The Big C...(post contains graphic descriptions of a medical nature)

Hey everyone...

Just found out today....my mom has cancer. She's been spotting since February and just now went to see a gyno...I've been begging her for months to see a doc, but she always tries to tough it out...she's lost so much weight...

They found a tumor the size of her fist in her vaginal canal. The doctor can't even find her cervix behind it. The doc tried to probe the tumor, but it just started bleeding everywhere. What my mom first thought were blood clots are actually some sort of gelatinous sustance secreted by the tumor. She now has to see an onocologist to determine if it's malignant.

I can't believe this is happening. I'm just numb. I don't have anyone else but her. She is my everything. I have no idea how we're going to pay for the medical bills. And I'm getting ready to start my next semester at my university...I had to take a hiatus last semester because my mom had to be hospitalized due to an foot infection (she's a diabetic), so I can't take another semester off or I'll lose my finalcial aid. But I can't just leave her. And I'm so scared for her. I feel like I can't breathe.

I really need some support right now. I don't know what I'm going to do. I can't lose her. If I lose her, I'll lose my mind. She's only 48. God, this can't be happening! She's my mother !

Please, if anyone has had experience with this type of disease I'm open to advice.

And please, pray for her or send positive energy her way. I can't stand the thought of her being sick. I just can't.

Sincerely,

Alexiel

I don't have vaginal cancer I have Lymphoma a type of blood cancer that travels the body by way of the lymph nodes. but have met victims and survivors of many kinds of cancer since my diagnosis. Malignant or not the tumor will be taken out. if malignant Based on the type of cancer cells it contains she will have to take strong antibiotics, chemo, or radiation or a combo of them. Cancer is not always a death sentence. I have a friend who is a 9 year survivor of cancer, Im a 3 and a half year survivor of cancer, The oldest cancer survivor I know is 15 years and still going strong and she had stage 4 uterine cancer (cancer of the uterus). So this does not nessesarily mean your mom is going to die of cancer. Its been found and now being treated. So take it one day at a time and hang in there.

I don't have anything to offer but I did want to say that your post touched me deeply and that I am sending plenty positive energy to you and your Mother.

Angel there are programs for those without insurance to cover medical cost. When my mother was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer the hospital set it up for her..it is called the Hal Burton foundation. It covered all of my moms expenses.

If they have found a tumor it does not mean it is cancer until a biopsy is done to determine. Alot of prayers is what she needs right now. I will keep you both in mine.

(((((((((((((((((((Angel)))))))))))))))))))) I had cervical cancer when I was 19 which had spread to cause other tumors, which luckily they caught in time for me.. I know that the "C" word is one of the scariest to encounter in the medical world... My thoughts and prayers are out there for you and your mom!!!!! Take care and things will fall into place, call your local county department for some medical help, there is always something available to those in need.. Linda

To Everyone,

Thank you all so much. I'm feeling a bit better today. The discovery of the tumor really scared me--still scares me--but I'm trying to organize our options. My mom and I are looking into some payment options and trying to get as informed as possible about the risks and treatment plans of cervical tumors. The gyno says she'll probably need a hysterectomy, but the only think that worries us about that is infection.

I'll try to keep everyone updated about her condition. I can't begin to describe how grateful I am for all the prayers and positive energy. Thank you. Thank you all.

Hugs,

Alexiel

I had a complete hysterectomy when I was only 24. I have never heard of anyone getting an infection from that but of course I am sure it could happen but I would think that would be a very remote thing. She will feel much better after the hysterectomy.

I read cancer, but then later that your mom hadn't seen an oncologist yet. Please know that most women have some type of fibroid tumors during their lives. Most are not cancerous.

I'm eager to hear the outcome of her tests, hoping that's all this is... and that things have settled down for you. (((hugs)))

Oh, dear. That's a tough one.

You've already received some great advice, and the best part is, it's from people who been there, and got the t-shirt.

It doesn't matter what that thang is, it has to come out. So, organize yourself around that. She's going to be a little discomforted by the surgery. She may be temporarily incontinent. She may need your help, at her side.

The rest, you will know, in time. You have to let your head have a moment or two to ponder the implications of this news, but don't let it get stuck there. This will be lived in a series of todays, and getting your head stuck in tomorrow is only going to waste precious time today.

I know you're in our thoughts and prayers. Keep talkin', 'kay?

Lar

I'm so sorry to hear this.
You can find some good information at
www.cancer.org
Also, the website www.hystersisters.com
has lots of information on cancer of the female organs.
Sending you many positive thoughts.

Boo Radley

Thanks everyone, for your support. Well, the doctors couldn't do a biopsy of the mass because it's just too big and bleeds too easily. Mom's scheduled for outpatient surgery on Tuesday so the gyn can perform a hysteroscopy and D&C to determine if it's invasive. The doc says that she'll probably be able to go home after the procedure, but to pack a bag just in case. It's a 2 hour drive to the hospital, but I'm going to stay with her. I'm so worried for her--I just want her to be okay.

I'm so bloody stressed right now. One of my kittens has been fighting a highly contagious form of feline rhinotraceitis for over two weeks now, and she's so little. Her mother abandoned her at 3 weeks, so I've been bottle-feeding her myself, trying to get her well. The vet prescribed some meds for the illness, but they didn't do squat. Last Friday, I awoke to find that both of her eyes had ruptured because of the infection and one had popped out entirely. I screeched and rushed her to the vet hospital, and the vet told me that both of her eyes must be removed. So, I'm supposed to pick her up later today--if she survives the surgery. It has a 25% fatality rate for kittens her age, and she's also been sick, so...

I just can't take it. This couldn't have come at a worse time. I don't have they money to pay the vet bill, so I'm either going to have to take out a loan or argue out a payment option at the vets (and they're really *****y about being paid immediately--I've been a very good client thus far, but I still expect a fight). The emotional & financial toll is incredible. I feel like I'm being torn apart at the seams. Plus, tomorrow I have to go with my mom to the hospital--who will be there to give my kitten her medicine? Pets aren't allowed in the hospital. The only person who could do it is my grandmother--but she can't see well and is so forgetful, I'm afraid to let her feed & medicate my baby. It's so nuts. I wish I could just hide.

I'm gonna have to figure something out, and soon. I've been looking at the sites you all mentioned and I can't say how incredibly grateful I am for all the support. You guys are the best!

I'll keep everyone posted on Mom's progress--and please, keeps those prayers coming.

Big hugs to all,

Alexiel

They can do a biopsy after removing the tumor. in fact I think it is the normal protocal in hospitals to do biopsys on any tumors to find out if it is malignant or benigh. So your mother will know before she is even released from the hospital after the surgery. Also when the doctor was examining your mother and located the tumor he would have done test to see if the fluid that was leaking from it contained cancer cells which it would have if it was malignant for a cancer tumor produces cancer celled filled fluid. since she has not been told that cancer cells were found in the fluid she does not have cancer. so you can relax.. Sorry about your kitten.Take care.

they don't always know at the time of biopsy if something is cancer or not. please be careful about saying that. she needs to wait to see what the dr says. please don't give someone false hopes.

I have to agree with bebop. It is totally premature to conclude anything at all. Let's wait for the doctors to do their thing. A complicated situation like this might have a complicated solution.

In time, more information will be available. And I am sure the doctors will respond in an appropriate way.

While we're waiting, I'll hold you in my prayers.

Lar

The persons gyn exam was on or before june 8th 2006. (Date of orininal post on this issue) during gyn exams Pap smears are done. Especially when tumors and cysts are present. It only takes a couple days to get those results back when it is not a rush. being the tumor was present the pap smear would have included smears of the tumor and tumor fluids and the results would have been put through labled "STAT" meaning the doctor needed the results right away.

The person who the exam was done on would have gotten a phone call from the physician stating more tests needed to be done because the results of the smears turned up abnormal (cancer cells) or she would have gotten a letter in the mail notifying her that her exam results were with in normal range.

How do I know this - I have cancer and have been going through all these varieties of biopsys, blood tests, smears, MRI's, Barium X-rays, and other type of X- rays like CAT Scans and so on, endoscopies, colonoscopys, mamograms,colposcopys. and even more tests then I can remember how to spell for the past 4 and a half years.

Cancers run in my family and have family members in that have had tumors and cysts removed from the vigina and uterious and overies. They were all in other states and in each case they had the reults of benign or malignant before surgery and during surgery biopsys were taken. By the time they woke up from the anestesia the biopsy results were available because hospitals have their own labs for doing bloodwork and biopsys. on material removed during surgery.

A third reason that I know all this is because I have family members that are surgins, nurses, and physicians.

I meant something very simple, just so you know better what I meant. A large growth can be more than one tissue type. A benign fibroid tumour can have other types of growth mixed into it. Hidden from sight, and from surface sampling, as by Pap smear. It is simply premature to assume anything. It takes time to sort out the details.

Lar

I see. Sorry I misunderstood you.

Hi everyone,

Well, Mom has to go for her tests today...I'm really hoping for some good news. I had to see my PDoc yesterday and told him what was happening. During my visit at the clinic my PDoc said that because of the size of the mass there is a good chance that it is just a fibroid tumor and not cancer. I hope he's right--if he is, I swear I'll send him a bouqet of roses. My fingers are crossed-!

Picked up my kitten from the vet today and so far, she's doing fine. They had to remove both of her eyes--it's kinda creepy-looking with two dark indentations in her face. For some reason, she reminds me a little of this guy:

<-----------Oogie Boogie from "The Nightmare Before Christmas"



But I still think she's beautiful. Anyway, the bill for her treatment was $127. I had to take out another loan for the treatment. I'm so broke it's not even funny. But get this--after she arrived home I went to check on my other kittens and guess what? ANOTHER one has popped out an eye! WTF?!? What's going on here?? God, I cannot take this. Well, at least this kitten doesn't seem as bad as the first--she still has one good eye and the bad eye is only protruding slightly. So, I'll be going back to the vet's office, possibly today, but no later than tomorrow. I don't know how I'm going to pay this next bill--I guess after the surgery I'll have to snatch the kitten and run. I cannot deny her healthcare--but I wish I knew who abandoned these kittens on my property in the first place. I'd knock them senseless. Life sure does have excellent timing.

I better try and get some sleep. Please continue to pray for my mom--and send a few prayers to my kittens too. They certainly could use them.

With love,

Alexiel

I will be praying today. what does the vet think caused the eyes to popout on the kittens?

Hope things turn out o.k. for your Mom. That is most important. I am no vet but have taken care of lots of orphan animals on the farm. Try feeding the kittens dry kitten food soaked with water and give them water to drink. Maybe they are too small for the meds they are on. I had three week old kittens that did fine like that. Good luck!!

It's almost for certain it's a fibroid. It always was almost for certain a benign mass. I think the world record size for a fibroid tumour is over 300 lbs. And once it's out, for thoroughness, they dissect it, and make sure that there wasn't something else coincidentally buried in with the fibroid tissue. Just for thoroughness, they'll cut it up, and be sure.

Hopefully, once that thing is gone, all the other health issues that came with it will go away, too. The heavy monthly bleeding. The anemia. The fatigue. They're all part of the tumour thing, too.

One day at a time, you're going to do what needs doing. I pray for strength to come into your lives.

That kitten thing has me stunned. I have never heard of that happening before. If it's a virus, I sure hope they get immune to it, quickly.

Lar

what a load on your shoulders! i wish i could come and bring my infamous sour cream cookies and tea and we'd all just relax and let all of this roll off into space.....but, since i can't do that....i'm doing my best to send you all the positive vibes that you can use now.

you are truly a very kind and loving spirit to care so much for your mom and the kittens. you're a very strong, strong person.

please PM me.xoxoxo pat

Hi everyone,

Well, Mom finally got her biopsy and I'm horrified to say, it's cancer. The doc removed a tumor so large it had to be held with both hands. It had grown from the womb downward, and even though the tumor's been removed, the cancer has spread to the walls of the vagina and can only be treated with aggressive radiation & chemo. The doc says it's either Stage II B or Stage III--and God, how that scares me.

Next month she starts the cancer treatments. I can't help but remember how she went to her regular doc complaining of bleeding and ovarian pain, and how he told her that "It's nothing to worry about." He wouldn't even give her a referral to see a gyno. The onocologist said the cancer has been there for a long time--and he actually had the nerve to try to scold my mom for not seeking treatment sooner! I chewed him a new one, I was so mad--Mom's insurance won't pay for gyno visits unless she gets a referral from her regular doc, and the gynos in my area usually won't even see you without a referral. None of this is her fault and I made damn sure that onocologist understood that before we left. I swear, if anything happens to my mother, I'll have that stupid GP's head on a platter, I swear it.

Anyway, the onocologist took a picture of the inside of Mom's vagina. The tissue should look like the inside of your cheek--but this is how her's looks:



I just want her to be okay. I would give anything, ANYTHING for her to be well. I love her so much. She had me cut her hair yesterday in preperation for the chemo--her hair was long and silver and beautiful. But her new haircut is cute, too. I decided to shave all of my hair off as well, so she wouldn't have to be bald alone. I don't mind--it's only hair. My hair grows quickly anyway, so it's no big deal. I've also promised her a nice wig for her birthday next month. I hope she finds one she likes. Oh, and the kittens are doing well so far. The eyeless kitten (whom I've dubbed "Nell") sockets are infected--no surprise, considering her upper resp--so I'm taking her back to the vet today for a checkup. The other kitten is lively and will be returning home from surgery soon.

This is my mom, by the way. Post haircut.



Please keep the prayers and good thoughts coming. Thank you all so much for your kind words and support. You all are so wonderful, I cannot even begin to express my gratitude. Never doubt how beautiful and special you all are.

Hugs,

Alexiel

gosh your mom looks so young! I am so sorry to hear the news. Maybe they can give her the chemo that doesn't make your hair fall out! I will keep you and her in my prayers. please keep us posted on her ok?

again I say to everyone please don't try to diagnose and give false hopes. this is a prime example.

I didn't see any diagnosing going on. I didn't see any false hopes. We were talking about statistics, while waiting for the laboratory and the pathologist to do their thing.

Well over 99% of the time, a tumour in a woman's reproductive tract is a benign tumour. That's well known, but there are exceptions. Unfortunately, this time, the exception is what we are seeing.

Alexiel, may your mother know God's grace, and healing powers.

Lar