Bipolar Check-in #88 (again!)

Oh deer!

The article didnt say what happened to it!

@Mountaindewed my husband got heart failure at 40. Scariest thing ever. His dad had several heart attacks by age 55. Please be careful and follow Drs orders.

I'm trying to be careful. I don't drink coffee or Mountain Dew anymore and I'll stop the Aleve.

I drank 26oz of carrot juice and I had an acai bowl for breakfast

Weight TW



I feel kinda off physically right now. Just tired mainly. My stomach hurts a bit but I took Tums for some heartburn. My anxiety is fine.

Honestly, she probably became someone's pre-workout or date night "wanna see how much of an aphrodisiac a good medium rare venison roast is?"

You don't really get hit by a plane and survive (as a deer. A moose, different story). You don't really die as a deer if you're not in too many pieces in an audience in NH and go without being eaten or becoming taxidermy.

!

I can't wait to meet all the man-eating moose out there in the mountains this spring and summer ready to eat up all the Flatlanders

(we don't hate tourists, we hate tourons)

Oh, my neighbor I thought was having a really hard time because she was yelling and hitting stuff and up all night?

Yeah, no, she has mice she's been yelling at "get out" "assholes!" that have been waking her up and she's been trying to attack. The "authoritative voice" and commotion in the hall wasn't the police--it was maintenance. Nope. It's an all woman's building, of course mice are a greater source of neuroticism than any other.

I feel a little uppity today. Maybe it was all the glorious snow that accumulated this morning... Yes! ACCUMULATED!!!!

I also really have to pee but my bathmate is in the showahh. I'm hoping to reach page 200 of Little Women today too, but I'm gonna wait until I'm done laundry to start reading. 16 quarters down today (had to do two loads). Glad the Dollar Tree is now the Buck-twenty-five tree otherwise I wouldn't be so stocked up.

Muddy, you might like Louisa's Eight Cousins. I begged my parents for oatmeal after i read this book. They wouldnt buy me any because my brother never finished his box of May-po Wheats, which remained in our kitchen cupboard for the next 20 years.

Eight Cousins is the story of my true self vs my false self, only my false self won.

Good to admit you have a problem, muddy. For me, I got rid of all my size 0 and 00 clothes because I wanted to be able to fit back into them again and it was a trigger. It was SO freeing!

I have lost weight exercising though and can now fit back into the clothes I set aside that I could wear if I lost the weight I gained on Zyprexa. So that's good enough for me. Back to baseline, so to speak. I don't have an eating problem so much as I have an exercise problem but it is considered a purging calories through exercise so it's still considered an ED. In college I was diagnosed anorexia-purging type but the guidelines for diagnosing anorexia were different in that version of the DSM, the diagnosis came from me weighing too little, losing my cycle, there were other changes to the DSM criteria but I don't remember them.

As for me, I'm still recovering from that sinus?/upper respiratory infection?/whatever? infection. I really should not have exercised today, but what did I do? Take a power walk, though not as far as I normally go. I still have a sore throat, postnasal drip, sinus pressure, ear pressure, and for good measure, I have the type of killer backache that presages a period. Wonderful.

I was busy this morning, read with the SAD lamp a bit, cut up & sauteed chicken & sausage and diced onions & green bell pepper and minced garlic & chopped parsley to prepare for dinner (jambalaya). It makes it so much easier to have all that done in advance as mornings are generally easier for me. I folded laundry, drew 2 pics but my dove got stained with coffee, no coming back from that (still posted in the creative corner). Just had lunch and I have to get the dishwasher started and fold yet another load of clothes from H (luckily much smaller). Then, I don't know, but I think I may take some Benadryl and try to nap. I am exhausted!

Hope everyone has a great weekend!

I drew a BOO cat as well just because I felt like it

Slow Saturday at work. Just a few more hours and I can go home. I am ready for a vacation to be honest.

Doctor went fine yesterday-- sorry I didn't get around to updating.

Yeah, Blueberry, I thought I did good putting everything I know I shouldn’t really fit in again in storage in my mom’s basement (was all in my closet for too long), and I was never trying to fit back in them. I didn’t expect to but when I got back from IP everything was just so loose and I was there yesterday I felt I had to dig around and try stuff on. I didn’t take anything insanely small back (a couple size 2 jeans and a XS long sleeve for under my volunteer shirt for dog walking but that’s it that really felt more out of necessity to have something that currently kinda fits than anything).

Una—added to my wishlist!

55 degrees and cloudy and rainy here. My friend got 4 inches of snow upstate NY too. I did want to go out and go to a meeting, get my eyebrows done and spend some time at adoration, but I decided to spend the day on my couch instead, lol. Woke up REALLY tired this morning and was only able to crawl out of bed till 1pm. So crazy! I did manage to get up and make my bed and get breakfast going and take my meds. But man, I am dragging my butt today!

Spent a bit too much money this month, but that's okay, my friend's birthdays are important to me. Just going to spend the day watching movies and relaxing. It's gloomy out and not inviting to go out somewhere today.

Hope everyone is having a beautiful Saturday!

I took a nap around 12:30pm to 2pm. I was reading for 30 min then just felt super tired even though I slept good last night so I decided to take a nap.

I was feeling a little restless after the nap especially since I can’t really go anywhere right now since they’re doing the floors down on the first floor. So I got on the treadmill for 30 min. Just did the dishes. I think I used up my daily motivation today on art and the treadmill so I’m not gonna practice violin today. Some days are just like that I guess. Sometimes I have never ending motivation other days I have enough to do a couple things and that’s it then it’s depleted for the day. Sometimes I get random bursts of energy later in the day though so who knows maybe I’ll do something else later, or not The day flew by though. It’s about to be 4pm already.

I slept really well last night. Ended up waiting for my regular bedtime, but fell asleep almost immediately. Woke up this morning before the alarm. Had interesting dreams though, making a maxi skirt out out woven shoelace! 😂

Went to bingo for fun. Neither of us won, but it was fun anyway. Had a cheese thing, can’t think of what it’s called. A Mexican thing. Only ate half of it so there’s supper done.

My glasses came. They are much the same as my older pair just stronger and they are tighter which is good.

When I get done on my iPad I’ll draw. Feeling so much better today than yesterday.

I think its that 3PM-6PM time slot when I don't feel good. I did stop myself from ordering a triple cheeseburger for lunch. I'm kinda eating a bowl of condensed soup for dinner. I'm not anxious. Its just stomach stuff again. My anxiety has been ok today. I've just been pretty tired mainly and a bit barfy again.

Was it a really long shoelace or a lot of them?

A lot of them, all used dirty white cotton shoelaces from my childhood. Really weird. Weirder because I was working on this in my childhood pony’s barn. The barn magically had a basement full of Native American artifacts. Kind of cool actually.

Took a 2 hr. nap. Just completely crashed. Will have to fix dinner soon, but since I did so much prep this morning, it should be a snap, and at least, I've made the recipe before. Really wanted to work on my walking music playlist, but I'm not sure if I will get around to it today.

I know not everything happens for a reason. But I swear this is why I was meant to like this singer.

This grilled cheese and tomato soup is good


My phone is charging so I'll clean my room while I'm waiting.

I forgot that I normally take my Prestiq by now. I don't feel like I need it right now. I guess that is good. The withdrawels on round one seem to be ok now.

Awful sleep last night. Was still tossing and turning at midnight. Just couldn’t fall asleep……

@Blue_Bird some type of creative hobby would be nice. I have virtually no artistic ability though. I also need whatever hobby I would find to be free (or as close to free as possible) because money is tight. I can do a decent job expressing myself in writing, and I like to do that, so something with writing would be fun. I always thought it would be cool to write reflections or something for a website on a somewhat regular basis. I was happiest when I was really involved in my old church, but my current one doesn't seem to have as many options. I should contact the office to see if there is more than what they post online. I really miss having a bible study to go to.

@MuddyBoots I live in the Southwest, where it hit triple digits this week which my heat intolerance doesn't like. But, I am with you when it comes to getting outside when the weather is nice enough. When the temps allow, I love to get outside for a good walk!

Today has been a good balance of productivity and rest. The nurse who took care of my at my IV appointment was wonderful. After my appointment, I stopped at the pharmacy and to get a fun infusion day treat. By the time I got home from all of that and had lunch, my late morning and early afternoon were already gone. I've read some Harry Potter and got a walk in on my walking pad. As soon as I post this, I'm going to go put some laundry away. I also have a few dishes to do. i want to get to bed early tonight because I plan on getting up early to go to the 7 am Mass. This will get me home in time to get an outside walk in before it gets to hot out.

My mood has been alright today-it has been a little break from the mild depression I've been experiencing.

@June08 oh I didn't know it was that hot all week! (We just got a few inches of snow and I am sitting here shivering in my apartment with the heat almost cranked which even when I first moved here I was okay with it completely off the whole time, I wasn't really expecting you guys to hit more than, like 70s, 80s at most haha)

this was taken yesterday (not me but it was my home mountain when I regularly skied so had to post it) https://www.reddit.com/r/icecoast/co...non_today_412/

I wonder how many else out there are up at 2am doing calculus for fun going insane listening to their fridge sound like a barred owl looking for a mate?