearing one. I am only putting one on Mustachio for a couple hours to get some holiday pictures then taking it off, I will probably leave Maybelle's on for the holidays since she does seem to like wearing them

I believe it was this picture

I hope you start feeling better soon

I woke up with bad anxiety but I felt well enough for the first time in 2 weeks to get some shopping done. I got some more Lunchables and some protein cheese crackers and protein cream pies and some Christmas peppermint candy the store had just put out. I know Christmas is still 2 months away but I'd eat peppermint flavored chocolate all year round if it was out. I also got my flu shot. I had to update my insurance info with them since it wasn't my normal pharamacy. So I had to go through the whole process of saying I'm trans this is my dead name this is the name I go by now etc... I had no issue with anything or anyone and the pharamacist assitant was nice and the pharamacist giving me the shot was super nice and talkactive. The flu shot didnt hurt at all. I'm feeling slightly dizzy and nauseated from it now but at least I got it done. Then I set up a dentist appointment for a cleaning for Thursday. I have my kidney bloodwork tommorow and my endocronolgist appointment and therapy on Wednesday. Its nice to be back on a schedule after that 12 day covid crap. I've started wearing my mask again. I'm not messing around anymore. My therapist told me someone she knew barely even leaves the house and got Covid 4 times.

Those collars are sooo cute @Blue_Bird 3 of mine wear collars, 2 completely flip out when I've put collars on them, so I don't try anymore because it actually gets dangerous. Two of my cats, Solomon and Jack, they are in love with each other. They do pretty much everything together...eat and sleep at the same time, spoon when they sleep. So Jack hates collars and he pins Solomon down and bites at his collar until it falls off! I find Sol's collar all around and have to snap it back around his neck. This goes on every day.

Oh wow @Aurelius710, it sounds like you're sicker than you thought you were. Sounds kinda scary. Please do what you need to to make sure your breathing is okay.

That is GREAT news about your paperwork! What a relief. Been there way too many times.

Those are both smart options @Miguel'smom. You are in my thoughts a lot. I so hope you get housing soon.

I have a therapy session in a bit. Barely slept because of stupid me forgetting the Klonopin refill I was supposed to pick up on Friday. Breaking up the single pill I had over the week-end was definitely better than nothing, but by this morning...forget trying to sleep, forget being more than basically functional. I called the pharmacy the moment they opened and so, so lucky. They sent the delivery within an hour. I took my a.m. K-pin and am finally feeling better, although very tired.

Weather stunning! Only appreciation there. I'm going to do my best to go to the ocean for my birthday in late December. The weather will be chilly, but certainly not too bad, and I love the fog we often have up north. If I could meet my son (if he's not traveling outside of the States) it would be so nice. But if I'm alone, I'll be fine. I desperately need to get out of here for a day and away from David.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mountaindewed ...

Now I want some peppermint chocolate.

I've said it before, but I really give you kudos for taking such good care of your health.

Honestly, I can't understand why I haven't caught covid yet. Seems weird. I read about these people who may have some sort of natural immunity to covid. I wondered if I'm one of them. Maybe it depends upon illnesses I had as a child, or something.

Possible trigger:

I was 25 when my aunt, my mom's younger sister shot and killed herself at the age of 60. I knew then that 60 wasn't "old," but it seemed like an understandable age to die if you absolutely must. Her suicide hurt me badly and I still miss her so much. I have thoughts of going to the ocean on my 60th birthday in two months and just walking into the water and disappearing. I thank the Universe I have the cats to anchor me to earth, since there is only me to care for them and they deserve the best. There were 2 people in my past who I was so in love with, but now one is married and the other is back in his native country. I feel I let them slip through my fingers too easily. I left both of them. I often wonder about the choices I've made.