Looking for Self-Help (Weight Loss)

I know this is a place to share self help ideas etc, but I am looking for some advice!!

I am trying to loose weight. I am 27 & about 40 kilos over weight. I have family history of type 2 diabetes, heart attacks, strokes & cancer!!!
I know that I need to loose this weight for many reasons which include my health, my chance to have a healthy baby (when the time comes) & to help my self-esteem as I looking in the mirror & despise who I see in the reflection!!

I am writing to anyone who has had to take a journey like this & I'm asking for your tips or advice!!!
I can maintain healthy eating habbits, but exercise is my fall down!!!
Many people tell me that you just have to do it.....

How do you just do it......

I know what I need to do & how I need to do it, but getting started & staying on track is hard, especially when you can be so damn lazy at times!!!!

Flinty

The key to staying motivated to exercising for me is finding something I really enjoy so I don't dread doing it. If I love it, it's not as hard to get motivated.

Yoga works for me. The great thing about yoga is that you don't need to be in good shape to start doing it. When I started, I had a bad inner ear problem and my balance was really messed up. Of all the exercises I've done, I found yoga gave me results the fastest. I noticed it getting easier each time -- and that's very motivating. Each day I was more flexible, the poses were easier, I felt like I was walking taller and was more aware of the power of my own body. It's also so relaxing. It just feels good. So, since anxiety is a problem for me, I find myself looking forward to doing it because I know how good it will make me feel. I find it hard to get myself motivated when I'm depressed, but I remind myself that it always lifts my mood. That endorphin rush I get during a good power yoga workout is awesome and the feeling stays with me.

A lot of people think yoga isn't a weight-loss exercise. I lost 25 pounds in 3 months the summer I started doing it, though. I enjoyed it so much and was improving my balance and flexibility, so I added power yoga twice a week (along with regular yoga twice a week). It works your muscles, tightens them and really makes you sweat. I was agoraphobic when I started doing it, so another benefit was that I could do it right in my living room. All I needed was a yoga mat, some comfy clothes, bare feet and a yoga video (I use the Yoga Zone series; they're very straightforward and explain the poses very well).

It improved my fitness level, I lost weight, felt better and it increased my energy level in other areas. Once I recovered from agoraphobia, I started walking more and I have recently starting jogging again. I still do yoga 3 times a week.

I sound like I'm doing an advert for yoga. LOL. I rambled on, but my point was that I think the key is to find something you enjoy. Some days we feel motivated and other days we don't. Trying to motivate ourselves to do an exercise program we don't enjoy is often a recipe for failure. So, think about the things you enjoy doing. Try some different things and you will probably find something you love. If you can turn it into a hobby -- something you do for fun and just for yourself -- it's no longer a chore that you have to dredge up the motivation to do.

Good luck. I hope you find something that's fun for you and helps you reach your goals.

Hi Flinty! My doc says weight loss is 95% diet, but that exercise is essential for health. She recommended I do 30 min. most days on the treadmill (walking fast) & do strength training twice a week (I use a DVD for that).

As far as motivation, after you've done it for a few weeks you get used to it & feel energized afterwards so you almost look forward to it. I keep a food & exercise journal to keep me motivated. I try to do a little on the Stairmaster before I do the treadmill. The Starimaster is very hard for me. I'm up to only 6 min.! But I started at 4 so I'm slowly improving.--Suzy

I hate to exercise too so try to think of ways to get "exercise" into my life day-to-day. I have a set of hand weights by my chair and when I watch television I "play" with them, just move my arms up, down, around, etc. without playing much attention.

I play a game of seeing how many trips up and down my stairs I can make and sometimes make up little rules like I can only take one thing at a time up or downstairs :-) or I think of chores half upstairs and half downstairs and alternate which I do so I have to go up or down between.

I walk all the aisles in the grocery store and I joined a gym for the shortest time they had available, 3 months, and got a personal trainer at the same time and learned about 10 exercises I could do at home with simple balls, hand weights, etc.

I wrote a short story about "John" an invisible trainer :-) and made up exercises "he" would have me do (pull a branch from a tree down to your shoulder height, walk backwards, etc.) and then thought of writing a book about the adventures I'd have with him (started with a little old lady walking her dog seeing me talking to him and, of course, not seeing him :-) but the premise of the story was that "my" boyfriend thought I was fat and made fun of me and we'd just moved in together and he could afford the gym but I couldn't and was determined to lose weight. But he kept subtly putting me down only the little old lady had a gorgeous, "gentlemanly" son and I met them again and they helped me in my life, etc. and things got worse (I was talking to "John" in my sleep and my boyfriend thought it was another man and threw me out on the street but the little old lady took me in) and then the ex-boyfriend saw me with the gorgeous guy and figured he was "John," etc.

But I often think of things like that; "invent" a scene and then go "live" it. If you can come up with an activity you can do while doing something else that is very good too. Reading while riding a stationery bike? Think of all the "chores" and things you wish you'd do and figure out how to do them. Is there any sport at all you liked in high school? I liked archery and looked up how to take lessons? I once took a temporary job delivering phone books; doesn't pay much but is a real workout.

I use to mail myself postcards each day; the Post Office was exactly 1/2 a mile away. I also use to try and think up a "story" each time I walked from the same route. I once found 9 pennies and wrote a story about the 10th penny :-) which I looked for a long time and I once decided to ask someone I met on the street for a penny :-) That was hard. But I think of challenges and fun things like that to do. I lived near a huge antique mall too http://www.savagemill.com/ and use to take $10 and walk around looking for the one thing I "had" to have that trip :-) I do that in grocery stores too; if you could have one thing for yourself in a grocery store, what would it be?

Or, think of a list like this and just do different ones. I took a 3 x 5 pad of colored paper from the drugstore and wrote 80-100 things I wanted to "do" on them and folded them up and put them in a "special" bowl and picked one a week at a special time and "did" it? I've gotten the little "treats" Glad/ZIPLOC bags and put a vitamin and a "note" in them, like a fortune cookie? Put a "routine" or activity in them and take your daily vitamin and do the activity the same time?

I bought a pedometer for work :-) and walked the hallways during lunch/breaks without anyone quite realizing what I was doing (so I didn't look too stupid :-) I started jumping up and going to see people/get supplies, etc. and volunteering to help others, etc.

Hi there --

I'm one of the "lucky ones" who have never had a weight problem, although I do have fitness issues as I get older. I have written about dieting when I was a reporter, and my hat's off to those who succeed. To take off weight safely, one has to be content with about 2 lbs a week, especially when getting off that final 20 or so. It seems to me that it takes a lot of faith that what I give up today in the way of pleasure will produce a desired result quite a good ways down the line.

I do hope you will do what you whatever you can, not beat yourself up when you fall back a bit, and keep us posted.

I give major kudos to people who have the stick-to-it-iveness to lose weight too. I never struggled with a weight problem until I quit smoking. In the months following quitting, I gained 25 pounds. (I traded my pack-a-day of cigarettes for a pack-a-day of Strawberry Twizzlers. LOL)

I have no experience with dieting and I wasn't organized enough to follow a plan, so yoga was my solution for getting the weight off.

I also gained weight while I was on Celexa. I started losing it after I stopped taking medication, but there were about 15 stubborn pounds that refused to leave. I lost that weight (and a bit more) in the fall, though. People at work kept coming up to me and telling me I looked fabulous and asking me what my secret was. I was going through a depression and was tempted to tell them the truth: "I'm so freaking miserable and in such a dark hole and I hate working here so much I have lost interest in everything. Food no longer tastes good and I can't muster up the energy to chew."

Fortunately, my depression has lifted. So, I have never successfully dieted. My two major weight losses were due to yoga and depression. I give a lot of credit to people who are strong and committed enough to stick to a sensible eating plan and work at reaching their weight loss goals in a healthy way. Right now, I am trying to improve my diet because I want to be healthier. I find it so hard to eat well, though. I'm so lazy.

Hi Flinty,
I think to get started, you'll need something fun that you like to do.
I would recommend doing those stability ball exercises. The ball makes the exercising a little easier and it's definetly funner. I exercise to Denise Austin routines but I'm sure there are plenty more of them to try-which I plan to, eventually.
Sometimes I put on the video just so I can "play" with the ball.
Maybe it's just me and my child spirit but the ball works for me.
Hope this helps a little.

Hi self-helpers!

I'm back. Sorry I was totally missing for a week. My computer had enough problems that I had to install Windows again and transfer old data to the new Windows. It can't be healthy to be so dependent on a computer but I'm a lot happier when it is working well.

Glad to see there has been an active discussion during the last week. The discussion of weight is important. I'm sorry to hear that Flinty is already concerned at age 27. It is a problem that needs attention early in life--if you have more than 20 pounds to lose, it is a struggle. I gained 10 to 20 pounds during my middle years (30 to 60) and was sort of on a constant diet. This was my experience:

Although I'm not highly social, it was easier for me to exercise with others. For 20 years during my 40's and 50's, I jogged with a few friends. I would never have gotten up a 5:00 AM and ran 3 miles or so without having made a commitment with friends to be there with them in the Illinois snows. During the last ten years, I have worked out 6 days a week on the machines at the YMCA. My wife is devoted to yoga at 6:00 AM so we go to the Y together. Without "Run for Your Live" friends and my Yoga-loving wife I would never have been a devoted exerciser.

Some people can discipline themselves but I need help. Each of us have to work out our own program. I think sweating and breathing hard for 1/2 to one hour is good for you after sort of getting in shape.

Good luck to you all. May you live a long healthy life.

Clay

Hello Flinty.
KUDOS to you for wanting to get healthy. The best thing that i have ever found as far as dieting is the American Diabetes Association website there are meal plans and tips on eating to help you lose weight. I walk for exercise daily if possible. Take care I hope the best for you in your endeavours. Soidhonia

I think one of the key things in losing weight is to realize that to do so, your body needs good nutrition. Before you drop any food that you crave or love etc, first add in those foods that are good fuel for your body. This way, your body can help you lose the weight because it has what it needs before having to try and figure out what to do with the junk food.

You will find that as you feed your body well, many of the cravings will go away.

I follow any eating plan that guides itself by the glycemic loading of foods. I have found 2 recently. One is the Holford Diet, and another is the latest plan by nutrisystem. It was too difficult to learn about glycemic indexing of foods, but these two have gone ahead and done the computations resulting in the actual "loading" of foods to the body.

This way is also what diabetics etc follow. I think nutrisystem might have too much sugar for me (hypoglycemic) but I'm losing anyway... and once down to normal weight, won't use them only.

Plus, with eating good foods, you need to eat every 2 hours or so...something. This helps with keeping your metabolism revved, balances out the insulin and also helps you to know... I don't have to eat more right now, I will eat in less than 2 hours...

Recent studies have shown that it is the spiking of sugars in the body that causes the nicks in the arteries that lead to heart disease

What are a few of the good foods to eat? Apples, walnuts, almonds, cold water Salmon to name a few. I am amazed at how quickly I feel better after eating an apple.

A few foods to stay away from (unless in small amounts within a meal) are carrots and bananas. These two foods deliver the sugar directly to the bloodstream, causing a spike. After the spike drops, your feelings drop lower than you felt before... ah sugar!

TC

How is it going, Flinty?

Hi All,

Thank you for you responses....
It's nice to hear about everybodies opinion!!!

I have been doing regular exercise for the last 3 days.
I have brought myself a punching bag & some gloves & have spent 20 minutes a day beating up on the bag!!!

I have been really enjoying this as it gives me a chance to mentally train myself to be exercising & not to rely on others!! When I am getting towards the end of the workout, I talk to myself, telling myself that I do deserve to live & happy & healthy life! That I can beat my self esteem issues!!

I am feeling much more positive towards both myself & my exercise.

Flinty

I like the idea of using a punching bag! How inventive.

Flinty:

I'm responding to your next post where you are talking encouraging to yourself about exercising with gloves. Great idea if you enjoy it.

Actually, much of self-help is talking rationally and positively to yourself.

Maybe you can turn the boxing into a social game by finding some one else who wants to lose weight and train together...perhaps you need to get more comfortable with the exercises and then you can work out some fun activity over a long period of time. If you are able to somehow workout for several weeks or months, be sure to tell us about it.

drclay

drclay

I don't like to exercise but quite awhile ago I read that moderate exercise helps curb one's appetite. Very strenuous exercise increases appetite. I did find it to be true that I was able to be satisfied with less if I was exercising as well as dieting. When I was dieting alone, like when I am not dieting at all, it seems like my appetite is enormous.
Good luck in your endeavor. Maybe I will get some inspiration through cyber-osmosis.

Meta

I have lost 7lbs in 3 weeks (on glycemic loading way to eat...which imo is how everyone should eat.) I can't do excercise .. but work at not staying in one position too long (sitting, lying down, standing, walking) and breathing deeply (which is why aerobic exercise works so well.)

Brava, Skye.

How are you doing, Flinty?

thanks. I'll take 2 lbs a week... I wish to lose 18 more pounds...I have trip to NM mountains in August and the altitude will take it's toll on my breathing, I need to be as small as possible

Hi Everybody.....
It had been some time since I was here last, but I have good news.
I have managed to loose 5 kgs in the last 5 weeks!!!
I have managed to turn some of my negative thinking into positive, which has certainly helped me with motivation to exercise, that & I have a cash incentive, every 5 kgs I loose I put money aside, so that after reaching my first goal weight, I can treat myself!!

I am walking regularly & even during my lunch break at work & eating very healthy!!!
Still struggle on some days, but one thing I know for certain is that every day is a new day, so if I had a bad day yesterday, I don't dwell on it like I used to, I get up early & go for a walk & start again!!

I still have around 30-40 kilos to loose overall, but making good progress!!
Flinty

Exactly!

Just like one high fat meal doesn't make us fat (nor does one low fat meal make us slim)
one off day won't have that effect either.

Continue what is healthy, and you will eventually get there. Good wishes!

I to am struggling with a weight problem. I was my thinnest when I had a job that required me to move. I worked this one job in a warehouse (I swear it was at least a mile long!). I had to go back and forth from the office in the back to the office up front all day. I lost weight fast and didn't even have to think about it. Now I work at home (so I can raise my children) I'm on my computer all day so my bottom has taken the shape and size of my chair lol. I know how you feel, I have an terrible self image. It's funny I used to be a personal trainer now I need someone to get me motivated to move. I wish you the best of luck.

Hi vetswife. What type of visual cues do you have up for yourself, to motivate? Remember, add the good stuff( for you) before eliminating the bad stuff (you enjoy.)

I loved lifting weights it was my passion. I had a hard routine and I loved it, legs were my favorite body part to work out. I know what I need to do, and I want to do it in the worst way. I just can't get myself organized to find time to do it. Part of my problem is if I can't do it 110% I won't do it ("play hard or sit"). My priorities have changed in the biggest way, my children are my life. I switched careers so I could work at home and raise my children. My youngest starts pre-school in September of 09, I hope to drop her off to school then go right to the gym (I already has a life time membership). I would love to get started sooner but I just can't see how. I do sit ups every night but it's not doing anything at all). If you have any ideas on how I can get started sooner I'd be happy to hear them. My children will not stay in the daycare in the gym they've never been with anyone else but me. I've tried to get my husband to watch them but he is disabled and limited to how much he can do. I have to get my daughter to sleep before I can go, I usually fall asleep myself. I have three children 11, 4 and my daughter will be 3 this August. These are my obstacles.

I hope this is what you meant by what are my cues. Sorry my response was lengthy.

You can work on that either-or attitude (black and white thinking) by using CBT... small helps sticky posted at top of psychotherapy forum...

Ok, do small bits of it first. Don't bite off the whole job at once. Square away the first part you need done... maybe your healthy eating could begin now, if you aren't already?

Sit ups are good, if not done the old way. That proved to weaken stomach muscles! But a bent knee "crunch" is better. Children that age can have fun doing "exercises" with mommy! Maybe get them some plastic dumb bells to work out with, or exercise outfits...etc and special fruit drinks or something for the after workout treat!

Oh, if you modify the sit up, and as you come up towards the ceiling, slightly turn your elbow inward, you will work your abs too.

By cues I was thinking of motivating words, or pictures, a list works too.

Good wishes.

I've had some success this past year with getting my health back on track. I think the things that help me most were:
1. Taking at least some time for ME each day and getting out of my house. For me I am able to walk so I got out of the house and started walking the neighborhood in the morning before my kids got up. I think this had both physical and mental benefits.
2. I decided NOT to focus on losing weight. I knew if I made this my goal, the week I didn't lose anything I would get frustrated and stop. I instead decided I decided to focus on my health and not my weight. My goals were feeling better, walking longer, walking faster, moving more, instead of scale watching.
3.I started therapy because other areas of my life were out of balance. This helped put out some of the raging fires and enabled me to breathe more clearly and reengage with those around me.
4. Found a friend who partner with and signed up at a local gym. We did 1 hr daily workouts. We would chat and motivate each other and the stationary bike and elliptical machine were less boring. With the weather changing the gym membership got rid of the excuses that it was too cold or dark to walk. My friend lasted 4 months then tapered off, but it was long enough to get me into a routine that I kept all winter.
5. When I lost my workout partner I bought an ipod and started experimenting with different exercise sensations. I have ADHD so I never could get myself to do meditation or those relaxation breathing exercises. But I found out if I kept my body occupied I could kind of gain the same mental clearing effect during exercise. Focusing on my breathing, the rhythm of the movement, or the song playing on my ipod made the workout more interesting.
6. I started being mindful my caloric intake. In the past I could lose weight by counting calories. Just logging my intake was very effective for me. However, this time I chose not to do it that way because--I was not going to focus on my weight, I was focusing on my health. So instead of counting calories I decided to eat what I felt like eating and just make a conscious effort to watch my serving sizes and what I put on my food. I also tried to say aware of when I was full and stop eating at that point.
7. I started trying to plan my eating a little better. I am not much of a breakfast eater; however I forced myself to eat at least something for breakfast. I also am a person who forgets to eat at regular intervals and then gorges at dinner and grazes throughout the night. To combat this I chose to eat smaller amounts more frequently throughout the day. Instead of 3 large meals a day, I did 3 smaller meals and then a regular dinner with the family. I also tried to avoid eating snacks after 7 PM. Snacking while watching TV was a big problem for me.
8. At the six month mark I change my exercise routine and started to include light resistance exercises 2x/wk. A used a weight that I could do 12-15 reps with and then did 2 sets of each exercise. I don’t like lifting so I just did like 8 different exercises for the major muscle groups. This part of the workout was really boring so I’d mix and match the different exercises based on what I felt like doing that day. For example I would always do at least one triceps and one biceps exercise but it might be dumbbells one day, pulleys the next, and sometimes of the machines.
9. I change my exercise and the foods I eat with the seasons. For example now it is summer so I am eating a lot of fresh fruits and have moved my exercise back outside. I call up different people to walk with, go hiking, biking, golfing or just play with the kid in the yard. Eventually I'll do some swimming when my pool water gets warmer. My kids don’t mind turning blue but I’m not into that.

For me taking a more laid back approach to improving my health seems to be working. Before I would get really regimented and measure and control everything. Although I was able to take off some weight that way, I wasn’t happy and it did seem to say off. This time I’ve chilled out a bit and put my energy into doing things that make me feel better on the inside and amazingly the outside package has changed as well. I feel a lot better mentally and physically. I don’t think I suffered even a cold this winter and the last time I checked I was down 42 lbs.

Sorry for the long post hope you find something useful in it.